You must be new here, old chap.
Like me give you a few hints:
-First, you don't put your email in the email field.
-Second, while I'm not sure about this, I'm fairly certain that "Like a BAUS" isn't gramatically correct.
-And third, if the picture is related, it would be absolutely trifling to say so before starting the story.

Have a nice day, old chap.

[X] LOOK AT ME I'M A GIANT ROBOT FROM OUTER SPACE!
-[X] Fire 2 proton shots in the air to announce your arrival

Oh man, a Cybran T2 destroyer in Gensokyo? This is a unexpected crossover, but funny. Can't wait to see the amount of destruction we are going to cause!

I'm afraid this thread will bring more Spacebattlers onto THP.

We all know how crazy they are with sci-fi or military stuff.

No need to be rude. This seems like an interesting idea. Also, the title is a joke, so its fine..

[x] Wash Up

Mainly because I'm interested in seeing where this option will go.

[X] Wash up. Dirt feels icky on the paintwork.


>>157627
>>Second, while I'm not sure about this, I'm fairly certain that "Like a BAUS" isn't gramatically correct.

Hartmann, if you don't understand something someone said, don't try to correct their grammar on it, because chances are it's a joke or reference to something that you don't get, and you are just drawing attention to that fact.

>>157631
Jokes travel so well over the Internet, yeah.

[x] Wash up. Dirt feels icky on the paintwork.

>>157629

They probably won't vote in this thread since they are only voting in Kahi's stories. Though, they are crazy with sci-fi and military stuff when they are debating.

P.S 8 writers joined the site last month. That's a lot

[X] LOOK AT ME I'M A GIANT ROBOT FROM OUTER SPACE!

Also apart from his little fandom Kahi/chibi reaper is rather disliked among spacebattlers

>>157634
The writer of this story is from that place, as this story idea was originally posted there. Oh, and >>157629 , you really need to stop spamming this site about how much you hate Kahi and spacebattles. Mainly because this is not the place for it, none of us care, and you've been told to knock it the fuck off earlier.

Do you not get that none of us fucking care, and that continually spamming about it makes us hate your fucking guts? You're a worse problem than the things you keep bitching about. Shut the fuck up already you mental midget reject. None of us fucking want to deal with your pathetic melodrama.

Cool it. The story doesn't even have double digit posts and the SB shitstorm has begun.

That said:
[X] Wash up. Dirt feels icky on the paintwork.

Trips are generated by writing #whateveryouwant in the name field

[X] Wash up. Dirt feels icky on the paintwork.

Got to look presentable in case guests come over. And if those guests turn out to be hostile, we certainly can't greet them with grime clogging up the firing ports.

>>157631
You're right, that joke is going over my head. Mainly because I don't remember any Supreme Commander unit called "BAUS", and also because I was too lazy to google it.
Also, I wasn't planning to post with my trip.

[x] Wash up. Dirt feels icky on the paintwork.

[X] Wash up. Dirt feels icky on the paintwork.
-[X] After that, full speed ahead! (SDM)
--[X] Once there: LOOK AT ME I'M A GIANT ROBOT FROM OUTER SPACE!
[X] If attacked at any point during this: RAZE EVERYTHING AROUND YOU TO THE GROUND!
- [X] Including the attacker too if possible.

[x] Wash up. Dirt feels icky on the paintwork.
Dirt feels yucky. Let's see if we can find a certain lake.

[x] Wash up. Dirt feels icky on the paintwork.

>>157640
All he said was spacebattlers love their sci-fi, no need to go ape-shit and act like an ass.

>>157634
Wait, 8 writers? You sure about that?

Let's see:
1. Viridian
2. Megasen
3. guyfrom/blue/
4. Rabbit
5. Dr. Gray
6. This guy
7. Human Divinity anon
8. Noner

Well, shit, you're right.

[ ] LOOK AT ME I'M A GIANT ROBOT FROM OUTER SPACE!

[x] LOOK AT ME I'M A GIANT ROBOT FROM OUTER SPACE!
->[x] Wash up. Dirt feels icky on the paintwork.

...How does a ship go about washing itself anyway? Do we just batten down the non-existant hatches and walk around on the lakebed?

>>157634
This talk of Mil. Sci-Fi has piqued my interest. Do you have a link to this thread?

Apologies for the double post by the way, not sure if it's a huge deal around here, but...

>>157691

Double-posting isn't a huge deal, but before you proceed any further, you may want to read this: >>gensokyo/6052

Also, proper etiquette around here is that you don't use a name and / or trip unless you're the author of a story, and even then only in your own threads (except in certain discussion threads). It's in the link I gave, but I'm giving you a heads-up now, since it's a common newbie mistake.

>>157693

Damn it. That should be >>/gensokyo/6052

>>157693
Okie dokie! Thanks!

>>157691

http://forums.spacebattles.com/

Check out the last three ones.

Check that debate forum and its sub-forum technical discussion. Those guys are calculating explosions and gunpower from pictures with all kinds of scientific crap. That's crazy!

>>157696
>debate forum
No, no, don't go in there.

It's full of retarded powerlevel discussions.

Unless you're talking about the other debate thread, in which you still shouldn't go there. Full of politics and religion debates.

First of all, you look ridiculous, covered in mud and dirt as you are. The obvious solution at hand would be to simply head for your natural habitat, and so you do. The lake is closer to an inland sea, and you gleefully pound towards it, stomping extra hard to shake more dirt off you. A girl in blue yelps as you walk by her hiding place in the reeds, nearly running her over.

"Sorry little girl." you call out and ride on. The clear water becomes muddied brown as fire suppressing systems begin to scrub you down with high pressure jets, an old trick of one of your buddies.

Washing yourself, you take a moment to sum up what you knew. You were either dead or dreaming. Not a single peep is audible by radio, quantum link, laser comms, or any other form of communications. Shouting out you were there was not something you were willing to try in unfamiliar territory, so it could be possible that the locals are simply in hiding, like the girl in blue. You make a mental note to try and get friendly with her as you spot her flying towards you wielding a giant snowball. On close examination weapons and repair systems seemed functional but felt messed with, as did all your sensors. No forms of beacon, GPS, or any other way of determining your-Wait.

The girl in blue was flying towards you wielding a giant snowball.

"Ice Sign ｢Icicle Fall」"

... What?

A ridiculous amount of slow moving bullets shoot out from the tiny body and begin to make their way towards you. Automatically your prow mounted CIWS begins to spin up as you prepare to intercept the barrage and the quad AA mount begins tracking the whatever the hell this thing truly is. That's an innocent little girl in the same way you're a cruise ship.

[ ] No kill like overkill.
[ ] Might want to try and leave something to interrogate afterwards. Might.
[ ] Launch smoke. You're not touching this madness with a ten foot pole.

Any constructive commentary about writing style or stuff is appreciated.

>>157627
Like a BAUS! was indeed meant as a joke. I'll use the normal spelling from now on if that's easier on the eyes, I'm still experimenting here. Thank you kindly for your help.

[X] No kill like overkill.

Shockingly-excessive force is the best deterrent.

>>157703
>Any constructive commentary about writing style or stuff is appreciated.

A couple I noticed off the bat:

>"Sorry little girl." you call out and ride on.
Should be:
>"Sorry, little girl," you call out and ride on.

First off, if the description following a quote includes a referent (something like "he said," "she cried," "the vicar exclaimed," etc.), then you link them with a comma instead of a period and leave the referent uncapitalized. An exclamation point or a question mark will override the comma, but that's the only thing that changes in that instance. This is explained in a little more detail here: >>/blue/10886

Also, direct address (i.e. the "little girl" in that quotation) is always set off from the rest of the sentence with commas.

>On close examination weapons and repair systems seemed functional
Should probably be:
>On close examination weapons and repair systems seem functional

You typically want to keep the overall tense consistent throughout a work. Since you don't seem to have too much trouble with tense overall, I'm guessing this one just slipped by -- which is why you should always double-check your first draft, just in case.

And finally, the vote:

[X] Might want to try and leave something to interrogate afterwards. Might.

We're in unfamiliar territory with no access to maps, GPS, or tactical networks. Intelligence gathering ought to be a high priority.

[x] Launch smoke. You're not touching this madness with a ten foot pole.

Destruction? What destruction? As far as I'm concerned, we're essentially a giant mechanical squid. Run away, little squiddie.

[X] Might want to try and leave something to interrogate afterwards. Might.

> On close examination weapons seemed functional but felt messed with...

God damn it, we can't cause wanton destruction. Our weapon systems can only use non-leathal danmaku shots. The most ammount of actual damage we would be able to do is if we rammed something. Still...

[X] Might want to try and leave something to interrogate afterwards. Might.
-[X] If not...
--[X] No kill like overkill.

[ ] Launch smoke. You're not touching this madness with a ten foot pole.

>>157703
Always happy to help. But seriously, putting your email in the mail field is a beginner's mistake.

>>157739
And a good way to get gay porn.

>>157703
>>157705

There's a difference between enforcing proper grammar and nitpicking. If someone starts writefriending like they're posting on a freeform forum RP for twelve year olds "u wake uup in a tavirn with many mens surounding u. they point sowords at yuo", then by all means, man the harpoons.

Stuff like this:


>"Sorry little girl." you call out and ride on.
Should be:
>"Sorry, little girl," you call out and ride on.

Well now, I pride myself on having legible and comprehensible posts, and I don't really see a problem here. So he missed a comma or two. Big deal. He got across what he was trying to say in a clear and concise manner. If this was an assignment for English 125, I'd tell him to fix that. But there's absolutely no point to making something Completely And Utterly Perfect And Flawless in average every day use such as this. Especially so on the internet.

I've probably made quite a few mistakes in this post, but does it really bother you that much? Can you understand what I'm trying to say? That's what really counts, not "Oh there needs to be a comma here!" or "Needs a semicolon". Pic related by the way.


Anyway, on with the vote.

A little girl has fired a large amount of bullets at me. Firing a large amount of projectiles at someone is generally a hostile action.
[x] No kill like overkill.
-Wait a minute. I am in unfamiliar territory, all comms are dark, and I have sighted no known forces. Furthermore, the fact that I was previously a hill suggests that I have been inactive for some time.
-[x] Might want to try and leave something to interrogate afterwards. Might.
--[x] Are my main guns dual purpose? If so, load Anti-Air ammunition. Nothing swats flies like 200mm magnetically-propelled rocket-assisted proximity-fused shrapnel shells.

>>157759
>there's absolutely no point to making something Completely And Utterly Perfect And Flawless in average every day use such as this.
Except it's not average every day use. It's a story being written. Why is it okay to ignore some grammar and writing rules and not others? Where do you draw the line?

>Can you understand what I'm trying to say? That's what really counts
I can understand "u wake uup in a tavirn with many mens surounding u. they point sowords at yuo" too, does that mean it's okay?

>>157759
He asked, so I offered help in good faith. If you think that's "nitpicking," then that's your problem.

Still, I'll keep my mouth shut unless he asks again, since I don't want to clutter this thread with a pointless debate over this.

>>157759
I can really do nothing but point to the points made in >>157763 and >>157765. They're very good points and you should listen to them. Especially the one about him having ASKED FOR IT, YOU NUMBSKULL.

[x] No kill like overkill.
We can figure out where we are later.

[x] Launch smoke. You're not touching this madness with a ten foot pole.

Shit like this can't hurt us, anyways. No matter how strange they are, they're just scared. We'll only kill if there's no reasoning done by any locals.

>>157759
Oh please, stuff like that is basic if you want to write a story.

[x] Might want to try and leave something to interrogate afterwards. Might.

Best way to get information is to ask someone.

OP here, let me clarify a few things.

I like having a grammar nazi on board. English is my second language, and one that has been slowly deteriorating over time, so I prefer having any misconceptions nipped in the bud before my grasp of the language is completely lost.

Somewhat more story related, although you are at the helm of the Salem's distant ancestor, this does not mean the two vessels are exactly alike. There are two major differences that should have been obvious from the story posts already but I feel they bear repeating.

It's piloted. You are a human cyborg sitting in the centre of the vessel controlling it via implants. It's quite possible to get out and explore nooks and crannies without blowing them to bits first.

Second are two small turrets, forward and aft, that serve as Close In Weapon Systems or CIWS for short, similar to Goalkeeper or Phalanx of today. For the lazy anon: Two guns that use bullet spam to shoot down incoming missiles. For the rest armaments are virtually identical.

Writing update now, please wait warmly etc. etc. Sageing just to see if it works

>>All he said was spacebattlers love their sci-fi, no need to go ape-shit and act like an ass.
>>I'm afraid this thread will bring more Spacebattlers onto THP.
ಠ_ಠ

Resisting the temptation to flatten the girl and half the surrounding countryside straight away, you hold fire on the AA cannons for now and opt to weather the storm with both your armour and CIWS. In the meantime you try to reason with the girl and activate your external speakers.

"I said sorry!" you shout.

"So? You nearly stepped on me you big meanie!" she shouts back. Impressive set of lungs there. You're back-pedalling rapidly, waiting for holes in the pattern to become big enough for you to slip through. So far, no luck, but you're confident you can outrun the things, at least, until you hit land.

"It was an accident!" you reply. Well, you were a front-line combatant for a reason. Diplomacy, unless done with big guns, was never your strong suit.

You made the mistake of slowing down too much, and several bullets come in from the side, catching you off guard. The gatling gun on your prow roars to life, spewing a deadly barrage of... Glowy stuff? Spiralling out in a large, flower-like pattern from the spinning barrels are balls of yellow light. Intricate, beautiful and totally not supposed to be there. You're barely aware of impact warnings as the blue bullets begin to hammer home, staring in uncomprehending fascination at the pattern you're putting out. Your bullets actually outnumber the ones of the blue girl, and she's forced to weave through the barrage. Slowly drifting to a halt, you become aware that although annoying, the blue bullets did little more than freeze the paint off your hull. There's also an indicator of 'HP' that seems to have decreased somewhat, but where the hydraulic pressure is lost isn't clear to you. Not that there is anything that is clear to you at the moment.

"Habbahuh," you manage to utter. No, no that doesn't sound quite right.

"Awazdaz?" you try again. Nope, still not quite there.

"WHAT THE BLINKING CHRISTMAS LIGHTS IS GOING ON?!?!" you exclaim finally. Meh, close enough. The girl seems to be winding up for another barrage, but you're having none of it.

"NOPE. ERROR. ILLEGAL OPERATION!" you shout as you turn to face her directly. The water behind you churns as your mighty engines heave to accelerate you forward.

"h-Hey! What do you think you're doing?" she shouts, her courage faltering as you approach ramming speed. Then she floats up and over your form. Clever girl, but not clever enough.

"SOCCER!" you shout back. A metal leg reaches up aft of you, and nails the girl directly in the face. Giving your enemy 'the boot' as it's called is not an encouraged practice in the Cybran army, but it sure helps blow off steam. The tiny form slowly slides off the limb, drops into the water and stays there, out cold. Another bit of tricky manoeuvring with your legs later, the drenched figure is deposited on your forecastle. You can see a small trickle of blood coming from her nose, and all talk of toughness aside, what's left of your conscience won't let you leave the girl just lying there.

[ ] Man up. She started shooting, so she better explain herself first.
[ ] It's a small girl. Resistance to her cuteness is futile.

Regardless of helping or not,

[ ] Get out and show your face (and your shotgun just to be sure).
[ ] Pretend to be a giant alien robot squid.

[x] It's a small girl. Resistance to her cuteness is futile.
[x] Pretend to be a giant alien robot squid.

This option. It was made for me.

I can tell this story needs work but have no idea how to make it better. Annoying.

>>157829
It's doubly annoying when you have that and you're the actual author of the story.

[X] Man up. She started shooting, so she better explain herself first.
[X] Pretend to be a giant alien robot squid.

[x] It's a small girl. Resistance to her cuteness is futile.
[x] Pretend to be a giant alien robot squid.

[X] It's a small girl. Resistance to her cuteness is futile.
[X] Pretend to be a giant alien robot squid.

[x] Man up. She started shooting, so she better explain herself first.
[x] Pretend to be a giant alien robot squid.

[x] Man up. She started shooting, so she better explain herself first.
[x] Pretend to be a giant alien robot squid.

Split though we are on whether to be nice or not, it seems we all agree on hamming it up.

But of course, Ham is a required diet in any story.

[x] Man up. She started shooting, so she better explain herself first.
[x] Pretend to be a giant alien robot squid.

The "cuteness" option was tempting, but.. Well, at least e fished her out of the water.
Being a giant alien robot squid is a no-brainer, though.

[x] Man up. She started shooting, so she better explain herself first.
[x] Pretend to be a giant alien robot squid.

[X] Man up. She started shooting, so she better explain herself first.
[X] Pretend to be a giant alien robot squid.

Nobody must know the shame of your human form.

>>157900
I don't know what's the writefag's interpretation, but those destroyers are entirely automated.
Don't go near the Youkai Mountain, else the kappas will tear you into pieces.

[x] Man up. She started shooting, so she better explain herself first.
[x] Pretend to be a giant alien robot squid.

>>157902

Yeah, every constructable unit in the Supreme Commander universe is, but it's funnier this way.

Also, "automated" doesn't necessarily mean "unintelligent", although you may have ended up thinking this after your forces marched to their doom.

>>157904
I never said it was dumb. I was just worried that people could vote thinking that there was someone in the machine. I also want Anon to be scared of everything living in the water. And also Iku and Tojiko.

But if I remember right, in the first game, you could keep playing even after your commander's death, so maybe it's the case here. Or maybe the commander's memory was saved on the destroyer. Or maybe it grew to achieve sentience on its own.

Supreme Commander 2 is fun, yeah, but it's not as fun as the first one. I miss having a shitload of differents units, moving a scout near the enemy base, loading my transports my T1 bots, and stuff.

Wish this were Aeon instead.

It's my favorite faction.

Besides, giant robots.

>>157902

Please read

>>157821

Should I post with trip next time?

More relevant and something I forgot last post: Vote called, writing now. Apologies for double post.

>>157922
Posting with your name in your thread isn't namefagging.

Although occasionally you could get called out on it. And then it's hilarious.

You should probably do it in the interests of understandability.

>>157922

Your story thread: always name and trip. Only sage for the most offbeat posts, since most of your posts should be story related and therefore important.

Not your story thread: never name and trip. Sage anything that isn't a vote or very relevant story discussion.

Non-story thread (see /blue/): sometimes name and trip. This is a judgment call as to whether or not you want to be held accountable for a post. Saging is generally not needed.

This tl;dr should be of use. Hope it clears things up for you.

You are now speaking in Harbinger's voice.

----

[x] Man up. She started shooting, so she better explain herself first.
[x] Pretend to be a giant alien robot squid.

Cute looks or not, she still decided it was happy hunting season for your hide for whatever reason, and you decide to wait what she has to say for herself before you administer any aid. Someone who has the balls or lack of brains to attack what is esentially a walking, talking battleship with no visible weapons should be approached with caution. That's before you count the wing-like protrusions on her back, another sure sign something is screwed up with her. Fashion statements don't usually confer negative temperature values to their owner.

For the same reason you decide to remain in your solid shell, just in case she starts blasting as soon as she wakes up. Added bonus is the intimidating 'I can reconstitute you into component atoms' look provided by naval grade cannons pointing in her general direction. Not that you're stupid enough to blast your own prow off, but she doesn't need to know that. You'd only start shooting if she somehow managed to slip away from under your front legs, which loom over her head for yet more intimidation brownie points.

"Mughu..."

Ah, the guest of honour awakens.

"Guestovwha?" she asks, slowly picking herself up.

Whoops. You didn't mean to say that out loud. Makes you sound too much like a cliché villain.

"Awaken child." you begin. She's still not completely there if the way her eyes are out of focus is any indication. Oddly enough, her nose appears to be completely fine.

"I SAID AWAKEN!"

The loud noise makes her jump up, straight into the legs overhead. With a resounding smack, she's out cold again. Moving the legs a bit, you wait patiently for diplomacy attempt number three.

"Ah, huge frog..." she mutters as she wakes again. Perhaps you did brain damage? Whoops. Oh well, here goes.

"Arise from your slumber. There are important matters to attend to, little one." you say.

"Wha! You're the big meanie!" the girl responds, jumping up and pointing at you accusingly. Then she grabs her head, in pain. You recognise the symptoms easily.

"You have a concussion. Move slowly." you advise. "Severe brain damage can result if care is not taken. Even minor movement will cause intense pain."

"You can't say what I gotta do." she says defiantly, "Who do you take me for? I'm Cirno, Strongest in Gensokyo! I-owowow" she whimpers, nursing her skull.

"You will answer my questions. Where is this 'Gensokyo'? Who are you? Which side do you belong to?" you reply, moving your legs slightly closer. Cirno conjures an ice pack out of thin air and secures it on her head with her ribbon.

"Ah, better." she murmurs, "You're not very bright are you? I already told you, I'm Cirno the strongest of all! I'm my own side."

"Gensokyo?" you inquire further, filing the other tid-bits under 'nonsense'.

"Here, stupid. Come on, a youkai who doesn't know where he is?" she says.

"... Youkai?" you ask. She gives you a look as if she's seeing water burn. Then she breaks into a brilliant smile.

"You're from the outside! You're lucky you ran into someone as forgiving as me, bully, I'll show you around, but first," she eyes you critically, "get rid of that voice like you're hiding in a tin can."

"I... can't. There's an icicle stuck in the speakers." you admit. "Also, what's this 'outside' you speak of?"

Although the explanation about Gensokyo that follows is somewhat childish at times, you get the gist of it. Cirno doesn't know either wherever the hell you are. Well, or you take at face value that she is an ice fairy who lives in a magical wonderland where all the residents of fairy tales reside because the outside world became too dangerous or something. Regardless, the offer to get shown around still stands.

[ ] take it (where?)
- [ ] Continue 'interrogating' Cirno
- [ ] Figure out what the other guns do
[ ] leave it
- [ ] Explore alone (where?)
- [ ] Figure out what the other guns do
- [ ] Something else (write in)

[x] Take it (Hakurei Shrine)
-[x] Figure out what the other guns do.
--[x] Do the figuring out in a direction other than Cirno's.

I'm assuming we have urgent war buisness of some kind or another that we need to get back to, so we should be heading to the shrine.

[X] Take it (Hakurei Shrine)
-[X] Figure out what the other guns do.
--[X] Do the figuring out in a direction other than Cirno's.

Why hello Reimu! Mind if we test out our weapons in your general direction?

> You are now speaking in Harbinger's voice.

We are now required to ASSUME DIRECT CONTROL.

[x] Take it (Buddhist shrine)
-[x] Figure out what the other guns do.
--[x] Do the figuring out in a direction other than Cirno's.

[X] Take it (Hakurei Shrine)
-[X] Figure out what the other guns do.
--[X] Do the figuring out in a direction other than Cirno's.

What could possibly go wrong?

>>157905
Why Iku and Tojiko precisely? I would understand Murasa (hell, I got plans for her), but the envoy of the Dragon Palace and a ghost?

Poll still open.

>>158069
Because Iku uses thunder in SWR, and Tojiko's power is "ability to the extent of causing lightning".
And in my mind, machine + electricity = smoke everywhere + broken machine.

[x] Take it (Buddhist shrine)
-[x] Figure out what the other guns do.
--[x] Do the figuring out in a direction other than Cirno's.

Call it bandwagoning but I like the logic behind this vote.

>>158076

>ability to the extent of

I want you to read this phrase to me and tell me if there's any meaning that's lost if you simply say "ability to".

The English language thanks you.

>>158077
The wiki used it, and since I hate them, I keep using it, so that I can say "but the wiki uses it".

>>158076

Ah. Heard of a Cage of Faraday? Google it. Plus you're proofed against EMP that can microwave birds clean out of the sky at three hundred kilometres out if turned up to full power.

Believe me, when it comes to Touhous, lightning is the very least of your concerns.

>>158084
Just got Forged Alliance.
Units from this game can't regen damage, so let's be careful.

>>158078
So your use of it can be summarized as "Trolling". Yeah, stop doing that.

>>158087
I would not be too worried about that.

Vote closed. Writing.

[ x ] take it (Hakurei Shrine)
- [ x ] Figure out what the other guns do
-- [ x ] Do the figuring out in a direction other than Cirno's


The talk about the 'border' is confusing, but it gives you someplace to start. If this really is some form of pocket dimension, there would be evidence of it there. When you inquire about it, Cirno shrugs.

"You got to get to Reimu for more about the border. It's pretty close, follow me!" she says, darting upwards. Idly you gun your engines, mulling about something else that's been bothering you. The gatling gun on your prow sits there innocently, but still it didn't function the way it should have. Worse, it looks like whatever did a number on it also affected all your other weapons. Heavy armour aside, you feel vulnerable without your most trusted systems functional. Well, sort of functional, although you're not sure how the admittedly quite beautiful flower pattern would deflect incoming missiles. A thought strikes you. Cirno is babbling about Reimu in the meantime, but you interrupt the ice fairy.

"Oy, Cirno? You mind sitting down for a sec?" you ask.

"Why?"

"Well, remember that flashy light show I shot at you? My gun is not supposed to do that." you explain. She looks at you puzzled.

"That means...?" she says.

"That means I want to see what my other weapons do, and since I don't know what's going to happen I thought it would be a good idea to get you out of the way." you explain, the quad-barrel electron autocannon directing it's attention skywards.Shrugging, the fairy complies.

"It's more fun if you have someone to shoot at." she says, sitting down on your rear deck. Too bad you're already stomping over dry land, you wanted to start with torpedo's first.

"I totally agree, but you're the only one nearby right now. Those butterflies don't count." you reply.

Whatever Cirno's reply is is drowned out by the roar of your AA battery coming to life. The results are nothing special compared to the barrage of your CIWS, they look like ordinary shots that only arc out a bit. Disappointing really, you'd hoped for something more useful than reduced accuracy.

Then they explode. Into perfect spheres of bullets. Not just once, to your delight the bullet spam keeps on going as long juice is available in the capacitors. On top of that, you notice the bullets don't even harm you, instead passing straight through your form, covering even your rear if Cirno's surprised shout is anything to go by. Whoops. You cut power and to your relief the attack stops immediately. The surrounding field has been reduced to a crater filled mess, and the ice fairy is currently in cover behind a small rock.

"... Cirno, you okay?" you call out, "I didn't know it would do that, sorry."

"I-I'm fine!" she says as she floats up again. "Still, don't just fire attacks like that wildly! You nearly hit me"

"It was only a test. Look, if it makes any difference- What the hell are those?" You stop and stare at what you mistook for butterflies moments earlier. They're actually small humanoids with butterfly wings, and right now they're headed directly towards you.

"Eh? They're normal fairies. They get attracted by flashy lights, makes 'em think you wanna play with 'em. Just use your danmaku on them." Cirno says, and gives you a sharp look. "Not the one you just used though!"

"Okay, I won't." you promise. The quad AA goes back to resting position while the dual Proton Guns line up. You're hardly surprised by the fact the targeting lasers now red death rays and you sweep them from side to side. Even grazing shots are enough to make the tiny fairies explode into puffs of light. The stripe pattern is enhanced by small globules of white light that begin to gather in front of your main barrels. You can see fairies beginning to break away, trying to dodge the attack. Too late. Two beams of raw and barely contained power shine forth, accompanied by a thundering boom. The incoming fairy cloud simply disappears under the onslaught. Not slowed down in the slightest, the beams continue on gauging a massive ditch into the earth continuing back towards the lake. Water hisses and boils, adding more vapour to the already saturated air. You can't help but laugh as the rain-cloud you created rises into the air and begins to shed water.

"Fuck yeah! Awesome!" you holler. Cirno merely huffs as she sits down on your prow.

"Show off."

"Sorry, I can't hear you over sound of my huge laser charging." you reply.

"Again?!"

"Why not? I gotta run multiple test to be completely sure what my weapons are capable of. Plus, there are more fairies incoming."

"So why do you have to use the big beam?"

"Better question would be-"

FFWHOOOAM

"-why not?"

"Because that way you never learn to control your basic patterns better, relying too much on a single attack to carry the day for you. That's just calling for someone to figure out how to beat that and you'll inevitably become weaker and weaker." Cirno says with arms crossed. You nearly stumble as you process what she just said.

"That's. Wow, that's mature stuff right there." you say, and Cirno visibly swells, wings fluttering.

"Who're you quoting?"

The girl drops down on your forecastle, and you almost feel bad for her. Almost.

"Keine the teacher." Cirno mutters.

"Eh, don't feel too bad. Passing on wisdom is wisdom in itself." you say. Cirno looks up confused before breaking into a smile.

"Now in the meantime, I'mma charging mah lasor!"

"..."

----

The trip continues fairly uneventful, if explosive. You actually manage to get the AA to behave like a sort of remotely detonated flak, but the timing remains tricky. Little progress is made with the CIWS or the cannons however, despite repeated (and enthusiastic) test fire. After one of these test you spot a figure falling from out of the sky off your port side. Err. Whoops?

[ ] Ignore it, not as if there's going to be anything left but a red stain.
[ ] Even red stains need respect paid to them. Come clean to the red stain.
[ ] Bury the red stain, pretend you weren't shooting like a drunk redneck.

[X] Even red stains need respect paid to them. Come clean to the red stain.

>Who are you quoting

I can't take it easy like this.

Is it normal to find half a dozen mistakes after posting even though you proofread?

>>158155

Yes. All the time. If you don't, that's unusual.

Join the Regretful Writefags club, mate. It's quite lively in here.

[X] Even red stains need respect paid to them. Come clean to the red stain.

A cyber-officer and a gentleman.

Lest I forget again: The image supposed to head this update ladies and gentlemen.

>>158154

It is shortened because that is the accent of the character. Aside from that I believe it is grammatically correct.

>>158164
No, it isn't a grammar issue. Its a stupid /jp/ meme that I swore you were referencing. I suppose not. Carry on!

[x] Even red stains need respect paid to them. Come clean to the red stain.

Whoever it was, we should pick them up too. More touhous = better.

[x] Even red stains need respect paid to them. Come clean to the red stain.
-[x] Stop shooting your guns like a drunk redneck.

[x] Even red stains need respect paid to them. Come clean to the red stain.
-[x] Stop shooting your guns like a drunk redneck.

[X] Ignore it, not as if there's going to be anything left but a red stain.

>>158151
[x] Even red stains need respect paid to them. Come clean to the red stain.
-[x] Stop shooting your guns like a drunk redneck.

[x] Even red stains need respect paid to them. Come clean to the red stain.
-[x] Stop shooting your guns like a drunk redneck.

[x] Even red stains need respect paid to them. Come clean to the red stain.
-[x] Stop shooting your guns like a drunk redneck.

You shot someone.

Seeing the figure falling down you can't help but wonder what the hell that person was doing at several thousand feet above you. Then the reality of what you just did slowly begins to hammer home.

You shot someone.

Not a military target like a bot or even a manned unit, you shot a random passer-by because you forgot one of the most basic rules of gun control. Check. Your. Target. Just because there were no signs of planes or any other signs of airborne industry does not mean the skies are automatically clear of targets. Cirno demonstrated earlier for crying out loud.

Adjusting your sensors to no longer filter out biological fliers, you do a double take at the amount of traffic you're suddenly picking up. Most of it fortunately seems to centre around the mountain and the smoke plume, but holy balls. Holy balls, you were firing your guns at what has to amount to the local highways!

The idea of pretending nothing has happened comes up but you dismiss it out of hand. You stand by your principles, the war taught you the value of them. One of your principles was taking responsibility.

Trees the width of a man snap like matchsticks as you turn.

"Cirno. We're making a detour." you announce solemnly.

"What? Why?" the fairy inquires, stopping her tale of her 'heroic struggle against the monster frog' or something.

You decide to tell her the truth. She just looks at you confused.

"So? It's only danmaku. The rules don't allow bad stuff to happen."

"... Someone just dropped several thousand feet with nothing but the clothes on her back. I'm sure he or she is just fine." you say sarcastically, unsure how else to respond. Is the situation getting through to her at all?!

New contact, dead ahead, bearing straight towards you. Speedy, at least Mach 3, slowing down.

"Cirno, get behind me. I see something." you say, your sudden business like tone convincing her to obey. A girl with black hair and matching skirt, white shirt and raven wings is weaving through the forest towards you, too fast to see by standard human eyes. The approaching girl has pulled out a device of sorts, and you brace for impact while doing your best to identify it. A camera?

Whatever, the girl is now close enough to hear you. You assume direct control of your weapons and take aim. She stops behind a tree.

"Hello there, can I help you?" you ask loudly. She manages to hide her surprise quite well.

"Aya Sheimaru, tengu reporter! Um, I'd like to ask you a few questions if possible." she says, smiling nervously as she steps into view.

"Not right now. I have a burial to attend to." you answer.

"Oh, whose? What for?" she asks, camera swapped for a notepad and pen.

"I don't know, but whomever it is... Well, I was trying out my full capabilities when I accidentally hit a passer-by several thousand feet up. I can't just stand by and pretend they never existed you know?"

"Really? I didn't see anyone going down during my dive."

Something clicks in your mind, and you compare the images from the falling person with this Aya figure. 99.6% match.

"What the- I thought I shot you!" you exclaim, relief flooding through you. Aya gives you a confused look.

"Um, no you didn't?"

"Oh thank god. Then... Holy shit, I thought I accidentally killed someone."

"Well, you can make it up by giving me an interview. Who are you, where are you from, what are you?"

"Er..." you reply. Good lord, you knew what the term 'mood whiplash' meant but you never really experienced it until now. Befuddled, you let Aya continue to interview you as you approach your destination. You are tight lipped, letting slip only one real important detail about yourself.

[ ] Your reliance on technology to survive.
[ ] Your insecurities about your weapons.
[ ] Your pressing need for a hangar for maintenance and repairs.

(pick one)

Now you are upon the Hakurei Shrine itself, you face an obstacle. There is a decorative wall and gate surrounding the complex and you can't get in without breaking something, not to mention what your feet would do to the well maintained garden. You pointedly do not look at the ruins of the forest you've just bulldozed through. Is that a bird nest in your mast?

[ ] This seems like the perfect time to test the mist horn.
[ ] Deploy the attack drones! Or seeing as you don't have any, Aya and Cirno. Have them prepare the locals for what you look like.
[ ] Park the ship, get out and knock on the door in person. Look all friendly and unassuming. Something about walking softly and big sticks and all that.

----

It's not fun when your computer dies taking all your notes with it. Took me a while to salvage the bits and pieces of the hard drive. Still missing my pictures, but have an update.

Welcome back! I really missed your story!

[X] Your pressing need for a hangar for maintenance and repairs.

Kinda obvious, really. Need to get in good with the kappa.

[X] This seems like the perfect time to test the mist horn.

Entertainment purposes. Nothing more.

[x] Your insecurities about your weapons.
Because this will lead to KAPPA UPGRADES, I am sure of it.
Also
[x] This seems like the perfect time to test the mist horn.
Because Reimu will find some way to hate us, we may as well give her a simple, obvious reason to save her time figuring it out.

[X] Your pressing need for a hangar for maintenance and repairs.

Another way to get Kappa upgrades. And it keeps our priorities straight.

[X] This seems like the perfect time to test the mist horn.

It's a shame we aren't a builder/engineer. Being able to have little drones to do things with would have been awesome.

[X] Your insecurities about your weapons.

We need bigger ones. And more of them.

[X] This seems like the perfect time to test the mist horn.

Speaks like a Reaper, check. Sounds like a Reaper, check.

[X] Your pressing need for a hangar for maintenance and repairs.
[X] This seems like the perfect time to test the mist horn.

GOOD MORNING GENSOKYO!

[X] Your pressing need for a hangar for maintenance and repairs.
[X] This seems like the perfect time to test the mist horn.

Was there any other possible choice?

[x] Your pressing need for a hangar for maintenance and repairs.
[x] This seems like the perfect time to test the mist horn.

We will never disembark; we must forever remain the huge, ungainly outsider robot! If the Kappa get ahold of us, though, they might figure out that there's a man inside this machine.

[X] Your pressing need for a hangar for maintenance and repairs.

[X] This seems like the perfect time to test the mist horn.

[x] Your pressing need for a hangar for maintenance and repairs.
[x] This seems like the perfect time to test the mist horn.

[X] Your insecurities about your weapons.
[X] This seems like the perfect time to test the mist horn.

We need moar dakka to match the residents of Gensokyo.

[X] Your insecurities about your weapons.
[X] This seems like the perfect time to test the mist horn.

HONK

[x] Your insecurities about your weapons

and

[x] This seems like the perfect time to try out the mist horn.

HONK HONK. IMMA TONK.

[X] Your pressing need for a hangar for maintenance and repairs.
[X] This seems like the perfect time to test the mist horn.

[X] Your insecurities about your weapons.
[X] This seems like the perfect time to test the mist horn.

[X] Your pressing need for a hangar for maintenance and repairs.

Kinda obvious, really. Need to get in good with the kappa.

[X] This seems like the perfect time to test the mist horn.

Entertainment purposes. Nothing more.

Hehehehe. Poor Raymoo.

>>159863
Hey, what do you mean by
[ ] Park the ship, get out and knock on the door in person. Look all friendly and unassuming. Something about walking softly and big sticks and all that.
?

I was under the impression that we were, in fact, the ship. Basically a human brain melded with AI and a ship, given that this is the Cybran nation, after all.

>>160038
It is an early model. We're plugged in, yes, bot nut irreversibly so.

>>160071
but* not*
Fuck you, dyslexia.

>>160081
I honestly thought you were making robot jokes. I laughed.

Vote closed, writing.

[ X ] Your pressing need for a hangar for maintenance and repairs.

[ X ] This seems like the perfect time to test the mist horn.

You stand in front the shrine yard trying to figure out how not to turn it into a free-form grand canyon miniature. A quick scan gives you two people inside, not moving. Also, a mobile nuclear powersource. What.

"Hey Cirno, this super guardian of yours lives here right? Where is she then?" you ask.

"Reimu's probably asleep, I'll go wake her up!" Cirno pips up.

"No need." you reply. On top of your bridge, a hatch opens. With a faint whirr a sleek black mast extends. Aside from the standard radar, lidar, shit-knows-what-else-dar (you kinda skimmed here and there on the theory) there are five cones on it. Being bright orange, they earned your ship the nickname 'carrot top' back at the Nicodaime Ports. Never disrespectfully though. Most got the message after their first set of busted eardrums. Combined they weigh one hundred and fifty kilograms and fire two hundred decibel custom-tooled sonic blasts at over ten thousand sound-waves per second. You even had a shiny red button installed in your cockpit for them, just because.

Aya perks up .

"The Temple's been soundproofed recently! Shouting won't be effective."

"Just watch. Cover your ears for a sec." you say. Shield projector spooling up, looking good. Rather than using the old 'vibrate a solid' method of ye olde days, these cones are a set of semi-functional shield generators that generate sound via vibrating a series of short-lived shields.

"Ara?" the crow tengu says quizzically.

"Cover. Your. Ears." you repeat. Disengaging the Neural link for even a small bit feels like ice sliding across your spine. Superimposed over your vision you can see the Big Red Button faintly illuminated by the glow of monitor bank. Double vision confirms both of your allies have their ears plugged, slowly backing away.

Final check, one hundred and thirty decibels worth of metal. Check.

You press the Big Red Button.

Needless to say it makes one hell of an wake-up alarm. One of the persons inside actually bounces. Off the ceiling.

Livin' easy, Livin' free
Season Ticket On A One-Way Ride

On instinct, your mass begins to move with the rhythm.

Asking Nothing, Leave Me Be
Taking Everything In My Stride

The front door smashes open, revealing a frazzled looking twenty something girl in red and white. Small papers with scribbles fly around her, two of which, you note, are stuffed in her ears. She does a double take at the sight of you.

Don't Need Reason, Don't Need Rhyme
Ain't Nothing I Would Rather Do

You tone down the dancing. A bit. You were rocking so hard the temple began to wobble in stride with your moves. Also, bullets!

Going Down, Party Time
My Friends Are Gonna Be There Too

You literally dance around what shots you can, and tank the rest. The girl, you presume Reimu, takes off and comes at you directly, keeping up the pressure.

I'm On The Highway To Hell!


[ ] COME AT ME BRO SIS!
[ ] I was joking, cool down. What's up with nukes in a temple?
[ ] Okay, that was kinda dickish. Best let her vent for a moment. Besides, you can't touch this.

------------

Blergh, took way longer than it should have, this update.

[X] COME AT ME SIS!
Bring the Dakka.

[X] COME AT ME SIS!

And apologize after we get our ass kicked. This is how one makes friends in Gensokyo, after all.

[X] COME AT ME SIS!
-->[X] Dance away from her shots. U CAN'T TOUCH THIS!

This story is awesome.

[X] COME AT ME SIS!
-[X] Dance away from her shots.
--[X] That shrine looks fragile, don't dance near it.

[ ] Okay, that was kinda dickish. Best let her vent for a moment. Besides, you can't touch this.

[x] Okay, that was kinda dickish. Best let her vent for a moment. Besides, you can't touch this.
[x] That shrine looks fragile; don't dance near it.

[x] Okay, that was kinda dickish. Best let her vent for a moment. Besides, you can't touch this.
[x] That shrine looks fragile; don't dance near it.

[X] I was joking, cool down. What's up with nukes in a temple?

>Ruukoto
That brings up an interesting question. Can a nuclear-powered robot maid feel love?

[x] Okay, that was kinda dickish. Best let her vent for a moment. Besides, you can't touch this.
>blasting Highway to Hell
>Okuu is in the shrine
all of my yes

[x] COME AT ME BRO SIS!
[x] Okay, that was kinda dickish. Best let her vent for a moment. Besides, you can't touch this.

Hah!

[ ] Okay, that was kinda dickish. Best let her vent for a moment. Besides, you can't touch this.

[x] Preemptive strike MAXIMUM DAKKA.

Sorry Reimu, doing this for laughs.

[X] COME AT ME SIS!

Hiiiiighway to Hell!

[X] Okay, that was kinda dickish. Best let her vent for a moment. Besides, you can't touch this.

[ X ] COME AT ME BRO SIS!
- [ X ] Can't touch this.
- [ X ] ALL the guns.

Like hell you're going to back down from a challenge like that! Guns burning with energy you let fly an alpha strike, firing at the Miko with everything you've got. Bullets, lasers, missiles all burn through the air, blotting out the sun through sheer numbers. Surprised, she banks right and down, trying to get out of your forward firing arc.

No Stop Signs, Speed Limit
Nobody's Gonna Slow Me Down

You moon-walk back into the forest, leading the fight away from the property. The temple building is sturdier than you gave it credit for earlier, despite being now riddled with bullet holes and scorch marks the wooden structure still stands proud. Still, technically you came here to gather info and possibly make friends, so there's no need to test the limits of it's construction. A storm of flying paper and energy balls follows in your wake, enraged miko at it's centre.

Like A Wheel, Gonna Spin It
Nobody's Gonna Mess Me Round

You reach a clearing and make your 'stand' at it's centre, still dancing like mad. Reimu stays at the clearing's edge, dodging your shots with ease and returning fire with practical impunity. The gaps in your pattern simply grow too large at the range involved for them to be effective. Experimentally you sweep your guns from side to side to try and create more focused bullet streams. Although rotating the patterns helps a bit, it seems that you simply can't get more bullets per second beyond what you already had, and she adapts fast to the changes.

Hey Satan, Payin' My Dues
Playing In A Rocking Band

A warning about low HP crops up. Strange because as far as you can tell, the priestess' shots don't penetrate your armour at all, merely scorching the paint. Well, you have redundant hydraulics for a reason. Mentally shoving the message aside, you enact a cunning plan. Outside, the quad barrel spools down and you release smoke, feigning damage. Reimu isn't buying it, instead upping the pressure with even more firepower.

Hey Momma, Look At Me
I'm On My Way To The Promised Land


You fake a limp, slowing your dance moves. Just as the priestess closes in, a red border appears around your HUD, indicating a master alarm.

{WARNING!} HP LEVEL EXTREME! {WARNING!}

What the- Growling you shove it aside once more. Reimu's inside the optimal range, just barely. Suddenly abandoning pretences, the 'injured' legs display full functionality as your entire massive bulk whips around and madly charges towards the priestess. You savour the look on her face as realisation dawns.

I'm On The Highway To Hell
(Don't Stop Me)

The quad-barrel spews it's wrath, the four bullets surrounding the priestess in a pyramid pattern. When they're in exactly the right position, they detonate.

You thought you had seen Reimu dodge. As it turns out, you had not. Even as surprised as she was, as soon as she saw the four spheres surrounding her, she moved. Or rather, she didn't move at all unless needed. Total economy of movement. Not a single twitch was wasted, every bullet just barely grazing with millimetres to spare. You can't help but be awed by the seeming ease at which she dances through the barrage.

And I'm Going Down,

{WARNING!} HP ZERO! {WARNING!}

All The Way Down

Dimly, you can hear your speakers dying down as darkness descends.

I'm On The Highway To Hell...

----

You awake with a startled gasp, still jacked into the central console of your destroyer. All around you is utter darkness and silence. Extending your consciousness through your entry plug nets you nothing. Not a single electric squawk or hint of fusion powered life courses through the hull's structure. For all intents and purposes, your mighty ship is completely dead. The complete blackout is unnerving. Even when an Aeon torpedo sheared off the front half of the ship once, you still had the emergency lighting, there was still something going on. Now there's not even that, just inky blackness and dead silence. Suppressing a shiver you start the manual disconnect, gingerly pulling out the plugs connecting you to the computer heart of the Hammer. You begin to regret not picking integrated headlights. Sure, your mark two eyeballs are IR capable but that means jack if there's simply no light source at all. Fumbling for your flashlight, a small beam illuminates the room you've spent the better part of the last five years in. It's not much to look at. Barely large enough for a small locker and a space to change on one end, and an uplink chair with a massive monitor bank in front of it on the other. Fuzzy dice dangle from the ceiling. Two hatches occupy the remaining wall space. One hatch leads deeper into the bowels of the vessel, the second one leads to the outside.

Clambering out of the chair, you mentally thank on your bare knees the designer who suggested putting in manual releases. You turn to the locker and pull out

[ ] boomstick and body armour.
[ ] peaked cap and greatcoat.

[X] peaked cap and greatcoat.

We are in Gensokyo. We need cool clothes not practical stuff

[X] peaked cap and greatcoat.

Dress for success.

[x] Boomstick and body armour.

Our destroyer was just knocked out. We need maximum protection.

[X] peaked cap and greatcoat.

When firepower fails, we turn to FASHION!

[X] peaked cap and greatcoat.

Hats are a necessity in Gensokyo.

>>161358

Body armour comes with a pretty bitching helmet too.

>>161366
"Power armour is for pussies!" - Duke Nukem

[x] Boomstick and body armour.

I just can't say no to helmets!

[x] Boomstick and body armour.

We just got taken down by one of the locals, who might still be hostile. Granted, it was our own damn fault, but still... Best not to take chances.

[x] Boomstick and body armour.

We're a military man. We may not act like it often, but surely we've been trained enough to throw on our armor and grab a gun.

[x] peaked cap and greatcoat.
Because style is substance.

[ ] peaked cap and greatcoat.

Dat hat.

[x] Boomstick and body armor, with the peaked cap and greatcoat over it.

>>161376

Doesn't fit.

[x] Boomstick and body armor, with the peaked cap and greatcoat over it.

[x] Boomstick and body armour.

[X] peaked cap and greatcoat.

Helmets are ugly. Gensokyo demands nice hats.

>>161371
Here

May I offer a compromise?

Peaked hat plus body armor.

>>161393
If the hat's made of kevlar I have no complaint.

>>161393

>>161370 here. I could get behind this.

>>161393
Well... In Gensokyo, the hat is all that truly matters.

[x] peaked cap and greatcoat.

Peaked cap and body armor is fine too.

Any combo that includes the hat, I am cool with.

>>162615

To sage-post, type 'Sage' in the email field. Doing this will make people happy.

That said, vote called, writing in progress, around 75% done.

>>162616

Be honest, though. With that large a gap between post dates, would you have honestly remembered this thread if he hadn't bumped it?

That said, glad this thing is updating. Waiting warmly.

[X] peaked cap and greatcoat.
I just saw this. It looks hilariously awesome.

This was going to happen sooner, but you kept picking the right (or wrong, depending on who you ask) options.

[ X ] ARGREFARBLEWTF! IS! HAPPENING!

Instincts downloaded into your skull kick in, and you strap on a solid battlearmour while mentally you prepare to converse with the priestess. As you stare into the reflection of your helmet's visor, it begins to dawn on you what you are about to do, and how.

... The realisation of how utterly absurd your situation is, finally, finally begins to hammer home. This can't be happening. Violations of common sense abound, this can't be happening. Blue fairy winged girls and ravens with photocamera's dance around your vision.

This. Cannot. Be. Happening.

Oh god. You're in section 8. It's the only thing that makes sense. After five years of non-stop warfare, you've snapped. Totally flipped that pancake. Woohoo!

A moment later your helmet bounces off against the wall of your cabin. Fuck that, you lose your sanity in style! They want some, come and get it! Stripping off the body armour, you grab your ceremonial gear. A shiny black greatcoat with red highlights and matched peaked cap go over your plugsuit, a wide belt strapping the fluttering fabric tightly around your hips. The apparel has only a little gold, small bands on your shoulders to indicate your rank. It is elegant in it's simplicity, making you look official while preserving you totally ready for piloting should the need arise. Hand on your side, resting on the hilt of a ceremonial sabre, you make quite the dashing appearance, if you say so yourself.

You appear on the deck, just below the conning tower and above proton cannons. Your mad grin is lost to the trio who are poking one of your destroyer's legs.

"Avast, ye scurvy dogs! Ye did a good job of sinking me ship, now to face the captain! ARR-"

Your pirate tirade is interrupted courtesy of yet another one of those damnable paper seals hitting you square in the face. Limbs flailing you fall on your rump.

"Mmph mh hmm mfmhm!" you curse trying and failing to get it off. A flutter of paper draws your attention to the shrine maiden flying up to you.

"Who the hell are you?" she asks, obvioulsy mad.

"Hm hmm mmf hmmphf mphf." you reply eloquently. Without further ado she rips the paper roughly off your lips.

"I'm the madman who made you up as a figment of his imagination?" you try again. Reimu palms her face.

"Let me guess, outsider?" the miko asks.

"Probably? This is my subconscious, so I think I would be." you reply, stretching your brain. You have never lived in the woods much, maybe the whole natural paradise thing is a subconscious way of telling you you want to go out more?

"Not like that, this is Gensokyo, the-"

"Whoa, wait thar! Cirno gave me a rundown on that already. I ain't buying it. Impossible. I've gone mad and right now I'm probably kept in a padded cell somewhere, so spare me the whole cryptic bullshit and just tell me what I need to know to get out of this place." you interrupt. Reimu shrugs.

"You'd need permission from me and Yukari, but given you're a Youkai you're not going to be able to survive for long out there." she explains.

"Sounds like I need to embark on a long swashbuckling adventure full of new insights and personal development to find this lass. " you surmise. Cirno flutters over, looking down the still open hatch.

"Actually you can just wait at my place and I'll call her over." Reimu says. You open your mouth. Close it again.

"Gap lady is a meanie too to people she doesn't know, you'll like her." the ice fairy adds.

"Oy!" you protest, before turning back to Reimu. "You certain there will be no swashbuckling?" you say.

"Not unless you start any." she replies.

"Very well, lead the way then." you say, making a half bow. Reimu lifts off from the deck, and you casually walk after her, not even hesitating as you reach the edge of the Hammer. Since this is your subconscious, flying should be a piece of pie if you concentrate hard enough. At least, that how you think lucid dreaming works.

A forceful re-acquantance with the ground later, you're forced to re-eveluate that assessment. Your legs absorb the impact, forcing the air out of your lungs in a painful grunt. Hm, Aya's gone apparently. Didn't even say good bye or anything.

"Are you okay?" Reimu asks from above, a tinge of worry obvious in her voice.

"Underestimated myself a little, that's all." you say massaging your calves. The reinforced artificial muscle seems to be in working order, but you prefer to check hands on. All fine. You look up.

"I'm good, let's go." you say, and start running. Even with the flapping coat dragging you back and your legs power limited to facilitate repair, you can manage a decent 40 kilometres an hour on foot.

[ ] Yell at Cirno not to touch anything.
[ ] Meh, not like anything can be done without power and with the hatch locked.
[ ] Invite the Ice Fairy along.

>>162637
Yes, I would. Honestly half the time I'm staring at the screen not able to type anything that satisfies me. The I get frustrated for a period before returning.

>>157625
And this is why cyborgs are awesome. A meatbag would be dealing with splintered shins at this point. We, on the other hand, can hit 40kph at a jog.

[x] Yell at Cirno not to touch anything.

Of course, she's going to touch everything, but while she's fiddling around in our ship's guts, nobody else is. At least she's not likely to leave traps or anything else unpleasant in there for us.

[X] Meh, not like anything can be done without power and with the hatch locked.

Because Cirno screwing around with advanced technology can only be hilarious.

>>163267
Nearly forgot, here is name and trip to prove that yes, this really is me posting.

[X] Invite the Ice Fairy along.

If we're insane, then we need our Narrator. Cirno is that Narrator.

[x] Invite the Ice Fairy along.
She's probably a plot coupon of some sort.

[x] Invite the Ice Fairy along.

She's our inner child, or something, PSYCHOLOGY!!!!!

Seriously, that mental breakdown was hilarious.

[X] Meh, not like anything can be done without power and with the hatch locked.

[N] Invite the Ice Fairy along.
Why would we leave our tour guide behind? That's just silly.

[x] Invite the Ice Fairy along.

[x] Invite the Ice Fairy along.

>>163270
This man's reasoning is... What's the word... Not exactly sane, but...

I'll roll with it.

[X] Meh, not like anything can be done without power and with the hatch locked.

[x] Invite the Ice Fairy along.

So I guess this is dead.