It was just another typical evening for you. You browsed your favorite websites, downloaded the latest episodes of your favorite anime series, and fapped to a couple of new doujins you had found. You look around your desk and see that it's littered with empty cartons of instant food and cans of beer. You notice that your favorites figures are quickly becoming surrounded by the piles and piles of filth. You sigh and get back to your usual browsing. It's been so long since you've been in this endless routine of sleeping whenever you were tired, and spending every waking moment surfing the net, that you forget exactly when was the last time you had any real human interaction.
“People suck anyways”, you mumble as you click on your favorite image board.

You take a quick glance at the threads on the first page – a ronery thread, a “3d girls” thread, a sacchin thread, and the rest seem to be the usual slew of Touhou threads. You reply to each thread deftly, with the usual replies; “so ronery”, “3d is pig disgusting”, “Isn't it sad ;_;”, and the touhou threads with some borderline worksafe pics. You lurk for a couple of more hours, participating in a few interactive stories based in alternate universes, and finally start chatting up some of your internet friends through IM. Ah, perfect one of your best buddies just came online. You start up a conversation:

anoNEET: Hey there, 'sup?
Teru-hime: Yo! Just the guy I was hoping to talk to!
Teru-hime: You're a big fig collector right?
anoNEET: Yeah lol.
Teru-hime: and you like that bullet hell game right?
anoNEET: like? Moar liek loev.
Teru-hime: then check this out [hyperlink]
Teru-hime: a limited edition perfect grade figure signed by the drunken master himself.
anoNEET: DO WANT
anoNEET: but it costs a lot lol
Teru-hime: that doesn't matter man, DO IT and buy it. It's a once in a lifetime opportunity.
anoNEET: hmmm, I'll think about it.
Teru-hime: hurry up 'cuz i don't think it'll be up for long tbh.
Teru-hime: gonna get something to eat ttyl.

Just like that you are presented with a most troublesome dilemma; on the one hand you can buy this awesome fig and *hehehehe* 'hot-glue' it or you can save the money for stuff like food and that awesome Tsukihime remake that's coming out soon (you can finally get sacchin's route). You're torn between the two, and time isn't on your side. You gotta make a decision NOW.

[ ] Buy limited edition fig
[ ] Don't buy limited edition fig

[ ] Don't buy limited edition fig

[X] Buy limited edition fig
You don't have to buy that remake, you know.

[X] Buy limited edition fig.

Food? Hah, we've evolved to subsist on a diet of lulz and DESPAIR. Food is no longer necessary.

[] Don't buy, im sure ill need the monies for something else

[ ] Don't buy limited edition fig

also,

[ ] Don't buy the game either. BT is there for a reason.

[ ] Buy limited edition fig

I'm a fig-fag.

>you can buy this awesome fig and *hehehehe* 'hot-glue' it

I don't think I like this Anonymous very much.

[ ] Don't buy limited edition fig

>>254

[X] Buy limited edition fig.

Tsukihime anime remake?!

NEET-WANT
MESSY DESK-WANT
FIG LOVER-DO NOT WANT

[ x ] Don't buy limited edition fig

I bet this Anon is some fatfuck.

[X] Buy limited edition fig.

>>264

Going by the above, he must be pushing 300.

[ ] Buy limited edition fig.

oh god yes touhou figure

[ ] Buy limited edition fig.

Well, considering I bought the Keine figure on YAJ for $400, I'd buy whatever this one is if it existed.

[X] Buy limited edition fig

You can download the Tsukihime remake, fags.

I didn't expect the first 5 to be [] don't buy. This makes it interesting. I'm writing now. Wait a it.

Hell of a picture to start with...

>>270

Gee, it sure would be nice to know the vote limit beforehand.

>>270
forgot to mention that it was first to 5 in the op.

[X] Don't buy limited edition fig

You figure that you'll get another chance to buy the figure and that it's not worth stretching your finances thin at the moment. You set your torrents to download and instead go to sleep. Bah, it's not like that fig would've been the catalyst for something much bigger than you, right? Maintaining the status quo of your lifestyle is the best thing to do, after all. You drift off to sleep with these thoughts in your mind.

Dream option time:
[ ] option 1
[ ] option 2

>>268

For $400, it should look fucking awesome. Pics?

>>273
Well truth be told I was trying to decide between 5 and 7, and well since the first couple of replies were don't buy, I decided to go down that road to teach you a lesson in plot devices. If it makes you feel better, you can vote to decide how many should be the limit.
[] 5
[] 7
[] 10

[X] None of them.

Vote counts are shit. Just cut off when you want to write and count the votes from before the cutoff.

>>278
second this, first to X just leads to more spamming and snap retarded decisions by anon.

>>274
[X] Wake up and buy the figure.

>>279

No, it would increase the spamming.

Okay fine, I'll decide that the cutoff is now 7. However still have to vote for >>274
choose one of the options (no write-ins for this one).

>>274
[✗] Wake up and buy the figure.
>>276
[✗] Popularity.

>>274
[X] Thumb.

[X] 7

Hey, lucky number 7.

>>276
As >>278, >>279, and >>281 point out, any given vote limit may lead to calculated F5'ing and vote spamming.

...don't tell us what any possible vote limit is. Just choose one on your own, and change it if you please. Hell, if the votes are close enough, you can even pick one that you just think would be the most fun/awesome to write.

>>274
I reject your reality and substitute it with my own.

[] Wake up and buy the figure.

I didn't make the bed. Some fags who hate figures (even if it's an obvious plot device, hurr) made it. I just refuse to sleep in it.

>>280
>>283
>>284
>>287
Sorry anon, you've made your bed now lie in it. You can't wake up from *this* dream, and it's an either or deal here.
>>286
I'll do this, I'll keep around 7 for the cut off, but it'll ultimately come down to popular opinion and my own gut feeling. This way the more thought out selections will be encouraged and we'll avoid some of the AIDS that has plauged these threads.

[ ] "Yeah, I'm a strong guy. You haven't made me your bodyguard without a reason, right?"

>>291
You're doing it wrong.

[orz] Wake up and buy the figure.

>>290
you cant tell me what to do
[c] Wake up and buy the figure.
as a figure collector myself im raging at the fact we passed up an opportunity even if it is in a story

>>274

[x] option 1

Also ITT BAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

[x] Dream about buying the fig

>>290
I was going to vote for a real option. Now I'm voting for this out of spite.

[X] Wake up and buy the figure.

[X] Option 2

One is lonely, etc. Do not want lonely.

>>290
Why are you giving us dream "options"? I mean, it's not like we can base our choice on anything meaningful. May as well flip a coin yourself instead to keep the story moving.

>>299
A little variety. It may or may not have to do with the main story.
>>295
Since it's the first real answer this far (and I need to drive my point home here since too many people insist on reversing the irreversable) I'll be using this reply.

You realize that you are flying as you look confoundedly at your surroundings. Boobs everywhere, delicious perfectly round mammaries with gentle pink nipples. As far as the eye can see. Thank god this isn't one of these freudian dreams you think, because otherwise this landscape would be full of penises. As you bask in the glory of these superb hooters, you can't help but feel that something is different from your usual lewd dreams - for starters it's the first time you dream about just boobs instead of your usual harem of touhoes. Ah well, you enjoy the sight as you zip around in a wonderland of knockers.

The poorly closed curtains filter in sunlight into the room and before long, the full wrath of the morning sun is upon your face. You wake up, quite groggy from all the drinking last night and think about what to do. As you analyze your options you can't help but try to recall a strange dream you had last night. It seemed quite eerie and somehow prophetic, but that seems all too far away now for some reason. You shrug off these peculiar feelings as you get up and get ready for another day of what seems to be an endless cycle of browsing.

------------------------------
Going to take a 10 minute break, and I'll resume after that

>>300
Oh, good, now we're doing first choice like WUiG

>>300
RAGE in every field.

>>300
[X] Go to your computer and buy the figure.

>>300
Our write ins were "real" answers. We demand to kick logic to the curb and to reverse the unreversable.

[x] See if you can still get that fig

>>300

And now we see just how crushing Anon's real life is.

~ZAWA ~ZAWA

>>300
[X] Drown yourself in the lake and start from the beginning.

no, no, forget touhou. ITT we RP being Anonymous IRL.

And then, Anonymous posts in an RP thread.

Holy shitfuck the recursion...

This feels like, what was that VN Colombia wrote? Anon's Daily Life?

[X] See if you can still get that fig

figfag will not be pleased until we get that figure

Can we commit suicide and start over again, so we can choose the plot device?

If so,
[X] Cut throat and start from the beginning.

>>308
this actually have plenty of potential for awesome. Touhous start showing up in Anon's life, taking the place of parents, friends, acquaintances, as if they've always been there. All the while Anon suspects that they really haven't changed at all and he's just losing his mind.

FUCK THE FIG

what is your obsession with the damn fig, figfags?

Continuing here (don't worry I won't go for first replies anymore):
-------------------------
You quickly check to see if the fig is there because a little voice tells you it was important. You discover that the figure never was for sale - in fact it never existed! Perplexed, you let it go sinking into your usual routine.


The weeks go by, and you continue indulging in your NEET lifestyle. Oblivious to the outside world, you are unaware of the debate surrounding the law to eliminate welfare and impose forced labor for those who 'did not contribute to society'. The law is passed by a narrow margin, endangering your way of life without your knowledge. It isn't long before government officials show up to your place and serve you with the following option: work or get evicted.

While you aren't the fittest human specimen, you ain't no tub of lard either, but you can't bring yourself to work after all these years of inactivity. You face eviction, soon thereafter losing all your belongings in a PVC flamability issue you were previously unaware of (who woulda thunk that them plastic toys would burn so well?).

With nothing left, you turn to begging on the streets for food and internet access. Your cries for help go unheeded in this increasingly darwinistic society and you find yourself soon frail and internet depraved. You eventually get picked up by some sort of Christian organization for the assuage of your suffering, and find yourself dying on a filthy bed somewhere with the other homeless social rejects. As your condition worsens, you start having delusions of your past possesions and as you sit on your deathbed, that one figure comes to mind. The figure that got away. You use all your remaining strength to reach for the imaginary figure but your arm quickly falls back down.

The next morning your body is unceremoniously removed from the premises and dumped in a ditch. You are slightly missed by your internet friends, especially by the one with the online handle “Teru-hime”. Surely you didn't deserve an end like this?

Life is crueler than fiction - NEET Normal End GET

>>313
No good figfag passes up a rare figure.

>>314
Thank you.

>>314
THIS PLEASES ME GREATLY.

>>314
wait, the players pass up on your mcguffin, so rocks fall and everybody dies.

boy, I sure hope you never DM.

Now, see?

Buying figs can save your sorry ass.

>>314
keikaku doori

It's time for everybody's favorite hint corner “Tasukette Eirin!”

“Hi and welcome everyone for the first edition of 'Tasukette Eirin!', I'm your host, Eirin Yagokoro.”

“This section is to help anon understand the big picture of the story, as well as to provide hints when stuck.”

“Since this isn't a BAD END, but a normal end I shouldn't tell you anything except what you should already know - don't ignore obvious plot devices! It might be acceptable once the story gets rolling to focus on certain routes, but not at the very beginning anon! Shame on you!”

“There's just one more thing I want to tell you about this ending, there's a 'true' varient, and apparently it's both satisfying and heart-wrenching. According to the scenario notes it's called 'unlimited fig works'. Hmmm... what a peculiar name, I wonder how you get it....”

“Well take care then and may we meet soon again!”

Restart game y/n?

chu chu! chu chu! chu chu! chu chu!

i think eientei's a pretty cool guy, eh gets killed and doesnt afraid of anything

[Y]

Begin anew.

>>321
N

Y

>>318
It's a natural progression for a NEET to turn out this way. It wouldn't be much of a story if say, Link instead of helping the deku tree chose to remain an ignorant little boy. He'd probably have grown older and then have been forced to leave the forest as the darkness crept from hyrule.

This is probably a record. Even /shrine/ took two choices before Normal Ending us. /Eientei/ was over in, essentially, one choice.

>>327
IRL, NEETS in general do not end up homeless and dying on a dirty bed. Some do, but not many.

A DM holds all the cards. Players pass up a mcguffin? turns out it's not the mcguffin after all. In fact, the mcguffin is something else. it's like magician's choice. sudden deaths for completely normal and innoculous choices just because that's not how it was planned out is just stupid.

if we're gonna die every time we pass up on a plot device, then...

N

SKIP PREVIOUSLY READ TEXT.

You feel a shudder as if you whole being depended on you buying the fig, and so you feel compelled to buy it.

[X] Buy limited edition fig

You decide to screw saving money and to live for the present. Who need security for their future anyways? Not you, you've got a plethora of figs you can admire and 'use'. You quickly snatch up the fig before any other cretin can beat you to it and choose to have the fastest delivery method in order to get it as soon as possible. Your loins are literally quivering with anticipation as you go to bed, secure in the knowledge that the fig will be there by this time tomorrow. You close your eyes and soon drift off to sleep.

Beer. Wine. Spirits. As far as your eye can see there's some sort of alcohol. “Delicious elixir of life - you must drink” you hear a voice say. You walk around drinking the various essences, meeting different denizens of this realm. You see, of course, the Irish drinking somewhere, the French with their berets drinking wine, and a bunch of programmers drinking beer and whiskey. You walk over to the programmers and ask what's up. They say that they're trying to maintain the 'Balmer constant' and they shouldn't be bothered. You shrug and start to walk away when you spot very thin Asian man drinking ungodly amounts of beer and seemingly multitasking between drawing, composing music, and programming. As you approach him, his gaze meets yours and he gives you a knowing smile. He promptly disappears into a cloud of what appears to be alcohol vapor and you're left there wondering what is going on.

The poorly closed curtains filter in sunlight into the room and before long, the full wrath of the morning sun is upon your face. You wake up, quite groggy from all the drinking last night and think about what to do. As you analyze your options you can't help but try to recall a strange dream you had last night. It seemed quite eerie and somehow prophetic. You shrug off these peculiar feelings as you get up and get ready for another day of what seems to be an endless cycle of browsing.

----------
will write up the next bit and options in a jiffy. Also BAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWW, i fucked up the most obvious plot device ever. It's the first choice fags, it's the only one that matters like this. You can't have an adventure without the adventure actually beginning, I hope you understand.

>>329
>A DM holds all the cards. Players pass up a mcguffin? turns out it's not the mcguffin after all. In fact, the mcguffin is something else. sudden deaths for completely normal and innoculous choices just because that's not how it was planned out is just stupid.
This. Not that a DM should bend the story so that things always end up going in the planned direction--that's railroading just as much as sudden death for ignoring a plot hook is. Things should be kept flexible enough so that the story is always moving. Bad Ending for stupidity is fine; ____ Ending for ignoring a plot hook is poor DMing.

>>331
So the first choice (figure) wasn't a real choice, and the second choice (dream) also wasn't a real choice? Inefficient. Might as well just turn on autopilot.

Around midafternoon, a knocking sound comes from the door and you realize that your figure must have arrived. You find it to be strange that your fig arrived THAT quickly, but you get up and go get the door. Sure enough it's your fig. You sign the paper the deliveryman gives you and carry your prize into your lair. You carefully unwrap your package and take your treasure out from its box. It's even more beautiful than you imagined. The fig is a masterpiece, carefully sculpted, with a fitting color palette. You notice a strange insignia on the bottom of the fig, something like a signature of sorts. Being filled with excitement as you are, you don't take heed of it, place the figure on your desk and try to decide what to do. Your loins are absolutely about to erupt in excitement about the prospect of hotgluing the figure.

[ ] Hotglue the figure
[ ] Forget about that and brag on the internet
[ ] Examine the fig with more patience
--------------
write-ins are in full effect btw, the last bit was just to illustrate a fucking point. Won't happen again.

[ ] Examine the fig with more patience before Hot-gluing it.

[X] Respek knuckles

[ ] Examine the fig with more patience

>>254

[ x ] Examine the fig with more patience

all while...
[ x ] braggin' on the internets

FUCK DO NOT WANT HOTGLUNONYMOUS.

[x] Examine the fig with more patience before Hot-gluing it.

Two choices in one!

>>335

Forgot your pic.

>>332
The second choice was a real choice. I just chose the other option for a little variety since the other time it was a bad end. And the dreams ARE related to the storyline. Also the whole day zero (in which we are now) is more of an introduction to anon and defining a bit of his background (through the actions he does now).

TL;DR don't question the motherfucking DM

turn figure around, take clothes/pieces off, scan, x-ray, sonar, tongue probe etc...

>>333
[x] Forget about that and brag on the internet

A true collector would not let its value depreciate.

[X] Forget about that and brag on the internet.
[X] Examine the fig with more patience.

As all good users must, we will brag on the net as we always do. Meanwhile, we'll be getting a closer look at this masterpiece.

[ ] Hotglue the figure
Do it faggots.

[X] Forget about that and brag on the internet.
[X] Examine the fig with more patience.

Since all the answers are pretty much even (with examine with more patience coming in the lead but the secondary options more or less tied) I'll write something combining them all.

[x] Hotglue the figure
[x] Forget about that and brag on the internet
[x] Examine the fig with more patience

You decide you want to enjoy your fig fully. After all, this is a once in a lifetime purchase. You first examine the fig, taking note of it's particularities. The worksmanship seems truly sublime, as you notice that this might be even hand made, or at the very least partially handcrafted. The paint is nice and even, and they've used the colors appropiately to bring out the allure of your favorite touhoe. Turning it upside down, you are glad to see they kept the realism (if you know what I mean). On the bottom of the base you see that weird signature-like symbol. Taking a closer look, you see it's definitely not machine made and might have been made by a delicate brush. More puzzling still, is the fact that while examining it under your trusty magnifying glass you see what could be the beginings of something that can only be described as a cross between a circuit board and a magical circle. You prop the figure back onto your desk and move on to your next step.

You take a bunch of pictures of your acquisition and post them on your favorite imageboards.
“Those suckers must be jealous of my awesome new fig” You think whilst trying to increase your e-peen. You even go as far as talking to most of your IM contacts to show off your fig, but your best friend there 'Teru-hime' seems to be offline, instead her nick is set to a somewhat omminous message:

“The gateway to other worlds is found through our own obsessions”

You find this odd, but continue to show off you fig to the rest of your contacts.

Finally, you decide to do the deed and hot-glue the sucker. You don't even need auxiliary material as you are quite excited due to the whole ordeal and easily apply your homemade glue to the delicate features of the fig. You take pictures and post it on that imageboard dedicated to hotglue and find that you are simply exhausted. You don't know if it's due to the load you blew or a simple adrenaline crash.

Your eyelids are getting heavier by the moment.

[ ] Go to bed right now
[ ] Grab an energy drink and try to stay awake
[ ] Anemia option

[x] Anemia option
This is always fun.
TASUKETTE EIRIN

how's he supposed to grab an energy drink, he's got no money now remember?
[ ] Fall Asleep, maybe that way i can go back to the boobs

[ ] Anemia option

Good, Shiki, you're looking kind of anemic.

[ ] Anemia option

[x] Anemia option
Suddenly, Anonymous has AIDs!

[X] Go to bed right now.

On an unrelated note, we've filled the other niches, so I hope we get the chance to play as a trap somewhere down the line.

>>347

>Finally, you decide to do the deed and hot-glue the sucker. You don't even need auxiliary material as you are quite excited due to the whole ordeal and easily apply your homemade glue to the delicate features of the fig. You take pictures and post it on that imageboard dedicated to hotglue and find that you are simply exhausted. You don't know if it's due to the load you blew or a simple adrenaline crash.

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

[x] Anemia option

When in doubt, collapse from anemia.

Anemia wins, writing now.

[x] Anemia option

You try to get up, but it's too late. It seems that this is one of your episodes of what can only be described as KEYAIDS. You fall backwards tripping on your own pants that were on your ankles from the hot-gluing, knocking over all your figs and dirty tissues on yourself, sullying you both physically and your pride. As you're blacking out you can't help but wonder if you overexerted yourself too much and why the darkness wasn't complete. As your brains puts itself into sleep mode you can't help but image that you hearing someone snickering off into the distance.

What seems like an eternity transpires. Some of your senses return but you can't see anything around you. In fact you can't feel anything nor smell anything either. Only your sense of sound is stimulated as you hear what can only be described as a dragging noise off in the distance.

[ ] Make an effort to say something
[ ] Wait
[ ] Go with the flow and give in to the darkness

[] WAIT!

[z] Go with the flow and give in to the darkness
With the flow of the go I go

[X] Make an effort to say something.

"Mrrgle? Haff on on? Fher mah?"

[x] Make an effort to say something
"You might take my figs, you might take my beer, but you'll never take MY FREEDOM!"

[x] Make an effort to say something
so i herd u liek mudkips

[x] Make an effort to say something
"UR A FAGET"

[x] Make an effort to say something
WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM?

[x] Make an effort to say something
"UR A FAGET"

Voting this, could have very interesting results

A true fig-fag would never 'hotglue'.

-_- This Anon is the scariest.

I hope something horrible happens to him. Scum like this don't deserve any better.

>>365

[x] Make an effort to say something
"UR A FAGET"

Thirded
awesome.jpg

[X] Make an effort to say something

You gather all of your strength in an attempt to say something. You can feel the spiral ene-errr strength flowing through your body (wherever that is). You build up your power, and feel you are about to burst with an epic message. When you reach your boiling point you unleash your fury!

“U...........F...OT.....”

This is all you manage to say as you feel all that power quickly fade away. You suddenly hear the dragging stop and a distinctive voice says something. You can't make out what it's saying but what you can tell the words “surprise”, “tough”, and “conscious” are clearly uttered.

What you do hear clearly is the following:

“I guess I'll knock him out myself”

As you hear that, you panic, but not having the strength nor simple awareness of the situation makes it difficult to resist. And as sure as rain, you soon feel that the bloodflow to your brain is being cut and can't help to pass out.

As you come to, you find that you're in a japanese-style room. Still groggy, you wonder where you are and what happened. Maybe you should stay put since you feel weak, or maybe you can try to find out where you are.

[ ] Stay put
[ ] Search the room
[ ] Attempt to leave

[x] Loot the room

[X] Stay put.

Best not to wander about while you're groggy.

[x] Attempt to leave
Anon on the run

[x] Search the room
[x] Attempt to leave
Fuck, I'm being kidnapped!

[X] Get ye flask.

[x] Attempt to leave
Let's see how this goes.

[x] Attempt to leave

Despite the overwhelming grogginess, you decide that it'd be best if you left. You think it might be good to search the room, but you just take a quick glance and determine that there's nothing of interest (at least not in plain sight). You make your way to the door and open it cautiously, it's a long hallway and you can either go left or right.

[ ] Go left
[ ] Go right
[ ] Return to the room

[X] Go straight.

[x] Go right

>>376
You go straight and crash against the opposing wall. OUCH! You get back up from your embarrassing mistake and return to the door of the room.

[ ] Go left
[ ] Go right
[ ] Return to the room

[x] Go right

[X] Go right.

Right is right.

>>378
haha, well worth a try
[ ] Go right

[ ] Go right

You decide to go right.

You make your way down the corridor, arriving at a door, there seems to be some noise coming from the other side.

[ ] open door
[ ] go back

[x] Go wrong

[x] open door
Open sesame

[x] Eavesdrop

[x] Eavesdrop
Let's see how long we can run around Eintei without getting caught.

[x] Eavesdrop
Solid Snake style, next find a box.

[x] Eavesdrop

Recalling your ninja train-errr videogames, you decide to eavesdrop before opening the door. You carefully plant your ear on the door, hoping to hear what's going inside. As you place your ear on the door, it opens, leaving face to face (rather, face to ear) with a very surprised girl.

In this brief moment of shock it seems that you can do something before she reacts.

[ ] Jump her
[ ] Attempt to greet her
[ ] 180 followed by tactical retreat

[x] Salute

[X] Attempt to greet her.

"Hey, baby."

[X] 180 followed by tactical retreat.
Just dont look into her eyes.

[x] Attempt to greet her

This bunny... it was made for me...

DRR DRR DRR

[x] Moonwalk your way outta there

THIS WOULD BE SO AWESOME

Also, inb4 FIFTY YEARS

[ ] 180 followed by tactical retreat

Though, we're already facing in a direction we can run in so why not just run?

[x] 180 followed by tactical retreat.
let's play catch me with the bunny.

>>395
Running into her, eh? I like the way you think. Also more votes plox, and as you've noticed I enjoy write-ins (if they're good).

[x] Attempt to greet her. Ask her why she's wearing rabbit ears.

Confused, kidnapped and delusional Anonymous is confused, kidnapped and delusional.

[x] Touch those rabbit ears.

>>254
[ x ] Attempt to greet her

SOCIALAWKWARDSTUTTERINGHOTGLUNONYMOUSGO!

[x] Attempt to greet her

You quickly grab the initiative and greet the girl before she can react.

“Hey there, how's it going?”

You attempt to ask why she has rabbit ears, but she instead cuts you off

“Oh you must be the guest that I heard of, I was just coming to see if you were awake. Follow me, Lady Kaguya wanted to meet you and we have to get you presentable.”

[ ] Follow her quietly
[ ] Ask her what's going on
[ ] Ask what she means by 'presentable'
[ ] MOONWALK THE HELL OUT OF THERE.

[x] MOONWALK THE HELL OUT OF THERE.

FUCK YES

[x] Ask her what's going on
[x] Ask what she means by 'presentable'

[x] Ask her what's going on

[ x ] Ask what she means by 'presentable'

FUCK I KNEW IT. I FUCKING KNEW IT.
HOTGLUNONYMOUS IS A 300POUND SMELLY SWEATY FATFUCK.

[x] Ask what she means by 'presentable'
Fuck yes BATH TIME.
[x] Ask her if she will bath us.

[x] Ask what she means by 'presentable'
Fuck yes BATH TIME.
[x] Ask her if she will bathe us.

THIS LOOKS GOOD TO ME

[x] MOONWALK THE HELL OUT OF THERE.

>>406
Don't even joke about that. No, seriously - don't give Teruyo any ideas to that effect.

[X] Ask what she means by 'presentable'.

A bath? New clothes?

[x] MOONWALK THE HELL OUT OF THERE.

[x] Ask what she means by 'presentable'

“Wait a sec, what do you mean by presentable?” You ask her.

“Ah...well” Her gaze lowers for a moment, avoiding eye contact, “It's just that your current attire isn't exactly.... decent”. She blushes as she says 'decent'.

“...Huh?”

You take a look at yourself. You're still in the clothes you were wearing when you fell unconscious. Your pants are missing and you've got yellow blotches of dried 'glue' all over yourself.

'FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-' You curse in your head, you look like a total slob and/or sexfiend. The poor bunny must be disgusted at you, not to mention that acrid smell of god-knows-what.

[ ] Run away in embarrasment
[ ] Bashfully ask her to lead the way
[ ] GENUFLECT

[X] GENUFLECT

[x] Moonwalk away in embarrasment

I want my goddamn moonwalk

[x] Bashfully ask her to lead the way

Great, we just announced our presence in Eientei with a cloud of B.O. and hot glue stains. Unlimited Facepalm Works.

[x] GENUFLECT

[ ] GENUFLECT
ALL THE WAY

I'm gonna take a 20 minute break here, so post away and I'll write when I return

[X] Bashfully ask her to lead the way.

Must change into something decent, must find mirror and look at self.

Still hoping we're a trap, and still hoping we're forced to borrow Reisen's clothes.

>>416
Unlimited Hotglue Works.

[X] DOUBLE GENUFLECTION
ONLY OPTION FITTING FOR A MAN

[x] GENUFLECT

Only acceptable choice.

[x] Bashfully ask her to lead the way
Well, they DID pick one hell of a time to kidnap us.

>>424
Kidnap the NEET so Kaguya won't get lonely and has some company too.

[X] GENUFLECT

YOU KNOW IT TO BE TRUE

[X] GENUFLECT

[X] GENUFLECT

I HATE THIS ANON SO MUCH

Where is my moe Anonko?

[X] Hotglue Reisen.

>>413

HAHAHAHAHAHA. OH WOW.
THIS ANON IS THE WORST OF THE LOT.

[ x ] GENUFLECT

>>429
Don't like Hotglunonymous?
What's the matter, HITS TOO CLOSE TO HOME for you?

>>432

Dammit Anonymous. Srsly.
Being a NEET with a littered desk is fine, but not a hotglu shootan (fig) lover.

[X] GENUFLECT

You get down on your hands and knees and GENUFLECT with all your might. Reisen seems to be taken aback by your sudden action.

“Umm... well, uh....” You hear her stutter.

“The first condition has been cleared” You hear a voice whisper. “Great” you think “Now I'm hearing voices. Ah well, at least it's not as cliche as it being a repressed personality that kicks in when I'm in danger or whilst facing a monster.”

While you think of what other stereotypes you embody, Reisen recovers from her shock.

“Please get up and come with me, there's no need to be so formal.” She continues “Let's get you a change of clothes and be on our way to meet with Lady Kaguya.”

[ ] Agree, and follow her
[ ] Activate HAX and attempt to cut her lines (what could go wrong?)
[ ] Sob uncontrollably

>>433

I kind of like this anon.
A completely worthless bum who's only bobby is defacing figurines with a fresh coat.

He's the lowest of low
With nothing to loose, he'll make a reach for the heavens!

>>434
I see what you did there.
[X] Agree, and follow her

[x] Agree, and follow her
[x] I can strip here if you like

[x] Agree, and follow her

[X] Agree, and follow her.

Time to change.

[ ] Agree, and follow her
[ ] Allow manly tears to stream down your face.

[x] Sob uncontrollably

[x] Agree, and follow her

This anon may be a NEET, but that doesn't make him a puss.

>>435
Eirin Tonegawa?
Kaguya Chairman?

[ ] id follow you anywhere you say babeh

>>443
Anyone else think Mokou would make a good Kaiji?
"Kaguya, I'll make you crawl on the ground someday! Remember this! I'll win next time!"

[x] Agree, and follow her

You agree and follow her back into the room in which you came to in.

She produces two sets of clothing from one of the closets, a male kimono and a set of modern looking casual clothes.

“You can choose what you want to wear, they should both be around your size” She says whilst leaving the clothes on the table. “I'll wait outside while you get dressed.”

She starts to walk towards the door. You could ask her something before she leaves.

[ ] Ask her where she got the casual looking clothes
[ ] Ask her if you can't take a bath
[ ] Assault her

Second option after the question:

[ ] Put on the kimono
[ ] Put on the casual threads

[X] Ask her where she got the casual looking clothes
[X] Put on the casual threads

[X] Ask her if you can't take a bath.
[X] Put on the casual threads.

May be a figfag, but not that weeaboo.

[ ] Ask her if you can't take a bath
[ ] Put on the kimono

Unleash our inner weeaboo. Princess NEET may be entertained by our power levels.

[X] Ask her if you can't take a bath
[X] Put on the kimono

orz

[X] Put on red jacket with capsule emblem and red pants, then proceed to assault her... tenderly

[X] Ask her if she can get you a French dictionary.

[ ] Ask her if you can't take a bath
[ ] Horribly fuck up putting on the kimono

Don't care about the first (looks like bath is going to be picked), but

[X] Put on the kimono

IT'S LIKE I'M REALLY JAPANESE.

>>452
Lost?

[X] Ask her if you can't take a bath.
[X] Put on the casual threads.

No sense in going weeaboo when normal clothes would function in a superior slacking way.

[x] Ask her if you can't take a bath
[x] Put on the kimono

Japanese people wear kimonos.
...
Anon is Japanese.

[x] Ask her if you can't take a bath
[x] Put on the kimono
It's like seeing how much deeper I can dig myself into the weeaboo hole!

Do we acquire a Beam Katana when our weeaboo level becomes maximum?

>>459

Better yet, how about a 50 meter anti-ship class beam sword?

[X] Ask her if you can't take a bath.
[X] Put on the casual threads.

>>459
Our weaboo level is already maximum.

[X] Ask her if she can get you a French dictionary.
[x] Ask her if you can't take a bath
[x] Put on the kimono

You stop Reisen and ask her if she can get you a French dictionary. She looks at you with a blank look.
“HOW WOULD A MOON BUNNY KNOW WHAT AN FRENCH IS?” You think.

As she turns to leave, you ask another question;

“Hey shouldn't I take a bath or something?”

Reisen looks at you as if that's the smartest thing you've said all this while but then replies

“I'm sorry, but our bath is temporarily out of comission, it should be up and running by the end of the day. Now please go get dressed already.” She says and then walks out of the room.

After glancing at the two sets of clothing, you decide that the kimono would be better, after all there's an inner voice that seems to be saying “IT'S LIKE I'M REALLY JAPANESE.”.

You somehow manage to put the kimono on without much struggle, you figure that male kimonos are much simpler than female kimonos and make a mental note.

You call Reisen back in and seeing you dressed in those clothes, she remarks:

“Huh I would have thought the western style clothes would have suited you better, after all the research I did... Anyways, let's go see Lady Kaguya”

As you get ready to leave, you realize something important, you haven't even asked this girl her name!

[ ] Follow Reisen
[ ] Huh? 'Research'?
[ ] Ask her what her name is

>You stop Reisen and ask her if she can get you a French dictionary. She looks at you with a blank look.
You're useless, Reisen. USELESS.

[x] Huh? 'Research'?

[ ] Ask her what her name is

[X] Ask her what her name is.
[X] Ask her about her "research."

Spying on us already, dear?

[x] Follow Reisen
[x] Huh? 'Research'?
[x] Ask her what her name is

This wall must be built.

[x] Follow Reisen
[x] Ask her what her name is
[x] Ask about her 'research'

[ ] Follow Reisen
[ ] Huh? 'Research'?
[ ] Ask her what her name is

THIS IS SO SUGOI

I AM SO SUGOI

[ ] Follow Reisen
[ ] Huh? 'Research'?
[ ] Ask her what her name

[ ] Huh? 'Research'?

reeeeesseeeaaarrccchhh

>>469
^_______________________________________^

This Thread makes my weaboo level maximum

>>469
>>472
Fuck, now our weeaboo level is too high.
Not even Kaguya will want us now.

>>473

weeaboo not weaboo

[ ] Huh? 'Research'?
[ ] Ask her what her name is

[ ] Say goodbye.
[ ] Leave the dictionary in your room for now.

>>477

Stop that.

>>477
Cut that out. It was only funny the first time.

>>477
This one is for the SDM LA, don't count it in.

[x] Follow Reisen
[x] Huh? 'Research'?
[x] Ask her what her name is

You start following the moon rabbit and as the two are walking you try to engage her in conversation.

“So what did you mean by 'research' back there?” You ask her.

She pauses. “Oh that was nothing.” She starts blushing “I just thought that people from outside the border wore these types of clothes so I made that set thinking you'd be able to use it.”

Man, she MADE those? You suddenly feel like a prick for choosing the kimono.

“Damn you weeaboo tendencies!” You mutter under your breath.

Before she resume walking you quickly tell her that you haven't had the chance to introduce yourselves.

“Ah! Sorry, how discourteous of me! I totally forgot, please forgive me!” She says. “My name is Reisen, although my master calls me 'Undonge' and Lady Kaguya calls me 'Inaba'. What might your name be?”

PLEASE INPUT NAME
[ ] The undefeated in the East, Master Asia
[ ] Emiya. Emiya Shirou
[ ] Gregory
[ ] OTHER (Specify)

[ ] Emiya. Emiya Shirou

you lost me

[]Ready Knife
[]Disract your opponent by talking

[X] Watarase Jun

Still gunning for delicious trap-mode. If we ever figure out what we look like.

[X] anoNEET

[ ] "My name is Cu Chulainn, legendary Celtic hero. Are you my master?"

[x] Emiya. Emiya Shirou

[ ] My name is...Kamina

>>486
We already gave that name to the /youkai/ Anon.

[ ] Emiya. Emiya Shirou

Let's really weeaboo it up

>>486

We already have a gay bulger on /youkai/

[x] John Freeman, brother of Gordon Freeman.

[ ] My name is...Kamina

Yes, this

[ ] "Kamina. Who the hell do you think I am?"

[X] I am... we are... anonymous...
I am... we are... a legion...

I'm leaning to [ ] Emiya. Emiya Shirou since Shirou is pretty awesome, even though most disagree.

But damn if [x] John Freeman, brother of Gordon Freeman. isn't funny.

[ ] Emiya. Emiya Shirou
Trace on.

[x] Emiya. Emiya Shirou

youlostme.jpg

[ ] My name is...Kamina

Oh ho, why not? NEET princess will know better, she'll get a chuckle.

[ ] My name is Kamina Shirou.

[x] John Freeman, brother of Gordon Freeman.
IT'S TIME TO LIVE UP TO MY FAMILY NAME AND FACE FULL LIFE CONSEQUENCES

[x] "The name's Ash, housewares."

[ ] Emiya. Emiya Shirou

Lets see...

We got Shiki/Nanaya in /shrine/, Belmonymous in /sdm/, Captain Anonlock in /forest/ and Cu Chulainn in /youkai/...

Lets complete the set.

[x] Emiya. Emiya Shirou

Clueless Anon, go!

>>492
Gets me every time.
-------------------
"Emiya. Emiya Shirou" You tell her.

"Shirou, huh? Somehow it suits you. Follow me"*

You follow her through the seemingly endless corridors and finally stop infront of a door.

"Lady Kaguya is waiting for you" She says.

[ ] Attempt to ravage her
[ ] Knock and then go in
[ ] Moonwalk the hell out of there

*I'm not going to use weeaboo suffixes nor asian style last name calling, you guys have fagged this up enough.

[ ] Knock and then go in

[ ] Knock and then go in

[ ] Knock and then go in.
Lets meet out NEET.

[x] Knock then moonwalk the hell in there

[ ] Attempt to ravage her while you Moonwalk the hell out of there

[X] Knock and then moonwalk in while humming something by Michael Jackson.

We're smooth like that.

[X] knock, then moonwalk the hell in there

[x] Knock and then go in.

[ ] Knock and then moonwalk the hell in there

Cannot...resist...the moonwalk.

>>506
>>I'm a lazy faggot.

Fixed.

Jeez, you guys are doing it wrong.

[x] Knock and then go in.

[ ] Knock and then go in.

DRR DRR DRR

[X] Knock then moonwalk in while yelling HEEEHEEE! and throwing our hat

[X] Knock and then moonwalk in while humming something by Michael Jackson.

>>517
NO U.
------
[x] Knock and then go in

You knock on the door, wait for an acknowledgment and proceed inside. You attempt to moonwalk but then realize that such a complex move is best left to the king of pop. Inside is a room with a single table. There is another door opposite this one, whose door is slightly open, you think you can make out manga and various foodstuffs strewn around in that chamber, but you can't tell at this distance.

Sitting at the table, is a true vision of beauty, with her straight black her and her fair complexion, your breath is taken away at the mere sight of her. One cannot describe her in any other was than stating that she is truly a princess through and through. As you stand there with your mouth gaping open in astonishment, she motions for you to sit and proceeds to ask you if you want tea in the most exquisite and delicate voice, perfectly matched to her regal appearance.

“Would you like some tea?” She asks

As she pours some tea from a nearby kettle into a tea cup she resumes speaking,

“I assume you have many questions, not the least of which include who am I and where you are. I will answer these in due course, but first I must introduce myself. I am Kaguya Houraisan, and it is a pleasure to meet you.”

You sit there, still stunned by this gorgeous creature, when she pipes in again

“Pray tell, what is your name?”

Confirm Shirou (last chance)?
[ ] Yes
[ ] No

[ ] Knock and then go in.

Kaguya probably already thinks we're a retard. Why make it worse?

[ ] Yes

[ ] No
[ ] Kamina

[X] SHIROU IS NOT A WORTHY NAME TO MENTION IN THESE HOLDINGS. I INTRODUCE MYSELF BY THE NAME OF... PEDRO

[x] Yes

And if, by any chance, she comments on our name, I think we all know the appropriate response.

[ ] Yes

"My name is Shirou. Are you my master?"

[x] Yes
PleasedontsayyouplayedFSNpleasedontsayyouplayedFSN

[ ] Yes
CONFIRMING YES LIKE THE MOTHERFUCKING FIST OF THE NORTH STAR

[x] Yes

DO IT FAGGOT

>>530
"My name? What does that have to do with 'eff ess en'? You lost me."

[x] Yes

[ ] No

Emiya Kamina

[x] Yes

“My name is Emiya. Emiya Shirou.”

“Shirou, eh?” She flashes a knowing smile “I see what you did there.”

“You lost me.” You reply.

She continues “No matter, I wanted to say that I am the one responsable for bringing you here.”

You cock your head slightly to the side in an inquisitive fashion.

“I'm Teru-hime, and I've wanted to meet you for a long time. 'sup?”

[ ] Ask her how she brought you here
[ ] Brighten up at the mention of the handle of your pal and greet her enthusiastically
[ ] Ask her why she did it

YOU CAN CHOOSE ONLY 2.

[x] Greet her.
[x] Ask her how she brought you here.

[ ] Ask her how she brought you here
[ ] Brighten up at the mention of the handle of your pal and greet her enthusiastically

Bah, who cares why.

[x] Brighten up at the mention of the handle of your pal and greet her enthusiastically
[x] Ask her how she brought you here

[X] lol hay
[X] y u do dis

[X] lol hay
[X] y u do dis

...geekin' out.

[ ] Brighten up at the mention of the handle of your pal and greet her enthusiastically
[ ] Ask her why she did it

oh hey bitch why'd you kidnap me?

[x] Brighten up at the mention of the handle of your pal and greet her enthusiastically
[x] Ask her how she brought you here

[x] Brighten up at the mention of the handle of your pal and greet her enthusiastically
[x] Ask her why she did it

>>540
Changing to

[ ] Brighten up at the mention of the handle of your pal and greet her enthusiastically
[ ] Ask her how she brought you here

[ ] Y hallo thar
8 9 why y do this

[X] To find Flandre.

[X] Ask her how she brought you here.
[X] Brighten up at the mention of the handle of your pal and greet her enthusiastically.


Hey, alright.

[ ] Brighten up at the mention of the handle of your pal and greet her enthusiastically
[ ] Ask her why she did it
[ ] Post from another thread

>>551
[X] Roll back 1 post
[X] Sneak up on her and give her a surprise hug?

[x] Brighten up at the mention of the handle of your pal and greet her enthusiastically
[x] Ask her why she did it

Upon hearing your friend's handle you connect the dots and leap up enthusiastically, you close the distance and embrace Kaguya quickly. She seems taken aback, but doesn't resist. After a few moments you realize the embarrassing act you just committed and shrink back to your original position. Kaguya coughs slightly and seems to be blushing.

“I'm glad to see you too buddy” She adds.

“Why didja bring me here?” You ask her, as if you were two guys at a bar casually talking about your day.

“What's wrong with wanting to see a friend?” She asks.

“Nothing but, why now, and why in the way you did?” You reply.

“Ah well, I had this opportunity and I rarely get a break so I decided to use it..... well there's another reason....” She suddenly starts clamming up and stuttering. “I-I uhhh.... you.... “

Before she can finish her sentence a large beeping sound originates from the room in the back and she quickly gets up.

“I'm sorry, but this will have to wait until another time, I have to flame this week's episode of Gayass, that damn Spinzaku keeps messing everything up. You understand right? RAGE and such.”

You must have a weird expression on your face as she adds

“Feel free to ask Inaba to show you around, maybe meet some of the other residents. Talk to you later!”

She disappears into the room and the sound of furious typing can be heard. You sigh, finish your tea and walk out the room. In the hallway is Reisen. Seeing you, she smiles and asks you, “so where do you want to go?”

[ ] How about we go outside
[ ] Walk around the mansion
[ ] Go see Reisen's master

[ ] How about we go outside

Tewi!

[ ] Go see Reisen's master
NEEDLE TIME. No, but seriously, we need to do introductions.

[x] How about we go outside

Oh-ho, why not get killed by a random Mokou strafing?

[X] Walk around the mansion.

Need some Map Completion points.

[X] wanna show me the sights, bunnybabe?

[X] To explore the Mansion a little.

[x] Go see Reisen's master

[x] Go see Reisen's master

[ ] Go see Reisen's master

Hey Kohaku, what're you doing with those needles?

[x] Go see Reisen's master

see if we can find some chemicals to turn us into a delicious trap. NEET princess may enjoy that.

[ ] How about we go outside

Seeing as we have Reisen in MiG and Kaguya + Mouku in GA Tewi is the next on the list.

[ ] Go see Reisen's master

>>564
Relax, you'll have multiple chances to meet the folks at eientei over the next game week. What you need to watch out for are the secret flags~

>>553
[x] Join Kaguya and RAGE together

[x] Join Kaguya and RAGE together
Why not spend time with our NEET buddy.

[x] Join Kaguya and RAGE together
You motion Reisen to stop and run back into the room. You burst into the room where Kaguya is in, surprising her and you look at her with a burning intensity in your eyes.

"Wha-what is it? She meekly asks

"Let's combine our powers"

"Combine!?" She starts blushing. "Eeeek!" she yells as you grab her and bring her closer. She starts breathing heavily and her face is as red as a tomato.

"Kaguya, let's flame them together. Let's flame like no one has ever flamed before!"

"O-okay, if it's you I think I can" She replies.

That night the whole of the intertubes was astounded at the ferocity and speed the flames were being delivered. The passion behind the messages was so intense that half of the staff at sunrise resigned in shame, and the other half committed suicide.

Internet Good end GET.
-----
real post incoming, I just liked the way you think.

We need to shout out YES YOUR HIGHNESS! when Kaguya asks us to do shit.

>>570
Fuck yes, best end.

>>571
What a brilliant Idea, i am in for it.

>>570
Fucking awesome.

>>570
Fuck flaming we should've trolled. There is a difference.

[x] Go see Reisen's master

“Let's go meet you master, Reisen.” You say “Is that okay?”

She nods and quickly starts leading you down the long corridors. Suddenly you notice something that draws your attention, you see a silhouette coupled with a bit of noise just around the corner. It looks like someones there. You could probably stop and check it out before seeing Reisen's master. After all, there seems to be no rush and it's still morning/early afternoon as far as you can tell.

[ ] Check it out
[ ] No I must have my needletime now, come hell or high water

[x] No I must have my needletime now, come hell or high water

I want to receive Eirin's prick.

[x] No I must have my needletime now, come hell or high water

If it's Tewi, it's trickery. Best to meet her on our own terms.

[x] No I must have my needletime now, come hell or high water

[ ] No I must have my needletime now, come hell or high water
Fuck yes

>>578
ohoho~! Be careful what you wish for.

>>582

I know what I want.

[ ] Walk around the mansion

[ ] No I must have my needletime now, come hell or high water

[ ] No I must have my needletime now, come hell or high water

[ ] Check it out

No offense Teruyo but with all the hints about hidden flags and

>>After all, there seems to be no rush

this still feels rail roaded. Don't wana dampen your enthusiasm but this seems too easy modo.

>>587

A welcome change to Kira and YAF's despair and lunatic modo stories.

>>587
Hey, I don't wanna punish you guys, I'm letting you do as you please. No railroading whatsoever here, just letting you know that this is still the introduction phase, and you don't need to necessarily meet everyone right off the bat. Depending on when and where you meet them, you'll get different intertwining scenes. You won't get BAD ENDS for not meeting people.
--------
[x] No I must have my needletime now, come hell or high water

You decide that it's best to ignore the figure although an ominous voice in your head says that it was your second chance, and you screwed up. Surely, it didn't matter anyways?

You quicken your pace to keep up with Reisen, and arrive to what seems to be a waiting area. There's a sign that says 'Yagokoro Clinic' and a plethora of biohazard signs. You wonder if the natives understand the meaning of these symbols as you gulp at their meaning.

“That's odd, there seems to be nobody here” Reisen says “I'll go look around, wait here”

[ ] Wait obediently
[ ] Look around the waiting area
[ ] Run away

[x] Look around the waiting area

[X] Look around the waiting area

[X] Wait obediently

[X] Look around the waiting area.

Time to make like an RPG character and scoop up everything of value, and several obscure items that you wouldn't think have any practical purpose but actually do.

[ ] Look around the waiting area

[x] Look around the waiting area

Try not to make every missed opportunity look like we missed something critical to our success.

[ ] Loot the waiting area.

[X] Lurk around, sample the area, sniff, more probe tongue...

[x] Look around the waiting area

You look around, nothing but a few chairs, some simple ornaments and what seems to be an electric heater in the back. You probe some things with your tounge but truth be told, theres a reason those old lucasarts games stopped you from tasting everything.

[ ] Examine the chairs closer
[ ] Examine the heater
[ ] Maybe in the ceiling?

[X] Maybe in the ceiling?
NINJAS! Better get rid of them

[X] Maybe in the ceiling?

Climb higher!

[X] Examine the chairs closer

[X] Hide in the ceiling
Ambush them, no one lets Anon wait.

[x] Examine the heater

Electricity, in Gensokyo? Shenanigans!

[x] Maybe in that trap door I didn't notice until now?

[ ] Maybe in the ceiling?

CEILING CAT!

[X] Examine the chairs closer

>>603
Well, our resident NEET surely has internet access and a computer, so it shouldn't be that strange.

[X] Check underneath the house.
Works always.

>>603
They are Aliens.

[ ] Check underneath the house
Something tells you this is a bad idea and will only end in pain.

[x] Maybe in the ceiling?

You search the ceiling tiles for anything of use, besides a lot of dust and what seems to be an inordinate amount of asbestos (surely this is a building code violation!?) you can't spot anything. As you're about to give up you spot a dull silver object in a dusty place amongst the ceiling tiles.

You hear footsteps so you better hurry if you want to pocket it.

[ ] Pocket it
[ ] Don't pocket it

[X] DO IT FAGGOT!

[X] Pocket it

[X] Pocket it
haha, loot away everything you can get.

[x] Tickle her for massive damage

[x] Pocket it

[ ] Pocket it

>>607
>>609

I was kidding.

[x] Pocket it

You quickly grab the silver object and put it amongst your robes. It turns out that storing stuff in kimonos is hard. You hastily put the tiles in their place and try to look casual. Reisen walk back in with a beautiful woman with long silver hair and clear eyes. She's wearing a suit of alternating color with constellations embroidered onto it and a cap that resembles a nurse's cap.

“I'm back and I brought my master” Reisen says to you “Oh! Why are you so dusty”

You shrug and turn to the other woman.

“Eirin Yagokoro, pleased to meet you.”

[ ] Greet her back
[ ] Say something flattering (dice check)
[ ] Remain silent

[X] Say something flattering (dice check)

>>618
[X] Suggest to become her Test Subject.

[X] Oh yea, make her blush

[X] Greet her back

[ ] Greet her back

[ ] Greet her back

[ ] Say something flattering (dice check)

[ ] Greet her back
[ ] Say something flattering (dice check)

[x] Say something flattering (dice check)

[X] Greet her back
Women don't always respond well to kissing up, and it's probably going to hard to make someone like Eirin embarrassed, so I'm going to pussy out and just greet her normally.

[x] Greet her back
[x] Say something flattering (dice check)

Alright time for the dice check before I type out the next bit. First same two numbers win (and no higher/=/better) I'm using a list I have here.

oh I forgot, in the spirit of interactivity, gimmie a number between 5 and 10 (5 and 10 included).

[X] Greet her back
[X] Say something flattering (dice check)

[X] HACHI ROKU!

>>630
6!

[x] 7

C'mon lucky seven!

>>633
>>632
6 it is, writing now.

>>632
>[X] HACHI ROKU!

that equals 6? interesting

>>636
I thought:
Roku = 6
Hachi = 8

[x] Greet her back
[x] Say something flattering (dice check - success!)

“Hello there, I'm Shirou. It is truly a pleasure to meet the great sage from the moon, especially since you do well to promote the image that lunarians are both beautiful and sophisticated. Truly a fortunate meeting.”

Reisen and Eirin both look at you in shock for a moment, and then Eirin smiles a radiant mature smile, and looks at you with very seductive eyes.

"Ahh~ truly a refined woman" you think.

She begins to speak after a moment, “Indeed it is a fortunate meeting, it is rare to meet people who can spin words so eloquently such as you. Please come into my office.”

She motions you in and you enter what seems to be an examination room that doubles as an office. Charts and diagrams occupy every single centimeter of the wall.

“Please sit” Eirin says as she points to a chair “I would like to talk to you. Undonge, please bring our guest something to drink”

“Of course.” Reisen answers “What would you like to drink”

[ ]Coffee
[ ]Tea
[ ]Milk
[ ]Water
[ ]Nothing, thanks

>>637
Indeed it is, for simplicities sake I took it as a double vote, I wanted to move on since it's a simple chance thing.

[X] Strong Beer! Rest is poison!

[X] Water

[x]Tea

Real men drink it.

[x] Tea
DRUG IT. I DARE YOU.

[ ]Tea

Real man.

[x]Tea

Real men drink tea damnit

[ ]Tea

[X] Tea

“A cup of tea would be fine” You tell Reisen.

“Now then, I understand that you're Kaguya's guest.” Eirin starts to speak “I normally tell her to keep a low profile in case the moon wishes to track us down, but this time it would seem that she was much more stubborn than usual. Perhaps you're someone special to her?”

Eirin strikes a pensive though for an instant and then she carries on,

“Well no matter, what is done is done.” She concludes.

Reisen arrives with your cup of tea and hands it to you.

It would seem like you could ask Eirin a question now.

[ ] Ask her about Kaguya's obsession in bringing you here
[ ] Ask her about what she does
[ ] Ask if she knows anything about the mysterious figure you bought
[ ] Ask her about any recent ongoings in Gensokyo

[X] TEA, MOTHER FUCKER!

[ ] Ask her about what she does

[x] Ask her about Kaguya's obsession in bringing you here

[x] Ask her about Kaguya's obsession in bringing you here
[x] Ask her about what she does

[x] Ask her about Kaguya's obsession in bringing you here
How badly does she want to get in Hotgluenonymous's pants?

[x] Ask her about Kaguya's obsession in bringing you here

[X] Ma'am, yasee, this figureen i bought from the interbutts, and, whats the word 'n the street

[ ] Ask her about what she does

We should leave the figure out of conversation considering what we did to it.

[x] Ask her about Kaguya's obsession in bringing you here

>>656
You don't HAVE to mention the hotglue. At least not off the bat. Anyways asking about Kaguya's obsession won so I'm gonna start writing now. The figure conversation would have been... interesting to say the least.

>>660

Slowpoke! You're alive!

>>659
That reminds me, who was the figure of? Did we "hot glue" all over a fig of our NEET? Eirin? Delicious rabbit ears?

[x] Ask her about Kaguya's obsession in bringing you here

You take the pause in the convesation as an indication that you can speak and you decide to ask about Kaguya's obsession with bringing you here.

“I wouldn't call it an obsession, but it definitely was a strong sign of stubbornness on her part. As I said we're constantly on the vigil for any threats from the moon, so the last thing we want to do is to announce our presence to everybody looking. But Kaguya insisted on bringing you here partially because she acquired by chance an item that, upon my refinement, acted as a beacon of sorts outside the border and facilitated the retrieval of materials from the other side using sub atomic particles to generate a special muon-tachy----”

She stops when she sees your bewildered face. She smiles and continues her explaination.

“Of course, that is to say it was easier than usual to do it. Isn't that reason enough? I've known Kaguya for a long time, and she isn't one to develop attachments to mortals. Then again ever since the flow of time was restored to this manor, she has acquired certain pleasure in watching things grow and change. But enough of second guessing what goes through Kaguya's mind. Tell me, are you comfortable being here? Or do you wish to have never come here?”

[ ] Tell her that thus far it's been a fascinating experience
[ ] Tell her that you with you were home
[ ] Tell her that you can't make up your mind yet

>>656

>>considering what we did to it.

I didn't do shit, cap'n.

[ ] Tell her that thus far it's been a fascinating experience.

Feels good man.

[►] Tell her that you can't make up your mind yet

>>300lbsAnon requires an handjob

[X] Tell her that thus far it's been a fascinating experience

[ ] Tell her that thus far it's been a fascinating experience

Exposing ourself to Reisen = Awesome
Hugging Kaguya while radiating filth = Awesome
Getting cancer from the Asbestos ceiling = Awesome

[ ] Tell her that thus far it's been a fascinating experience

Why would you ever want to leave Eientei? Bunny girls, NEET, dangerous chemicals.

[ ] Tell her that thus far it's been a fascinating experience

[ ] Tell her that thus far it's been a fascinating experience.

[x] Tell her that I must be tripping balls, because I swear to god that girl has rabbit ears.

[ ] Grab Myon.

[X] Tell her that thus far it's been a fascinating experience
[X] Ask her if you can be her test subject

[x] Tell her that thus far it's been a fascinating experience

“Thus far it's been a fascinating experience.” You reply “It's truly wondrous to even be in Gensokyo, it is completely unlike any of my previous experiences.”

Hearing this, Eirin smiles at you.

“That's good to hear, I'm sure you'll see many more wondrous things in the upcoming days.” She says.

A part of you knows this statement to be true and you nod instinctively to her words.

You continue talking about various subjects with Eirin, including her production of many different drugs, and before you know it it's already late in the afternoon. Reisen, who had been standing by and refilling your tea, mentions that it'll be dinner time soon and Kaguya wants to eat with you. She leads you to your room and tells you the basic layout of the structure ands says that you should go to the dining room in a half an hour to eat.

Well, you're left alone and you've got some time to kill. What to do?

[ ] Examine the object retrieved earlier
[ ] Go to the bathroom (you should take a leak while you can all that tea went right through you)
[ ] Go to the front entrance
[ ] Wander around the halls

[x] Go to the bathroom (you should take a leak while you can all that tea went right through you)
[x] Examine the object retrieved earlier after taking said leak, while still in the bathroom.

[X] Examine the object retrieved earlier

[x] Examine the object retrieved earlier
[x] Go to the bathroom (you should take a leak while you can all that tea went right through you)

[X] go to bathroom, commence maintenance proceedures in self and on figurine, then dress and parfume to kill

[X] Wander around the halls
So when can we apply for being a test subject?

[X] Examine the object retrieved earlier
[X] Go to the bathroom (you should take a leak while you can all that tea went right through you)

Just examine it while on the can. It'll be more productive than reading the news.

[ ] Examine the object retrieved earlier
[ ] Go to the bathroom (you should take a leak while you can all that tea went right through you)

>>680
Any moment you get a majority vote.

>>683
I fear no one likes my idea.

[x] Examine the object retrieved earlier
[x] Go to the bathroom (you should take a leak while you can all that tea went right through you)

You decide to multi-task. After all, a true man can juggle man tasks at once, no? You head to the bathroom to relieve yourself when you run into your worst nightmare - the Japanese-style toilet. “For fuck's sake” you think to your self as you empty your bladder. You can't guarantee that you hit it all in that infernal contraption, but you did a good enough job. You wash you hands and then remove the small cylinder from your robes.

You immediately recognize what it is due to the shape and placement of the button on the side. You found yourself one of them fancy laser pointers. “Now I can terrorize small animals and point out bald dudes” You think as you grin slightly. You look at a nearby clock, you still have 20 or so minutes to go and could probably get away with doing one more thing.

[ ] Go to the front entrance
[ ] Wander around the halls

>>684
I want to be her test subject. As an avid fan of both Kohaku and Eirin, I support NEEDLE TIME.

[ ] Wander around the halls

>>686
Fuck yes, i am not the only one. Got to get some vote to be a test subject in somewhere.
[ ] Wander around the halls

[X] Status
[X] Stats
[X] Inventory

A sitrep, if you will.

also, [X] wander around the halls

[x] Wander around the halls

>>689
I'm afraid those aren't important in the story that much, at least not at the moment. Here goes anyways
------
Condition: Fine
Stats: Strength C, Intelligence (depends on the amount of alcohol ingested), Speed C+, Endurance B (but may fall to F during anemia attacks), percecption D (based on events that have transpired), Charisma B (ditto).
Inventory
1 x Male kimono
1 x Laser pointer (red)
1 x Hot glue gun

[ ] Wander around the halls

A sitrep would be nice.

[X] Use Hot glue gun on Reisen

[x] Wander around the halls

Feeling relieved, you decide that it'd be best to wander around the halls. You pick a random direction and start walking through the vast corridors. You wonder how they were able to fly through here in IN, but then again that isn't necessarily an exact account of the events that transpired.

Absorbed in thought you find that you wandered back towards Eirin's clinic. You're about to leave the waiting area and resume your wandering when you spot what seems to be a girl with a ribbon in her hair pacing back and forth. She hasn't seen you yet and there's no way to tell who it is without getting closer, the evening shadows obfuscate her figure.

[ ] Call out to girl
[ ] Run and tackle her
[ ] Run away

[X] Call out to girl.

Guessing it's Medicine.

[X] MOONWALK THE HELL OUT OF THERE.

Tackle is a win/win. Do it.

[ ] Call out to girl

[x] Call out to girl.

[X] Sneak up, SOLID SNAKE STYLE

[ ] Call out to girl

[ ] Call out to girl

Hopefully a good juncture will be given where we can apply to be a test subject, so we can have NEEDLE TIME from Kohak-- Er, from Eirin.

>>697
lol imma type this up for the lulz later.
--------------
[X] Call out to girl

You call out to the girl.

“Hey!”

Upon hearing your voice, she stops pacing around and comes near you.

“Who the hell are you and what do you want?” she snaps at you. “And where the hell is the doc?”

You can see that this young girl clearly now, she's dressed in what seems to be a shrine maiden outfit. You connect the dots. “OH FUCK” Your brain screams. Thank god you didn't tackle her otherwise it would have been a most... unpleasant experience to say the least.

“Well!?” The girl spurts out. “What do you have to say for yourself? GOD please don't be another idiot. That last guy showed up carrying a youkai and had the NERVE to tackle ME. I showed him, I splattered his guts all over the place, that bug also got what it had coming.”

[ ] Continue staring at her speechless
[ ] Introduce yourself
[ ] Smile and drool at her delicious armpits (LUNATIC MODE: Hot-glue her armpits)
[ ] Offer to help her find Eirin

[ ] Introduce yourself
[ ] Offer to help her find Eirin

[ ] Offer to help her find Eirin
Learn the lesson of the last anon and GTFO.

[ ] Offer to help her find Eirin

You might want to take it easy on the digs at the other VNs.

[ ] Introduce yourself
[ ] Offer to help her find Eirin

You just had to give us psychotic bitch Reimu didn't you?

[ ] Introduce yourself
[ ] Offer to help her find Eirin

maybe if we're polite, chado reimu wont turn us inside out

[X] Introduce yourself
[X] Offer to help her find Eirin.

Even if she is a bitch.

[X] Introduce yourself
[X] Offer to help her find Eirin

but you GOTTA do the "hot glue the armpits" one on the side.

[X] Introduce yourself
[X] Offer to help her find Eirin.

>>707
I don't think it's that big a deal if I mention in passing alternate events think of it as a metajoke. Introduce and offer to help find Eirin won writing now. Also bad end here:
[X] Run and tackle her

You move as swiftly as the wind. The target is but a few meters away.

She hasn't seen you yet. Good. You leap through the air and tale the petite form.

A cry of surprise comes forth. You've got her now you think. As you go for your blade to cut her lines, you realize you don't have a blade. “OH FUCK” you realize that you're exposed and have no way to defend yourself.

You scurry in attempt to find cover but it's too late. The girl has recovered and already two big red nails have perforated your body.

“Gah” You say while contorting in pain.

“What the fuck is wrong with you? You're the second worm to try this in one day, I guess you'll suffer the same fate as the first one.”

You try to plead for your life, but one of the nails perforated your lungs, and you can't speak. As you lay there gasping in a pool of your own blood, the last thing you see is the pissed off figure of Hakurei Reimu.

[ ] Hot-glue her armpits.

DO IT FAGGOTS

New thread, please? We're at 450ish replies.

[x] Introduce yourself
[x] Offer to help her find Eirin

“Uhh... my name is Shirou, would you like some help finding Eirin?” You state meekly.

“Well, never seen you here before, and it doesn't seem like she's here, so why the hell not? Take me to where she is.”

“Sure thing” you reply. “Hmm, isn't she supposed to introduce herself after I did? What's wrong with this girl?” You think while leading the way to where you last saw Eirin. Sure enough Eirin is still there, apparently doing some sort of paperwork.

You indicate to Reimu that Eirin is over there and start to go on your way.

As you start to leave Reimu says plainly “Oh yeah, I forgot to introduce myself, I'm Reimu, miko of the Hakurei shrine. Thanks, you weren't so useless after all.”

Despite her biting words you can tell that she meant well with her introduction. You look at a nearby clock and it's 2 minutes to the appointed time for dinner.

[ ] Go have dinner
[ ] Wander some more

>>715
Oh I hadn't noticed. Hold out a bit, since this day is almost over and then I'll stop for the night.

[ ] Go have dinner

[X] Go have dinner.

Dinner with NEET, it's a date!

>>713
Too bad we weren't manga Shiki, he could cut lines with his bare hands.

[ ] Go have dinner

[ ] Go have dinner

OM NOM NOM

[X] Go have dinner.

>>720
In the opening sequences of Tsukihime, he cuts apart the bed's lines with his fingers.

>>720
Manga Shiki was badass, especially since his nanaya mode kicked in frequently.
Dinner won. I'm gonna post in a new thread because that's just how I roll.

>>723
He uses a knife. He presses the lines with his fingers but can't reach into them.