...



After everything, I still ended up waiting for her outside. Leaving my black jacket inside turned out to be a brilliant idea - it really is friggin' hot today. No wonder I'd passed out earlier, seeing how the night was incredibly cold outside... Ah, outside. Renko and Maribel must've gotten out by now. I sort of regret not even saying goodbye, but then again, I was too busy to worry about such things. Either way, jeans and a white t-shirt are more than enough for this kind of weather. Wonder if all the summers are as hot here in Gensokyo...
"Good riddance." as expected, when the capricious girl finally shows up, what greets me is not a cheerful 'hello', neither an apologetic 'kept you waiting'. Instead, I'm faced with her scowl. But the rest of the sight... "What a swelter."
Though the overall colour pattern remains the same - red and white, all the rest is somehow... changed. The skirt isn't so long anymore, the shirt lacks those detached sleeves, and most of all, instead of the ribbon you'd expect to see in her hair, there's a large, round hat, with a wide brim.
Amazed by the overall impression, I don't notice when she passes by me.
"What are you waiting for?"
"Ah ye--" I turn to her, but stop my sentence in the middle "Wait, aren't we going to fly?"
She frowns.
"Are you crazy? I thought I was the one who almost got her skull cracked open?"
"Ah, yes, right..."
I admit my foolishness and begin descending the stairs, trying to keep as close to her as possible, without intimidating her too much. Her pace may be steady, but god knows when the nausea decides to make it's return. When that happens, I better be near.
Despite all that, I can't shake off the feeling she's in high spirits. Or it's just how the outfit makes her look. Well, one thing's for sure - I'm still in one piece, and it's not due to my cunning that I retained this wholesome form.


[ ] Strike up a conversation.
--[ ] About tomorrow's meeting.
--[ ] It'll sound silly, but ask about herself.
--[ ] About my stay at the shrine.
[ ] Keep quiet, if she wants to talk, she'll start doing so on her own.
[ ] Compliment her looks, but stay quiet otherwise. Refuse to say anything else, in case she bites the bait.

{X} Compliment her looks.
{X} Strike up a conversation.
--{X} About my stay at the shrine.
--{X} About tomorrow's meeting.

[x] Compliment her looks, but stay quiet otherwise. Refuse to say anything else, in case she bites the bait.

A shrine maiden before a woman? Oh ho, let's change that.

[x] Compliment her looks, but stay quiet otherwise. Refuse to say anything else, in case she bites the bait.

[x] Strike up a conversation.
[x] Compliment her on her looks.
[x] It'll sound silly, but ask about herself.
[x] Ask about Suika and Mima, too, just to water down a boiling pot.

[ ] Compliment her looks, but stay quiet otherwise. Refuse to say anything else, in case she bites the bait.

Gently does it.

[x] Compliment her looks.
[x] Strike up a conversation.
--[x] About tomorrow's meeting.
--[x] It'll sound silly, but ask about herself.

[x] Strike up a conversation.
--[x] About tomorrow's meeting.
--[x] It'll sound silly, but ask about herself.
--[x] Talk about the intricacies of Yin Yang orbs and Seal cards.
[x] Compliment on looks after conversation, then the quietness.

[x] Strike up a conversation.
--[x] About tomorrow's meeting.
--[x] It'll sound silly, but ask about herself.
--[x] Talk about the intricacies of Yin Yang orbs and Seal cards.
[x] Compliment on looks after conversation, then the quietness.

It's the end of THP as we know it~...
It's the end of THP-- oh, wait, it's back up.

And to think I was gonna write another update on my own accord. Bah.

==

[x] Compliment her looks, but stay quiet otherwise. Refuse to say anything else, in case she bites the bait.

Amazing, that. The way we winded up despite my insanity's utmost efforts to ruin everything. Either that girl has a natural resistance to foolery, or is simply incredibly understanding when it comes to dealing with loonies, which, given her profession, would be rather plausible. If it's true, though, I've no idea, and it wouldn't help me sort my thoughts, even if I assumed the one or the other. Besides, does that matter, now? Whether she is still angry with me or not will show later, and in case she is, I'll do my best to turn the tables. Don't want this wonderful experience to change into a Hollywood horror just yet, it hasn't even been a day. Knowing my luck, I'll end up swimming shoulder-deep in muck sooner or later. Somehow, that's the only thing I find myself unable to doubt. If the story really plays out like this, at least I'm not going to face the severe disappointment.
Well, no use in worrying about the future, now, I can only enjoy the beautiful present. And beautiful it is indeed - gently swaying her shapely buttocks as she descends the stairs, hiding her reddish gaze under her hat's brim. I'm beginning to think she's brought it solely for that purpose. Embarrassment? Spite, perhaps? Whatever, nothing's wrong, just as long as I can look at her without being disturbed by her fists, which I hope she'd unclench, since it sort of ruins the otherwise adorable image a bit. Hah, so she holds grief after all, despite her heartening words. What a laughable irony, was she trying to convince herself by convincing me? Why do I find that charming? God only knows, I can't understand myself anymore. Does she already have me in her sweet yokes? Nonsense. But then again, didn't I disturb her peace - thus setting some really unpleasant events in motion, may I add - solely to catch her naked? Why did I do that, again? Well, I can only hope that now that it's happened, unfolding will be swift and gentle enough for my pride. I'm too young to go impotent, I'm too young! On the other hand, if it lets me see her flustered face...
Regardless of my efforts to hide it, a smile creeps onto my lips, completely ignoring the otherwise rather stale situation. Oh well, the day is young, and admirably pretty, what's there to lose? Why was I afraid of it showing in the first place? Sun shines, birds sing, and brother, I feel good! No matter I awoke from a sun-induced unconsciousness less than two hours ago, I'm still alive! Or rather, alive again, and not even the prospect of a long walk under the blazing sunlight can raze my enthusiasm! To top it off, I've a wonderful girl beside me, what's there to regret? Ah, I can already tell, the effort put into getting here was not in vain! Almost like if I were thrown into a paperback novel, where everything is so simple, one begins to wonder if it's just a dream. But, unless something proves me otherwise, I'm going to enjoy this reality!
Turning to Reimu, I give her getup a quick scan, just to remind my distracted mind what was it I was about to say. And what I wanted to say was...
"Reimu," I call her by name.
"Hm?" she gives me a short reply, though without looking.
"You look great in those."
As if on a cue, she stops in her tracks, and so do I, bearing that irresistible smile on my face like some sort of a defensive mask, intended to shield me from her scornful look. Oh, it would take a hundred of those to discourage me, Hakurei!
"Did I just hear what I heard?"
Do I sense disbelief? Or is it something else?
"What are you talking about, I wonder?"
Shrugging, I start walking again, leaving her to swim in confusion... Or so I think. Because the next time I blink, she's standing right before me, blocking my way, wearing a cute scowl on her face.
"Look," she waves a finger in front of my nose, making me want to bite it "I don't know what kind of delusions you've formed inside this empty head of yours, but you're a hundred years too early to compliment me!" I can only appreciate the blush she's desperately trying to fight off. I must admit though, her tone she manages to hold in full control. "Don't get any strange ideas, you. Seeing me naked doesn't give you any rights to--"
"If you say so." I cut into her words by shoving aside that slender hand of hers, and then, without any regard for whatever she might be thinking, simply pass by her, and continue the trek down the stairs.
Of course, she follows without delay.
"Hey! Were you even listening?! Hey!"
"..."
"What's wrong with you!" she does her best to regain my attention, but alas, I do my best to do otherwise "Hey, I'm talking to you!"
"..."
Some day, I'll answer you differently, Reimu, but not right now. Just let me enjoy your irritation, would you kindly?
"Fine!" she finally says "If that's how it's going to be!"
The two of us fall silent.

For a bit.
"... thanks."
I barely catch the sound of her voice, but damn, I swear it takes two hands to wipe the grin off my face.



At last! At the awaited, godforsaken last, the horrendous staircase ends, leaving us standing on a branching path. Whoever built that thing, deserves to be spat in the face. What's the point? Couldn't they just have a path leading uphill? At least you could slide down, instead of walking, god damn! Hell, I've no idea how exactly, but fuck, stairs suck, and anyone who disagrees should be condemned to walking up and down this particular set of them for all eternity.
"So," I manage to gasp in between deep breaths "Where now?"
Reimu, on the other hand, appears unaffected by the trip. Ah, annoying. How annoying.
"Hm," she puts hands on her hips and looks up to the sky, sighing "I was supposed to visit a friend first..."
"Alright then," I straighten up and exhale loudly "Let's get goi--"
"Oh no." but my enthusiasm immediately gets extinguished by her sour expression "You're going to the village. I'm not going to explain who the hell you are when where you came from to him."
Hah! There goes the main reason for accompanying her, at least if we're talking about the official ones. Surely, she does realize that, doesn't she?
"Wasn't I supposed to escort you in case--"
"Ah yes," she interrupts me yet again "Indeed you were. Well, rest assured, he lives nearby. I'll just get him to escort me to the village afterwards, if it bothers you that much. Besides, I need a breather. Don't even think about following me. Village's that way."
"Breather? From wha--"
I try to protest, but she's already went off in one of the three directions the path branches off to.
Ah, how impudent. Irritating. Who the hell does she think she is? No, more importantly, what about her health? What about my waggling buttocks? What about my efforts, Reimu? What about--?!
But here I am, standing idly while the time runs out. Go to the village, she says. Don't follow me, she says. Selfishness, nothing more.

[ ] Nevertheless, I don't want to cause any additional trouble for her, now do I? Time to hit the road.
[ ] Obviously, follow her. Wherever she's headed, I'm going there as well.
[ ] Follow her, but keep a low profile. Time for a little stealth.

>>21453
And i feel fine

[x] Follow her, but keep a low profile. Time for a little stealth.

lol, just hilarious

[ ] Follow her, but keep a low profile. Time for a little stealth.

[x] Follow her, but keep a low profile. Time for a little stealth.

>>21453
You beat me to it. What's the point of living without TS anyway? If it didn't come back today I was just gonna go off myself. Also, word on the street is that 6-o'clock is TV hour. Make sure not to get caught in the foreign tower.

{X} Follow her, but keep a low profile. Time for a little stealth.

[x] Nevertheless, I don't want to cause any additional trouble for her, now do I? Time to hit the road.

I know she's going to kill us if we try the other two options.

[X] Follow her, but keep a low profile. Time for a little stealth.

Telling me what to do, will she! Foolishness, Reimu! Foolishness! I take it you do not yet know the place you belong in, you capricious miko. Even if there were a thousand of you, telling me to leave them alone, I still wouldn't relinquish my will, despite the possibility of the noise being unbearable. Am I returning your mistake of acting selfish? Perhaps. But it is your fault for giving me an order worth of breaking. One could say, you've brought this on yourself - isn't it a principle when it comes to humans? That prohibiting a thing will only serve to feed their curiosity? Or am I falling victim to some sort of twisted reverse psychology? No matter, if it's a trap laid by her, I'll be falling into it, with a smile on my face. There's a voice in my head, telling me not to let go yet.
"Hah!" I end my panting with a cocky snort. Directed more at my thoughts than at anything else, simply to add a little bit of piquancy to the otherwise rather dull and immature decision. Are we having fun yet, dear me? Oh no, not yet, but soon, my precious, soon we'll be tailing that selfish girl like a fair game. After all, haven't I decided to throw away everything that'd kept my life boring in the outside world? I've already broken the sane facade by forcing my familiarity onto Renko and Maribel. I'd even cut my hair and changed my name, just to start anew. Following Reimu against her orders isn't a big deal, and truth be told, even if it were, I'd have still done it. For the kicks, the ones she'll probably be handing to my crotch afterwards. But whatever! I just wanna have some fun, I wanna pull the miko's nerves a little, though I'm sure some day, somehow, it's going to backfire. Let us hope the effects will be pleasant. If not, regret will be in place. Some day, somehow, but not right now. I know I'm wondering when. And she's the only one who knows that. "We'll see."
With that, I pluck myself out the sea of negative thoughts, and urge my legs to follow the direction the miko's disappeared in.


The sun glitters brightly among the azure expanse of afternoon sky.


...


From bush to bush, from tree to tree, from rock to rock, I slowly follow her strangely brisk figure, letting it continuously flash in and out of my sight. It's not like I'm going to lose my way anyway, this path is straight enough for a blind cripple to walk along it, and I'm quite certain there's nothing wrong with neither my eyes nor my legs. The head, now that's a different thing, but I'm no Freud to ransack in my grey matter like if it were vanilla ice-cream. Besides, my mind is my fortress, there's not a single person I'd ever allow to rummage through it's subtleties. The throne of Seven Golden Nights is mine! And no one else's!
Those and many other cheerful thoughts invade my mind, which I'd set to idle state, concentrating completely on not getting detected by my prey-- pardon, by Reimu, that is, until we reach a clearing in the labyrinth of trees, upon which happening I lay low under one of the colourful bushes, oh-so-numerous around this place, and wait a few seconds. What for? Oh, it's simple. I can't step out of the cover and into an open terrain with her still on her way. It is obvious that this house right here, the only one present in the vicinity of miles, is her destination, as it would be rather nonsensical for it not to be it. With it pinned down, the only thing left is wait.
"Five... Four..." I count down out loud "Three... Two... One..." The sound of door opening and closing is the cue. I arise from behind my cover, and - as leisurely as you could imagine - follow Reimu's steps. "Ah..." a sigh escapes my lips "So this is the famous Kourindou."
Doesn't look so famous from where I'm standing. All I see is a bit rundown house built in some weird mixture of western and eastern styles, finished with both wood and brick, but the roof being thatched, which creates a feeling of... I don't know, chaotic mish-mash? Whoever came up with this design, had to be high. Or come from different time periods, however impossible that may sound. Nevertheless, there's no doubt this IS the famous Kourindou. The sign above the front door, at the first sight illegible, reveals to say something along the lines of 'Rinnosuke's Junk in the Trunk' upon closer inspection. The only thing missing from the picture is smoke rising lazily from a chimney, but only a loony would want to warm himself near a fireplace on a day as hot as this.
That's it for the contemplation, time to switch the action switch.
"Eh? Really? What's it do?"
However, just when I reach for the doorknob, a new voice - female - comes from inside, emanating with immature curiosity.
"Like I said," soon to be answered by another, male and deeper for a change "It's a weapon. It paralyzes your opponents in an instant."
"How's it work?"
"I can't say for sure, but..."
"Kourin." ah, and here it is, the awaited voice of the miko "I don't have all day. Where are my clothes? You said they'd be ready by today."
"Yes, just let me explain--"
"What's this button do-- Ooooh!"

[ ] Proceed inside, as if thought it was the most ordinary thing in the world.
[ ] Kick down the door! Storm inside! There won't be using strange weapons indoors on my watch! Or at least if Reimu's around to get in danger.
[ ] No need to be rude. Wait outside, the day is young.

[x] I'm the motherfucking assassin sneaking in through the window jesus christ

Come on, you knew this was coming.

[x] I'm the motherfucking santa claus sneaking in through the chimney jesus christ

[x] No need to be rude. Wait outside, the day is young.
[x] The moment our miko comes out of that door, we hoist her up and carry her to the village like a princess, ignoring every kick and punch and order she gives us.
[x] "...Couldn't help it... I was worried about you..."

[x] I'm the motherfucking assassin sneaking in through the window jesus christ (sneak in and see what's up)

Though it was said jokingly, I think this is a good idea. Waiting outside would destroy the point of sneaking because we would have no idea what the hell is going on. Barging in and announcing ourselves so early in the sneaking is likely just to get us punched by Reimu prematurely, unless by some ungodly offchance we save her from the device from the human world. Though I think we wouldn't be so lucky.

{~} I'm the motherfucking assassin sneaking in through the window jesus christ

[x] I'm the motherfucking assassin sneaking in through the window jesus christ

[x] Listen in for awhile and leave for the village when you conclude that everything is okay.

Oh, look, a rational option.

[X] Window, sneaking, tea, etc.

Just like the old times.

[x] I'm the motherfucking assassin sneaking in through the window jesus christ.

We're so going to get paralyzed.

[x] I'm the motherfucking assassin sneaking in through the window jesus christ

Whatever it is they're handling in there can't be anything safe. Paralyze your opponent in an instant? Either we're talking about them advanced magicks, or Kourin's got his hands on something dangerous from the outside world. It doesn't matter to me one way or the other, for the simple reason of someone who - as much as I'd hate to say it to anyone's face - is somehow important to me being so near to it. That damn shopkeeper might know what it is for, but judging by his words, he hasn't a slightest idea on how to treat it. Now what, point insertion? Storm in and reap the miko's anger, at the cost of a hypothetical averted disaster? No, even I am not stupid enough to act in such a way. Besides, sudden maneuvers may only trigger unpleasant events.
But there is another solution, is there not? It hurts my pride to be sneaking around like an ordinary thief, but for the sake of my and everyone else's safety, I shall sacrifice myself, if only a little bit. Circle around the house. Find a point of entry free from any extrinsic eyes, thus avoiding detection until the last moment. Well, then.
"There's a spark! A spark! Did you see that, Kourin?"
"Yes, but please, be careful... Like I was saying..."
No heed is paid to the conversation. It's not like I'm going to hear anything useful. Instead of fishing for information where it's not present, I may as well get to work already.

Circling around the house yielded interesting results, in form of an opened window, just in my reach. It's been a long time since I've last done something like this, but old habits die hard, they say, so should old skills. Just like with riding a bike - you don't forget that, now do you?
"Hoof!" I pull myself up by the wooden frame, and jump - pardon - throw my helpless body inside. "Ack, ack! Tsk!"
Fortunately, there was no one to witness my spectacular fall. Neither was there any damage in physical property... Kourin's physical property. On the other hand, my buttocks appear to be suffering a severe case of painus constantis, in layman's terms: ouch, my ass. Well, means justify ends, and so I find myself in a room remotely resembling kitchen... If it wasn't for the mess around, I'd have thought it was a woman's kitchen. But seeing all the dirty plates and trash laying around, I've no doubts - regardless of his pederasty, Kourin is a man in full swing. For the love of cleaning detergent, I swear even my kitchen was tidier!
Ironically, despite having found myself in such an interesting place, the main point of interest lies not within it - or anywhere around, actually - as even from here, I can hear scraps of the earlier conversation still raging on, as the man desperately tries to explain something to the woman... Occasionally interrupted by the voice of my annoyed miko. No time to contemplate my aching butt, then. Onward, stealthily, but confidently I step into the corridor.

"Woah, another spark!"
"Marisa, I beg of you, stop playing around, you've no idea what's this thing do--"
"Kourin, for god's sake."
"Sparks!"
And lo and behold, the scene that greets me behind the nearest turn is no other than the one I'd eavesdropped on before breaking in. Only from quite an unexpected perspective. Well, put simply, I've flanked them all, flanked them from behind. It seems that the entrance hall of Kourin's house has been changed into a store, thus nicely cutting off the rest of the establishment from his usual business. Neat. None of them noticed me as well, though it's mostly the merit of the aforementioned fact, rather than my sneaking skills.
"Marisa, please..."
"Sparks, I say!" But what shocks me the most is the object the silly witch - if I recall the name of her profession correctly - is brandishing around. Well, I'd expected a bomb, I'd expected tear gas, but what she has in her hands, is a simple paralyzer. The kind you'd see in a smart lady's handbag, should you peek inside it unnoticed. An ordinary thing like that, and she still causes such a hassle over it. How noisy. "How much for it?"
"Marisa, you don't even know what it does!"
"More importantly, about those clothes..." Reimu tries to cut in, but is totally ignored by the other two "God..."
Ah, there she goes, sarcastically rolling her eyes... Which accidentally, on a pure chance land on me.

So much for stealth.

I send her a mute greeting, in form of a grin. She, on the other hand, looks like if she choked on a too big piece of banana. Her mouth, I suspect without her even noticing, opens like a gate of insult-filled hell, her eyes widen. A sight to behold, of indescribable cutesy... That also happens to carry a possibility of foretelling my doom. Whatever, for that look alone, it was worth it.
"I know what it does!"
"You don't!"
The other two remain oblivious to my presence, which Reimu quickly - that is, after regaining control of her body - uses to gesture me... I guess to 'get the fuck out', although I'm not exactly skilled in reading from lips' movement. Foolishness, Reimu. I did not come here solely to back away! Wait, in the first place, why did I come here?
"Then let's test it!" the witch proposes in a completely unfitting, cheerful tone.
"What do you mean, test it?! It's a weapon, Marisa!"
Again, Reimu's eyes urge me to retreat. Too bad they're interrupted by Marisa grabbing their owner's hand, and putting the little, black box directly on her forearm.
"Wah?"
"Here goes!"
Surprised, the victim of the selfish girl lets out a squeal. Wait, she's not going to--?!

[ ] "Stop!" rush in and kick Kourin from behind "Mongrel! Weapons are not to be handed to women and children!"
[ ] Reverse the harass! Let her have a taste of her own medicine! You're going down, Marisa!
[ ] Do nothing, what's the worst that could happen?
[ ] Fine, let her witness what happens when she drives me away! Enjoy your forced sleep, Reimu.

==

Pardon the slipshod form. I'm rather sleepy.
Oh, and I'll be spending the day outside/at various people's places tomorrow, expect me in the evening, GMT+1, as always. Agh, those updates wouldn't be so delayed, if it wasn't for my recent obsession over collecting decent Reimu pictures from pixiv. Accursed thing. Also, Re-Volt.

[ ] "Stop!" rush in and kick Kourin from behind "Mongrel! Weapons are not to be handed to women and children!"

[x] Yell at Marisa "STOP CRIMINAL SCUM" and proceed to stop her.

I have a feeling tasering Marisa with a regular spark might end up with us getting a master spark...[/bad puns] Anyway, trying to hurt Marisa is probably a bad idea.

The topmost option does hurt Kourin... but then that doesn't solve anything. Then all we have is a kicked and angry Kourin and a still-tasered Reimu.

And the other options are all things that would get Reimu tasered... bad times. No tasering Reimu... kay?

[x] Do nothing, what's the worst that could happen?

[x] Jump and redirect it to yourself. Better you than a woman.
[x] And if your reflexes are fast enough, grab the box and shock Marisa in the ass with it - lightly.
[x] "You, idiot" point the taser at Marisa "This thing not only hurts to all fucking hell, it will literally knock you out, which she doesn't need right now" point back to Reimu. "And you" point at Kourin "you shouldn't be letting women and children play with dangerous things like this".

Feel free to chopshop this any way you want. Or we could just knock them both out and run away with Reimu under our arm; that always works.

[x] "Stop!" rush in and kick Kourin from behind "Mongrel! Weapons are not to be handed to women and children!"

Nothing but women and children!

[x] Yell at Marisa "STOP CRIMINAL SCUM" and proceed to stop her.

[x] Yell at Marisa "STOP RIGHT THERE CRIMINAL SCUM" and proceed to stop her.

I'd vote for the Gilgamesh option, but it's pretty clear we're doing a shitty job at playing Gilgamesh and would only tarnish his name even further by not dropping the act.

Gilgamesh is above sneaking in through the window you mongrels.

[ ] "Stop!" rush in and kick Kourin from behind "Mongrel! Weapons are not to be handed to women and children!"

[x] "Stop!" rush in and kick Kourin from behind "Mongrel! Weapons are not to be handed to women and children!"

[ ] "Stop!" rush in and kick Kourin from behind "Mongrel! Weapons are not to be handed to women and children!"

>>21482

What I thought while writing that update.

>>21466
>rational

Get out.

>>21462

You people have the fantasy... I wonder if that vote was sarcastic.

>>21482

We'll make that up once we start being able to kill shit.

[x] Yell at Marisa "STOP RIGHT THERE CRIMINAL SCUM" and proceed to stop her.

Why attack Kourin when it's Marisa that's about to shock the ever-loving shit out of Reimu?

>>21488
less talking, more writing

Boring CS classes are boring, public access terminals are public. Enjoy your premature update.

==

[x] Yell at Marisa "STOP RIGHT THERE CRIMINAL SCUM" and proceed to stop her.

Surely, she must has her own reasons for having such an ill interest in dangerous devices, be it mental instability, bad upbringing, or professional perversion, but frankly, I don't give a damn. She may as well turn into an American, patriot moose in an instant, and start waving around denim flags for all I care. Right now, my mind's focused on this one, lone goal alone. Reimu is in danger. It's all that matters. Sod global warming, the issue of the day is whether I can find enough strength in my muscles to rescue her in time.
But there's no need to worry about such things. It seems that somehow, my body knows better than to slow down to fit my thinking processes' speed. Thank god. Thank me. Thank fuck.
With no heed for anyone's feelings, I shove the nuisance - otherwise known as Kourin - aside, and storm towards Marisa and Reimu. Strange, how everything seems to have started moving slowly, like if though I'd found myself in a poor Matrix-wanna-be movie. No matter. The witch's finger is resting upon the ominously red button of the paralyzer, sending lightning-fast shivers down my spine. I've no idea how much kick can that baby pack, but one thing's undoubtable - it has to hurt, and hurt plenty.
"STOP--!!!" my throat screams desperately, like if someone's life depended on it "RIGHT THERE---!!!"
But it's too late. I'm way too slow. Regardless of how fast my reaction was, I can't reach them, I can't grab their attention before... Before Marisa presses the accursed button. I can't do anything to stop the device from quickly powering up, ready to send a wave of electricity along my miko's forearm, leaving pain and shock in it's wake. I can't do anything.
I don't even want to watch. Even I can't find enough courage to idly watch her impending suffering.

My eyes close.



"Ahh?!" But the voice that breaks the sluggish silence isn't whose you'd expect it to be. Instead of a high-pitched scream from Reimu, my ears catch a gasp of surprisal from Marisa. For what reason-- "Who---?!"
It all makes sense when I force my eyelids open. Despite all the odds, the paralyzer is no longer in her hands.
Instead, I find it grasped tightly in mine.
"What..."
How did it..."I'm sure I couldn't reach it in time, just what the hell is going on..."No, wait, this means I've succeeded. It's a triumph. I blew my cover, but heck, Reimu is still alive and healthy. That's right, it was a small price to pay for her safety. My cover is nothing--
"... oops."
My cover is no more. Thanks to my... excess, everyone's eyes are currently on me. Marisa, Reimu, Kourin, and my own voice of reason glare at me in dumbfounded silence. Crap. I was so concentrated on getting in here, I couldn't come up with a decent excuse. And I'm sure that even here, in Gensokyo, barging into someone's house, then almost-assaulting one of the owners' guests isn't exactly a welcome custom. Nor a custom at all. I tighten my grip on the paralyzer, out of anxiety. This might not turn out as nice as I hope it would. Get ready for the worst, for you'll be kicked in the nuts no matter the outcome, you know that too well, Kane.
"Ve..." Marisa is the first one to regain enough courage to speak up "Vengeful spirit of the sparky device!"
Yet her words make no sense at all. Other than awakening everyone else. Reimu resumes to mutely open and close her mouth, like a fish taken out of the lifegiving water.
"Er..." I take a step back without realizing that someone's already been standing there, and bump into a shoulder of someone higher - and regrettably more muscular - than me. In return, my own shoulder gets grabbed by a hand of his. "Hello?"
"Would you kindly," I swear his glasses just shined in a threatening way "Tell us who you are?"
"I'm..." I swallow with difficulty "Er, my name is... Koganeiro..."
"I'm not talking about your name." his fingers are digging into my skin "I'm asking, why exactly are you here... And how did you get it. Because I'm sure you did not come through the door."
Shit. This is something I haven't taken into consideration. Isn't he supposed to be a weakling? Lil'-boys' lover? Metrosexual pederast? Or did I subconsciously arrange him such an image to ease my raging pride? Oh, I hate it when stupid assumptions prove their creator's undoing. I just hate it.
"Fine... Fine..." but there's already an outline of an excuse formed in my head "I'll confess."
"About time."
About time my ass.
"I'm from the village." I lie without blinking "I sought to buy some supplies from your shop, though I doubt you distinguish between all us humans coming here."
"Hm."
He has the balls to shamelessly agree! What a bastard!
"Anyway... When I got here, I heard some strange noises and words coming from inside... So I naturally assumed something fishy was going on..." I just hope those pauses won't awaken his suspicions "So naturally, I took every possible precaution and snuck trough the window, in case of, you know, attackers or robbers trying to perhaps... You know, rob your shop. Or something."
Ack. All he does is frown. Wasn't that good enough?
"H-he may be right, Kourin." the cavalry arrives from the least expected direction - from Reimu "People at the village really are paranoid about those things. You know, with all the youkai running around and whatnot."
"Right!" even Marisa decided to throw in a comment of her own "One time I went there..."
But no one pays attention to her. Kourin lets go of my shoulder, and gives me a last, suspicious look before letting out a sigh. Success?
"Let's say I believe you." he reaches out a hand "Rinnosuke Morichika. Though I think you've already known that. You're... Koganeiro...?"
"Koganeiro Nanatsuyoru." I shake it, happy the mess' finnaly been taken care of and thrown into oblivion "Kane, for short. I'm rather new here. A former outsider."
Keywords, Kourin. Keywords. Can you grasp them? I know your mind can, and will do so.
And indeed it does.
"An outsider, hm?" the interest in his voice can't be feigned, though he's doing his best not to let it show "Then I take it you would know how this thing works?"
Of course, it's about the paralyzer in my hand. Does he want technicals? Well, we're both men, and no man can resist learning something new about dangerous things, as far as I can tell, but... Hm, beside the obvious, red 'FIRE' button, it also has some sort of a switch... 'MIN' and 'MAX' it says. What sort of bullcrap is this?
"Hmm." I mutter while examining the accursed thing "Out of curiosity, how did this get here?"
"Don't ask me." my conversant answers, unexpectedly honestly "I found it in an abandoned camp, somewhere in the forest, along with a bunch of other outsider stuff. Hey," he interrupts my search for more hidden buttons or switches "Can you, er, demonstrate? It's not... that dangerous, is it?"
"Demonstrate, huh...?"
Of course, it's ridiculous to think in such a way, but god damn, I understand him. I'd probably act the same, if I were in his shoes.

[ ] Demonstrate... on MAX.
--[ ] On myself.
--[ ] On Kourin, who else?
--[ ] On Marisa.
--[ ] On Reimu.
[ ] Demonstrate... on MIN.
--[ ] On myself.
--[ ] On Kourin, who else?
--[ ] On Marisa.
--[ ] On Reimu.
[ ] "Afraid not, sorry." nod politely "This thing's just too nasty for any of us to take."
--[ ] "More importantly, let's get down to business. I'm looking for a weapon."
--[ ] "More importantly, you should tend to your customers. I'll just... wait outside."

==

I'll be back at home in around 3-4 hours. You know the drill.

[ ] Demonstrate... on MAX.
--[ ] On Reimu.

No regrets.

[X] Demonstrate... on MAX.
--[X] On Kourin, who else?

If you want to fully appreciate the effects, you really do have to experience them first-hand.

[X] Demonstrate... on MAX.
--[X] On Kourin, who else?

[x] Demonstrate... on MAX.
--[x] On Kourin, who else?

He's a half-youkai, I'm sure he can take it.

[x] Spill some water on the ground so you can :
--[x] Demonstrate on MAX
----[x] For everyone!

>"I found it in an abandoned camp, somewhere in the forest, along with a bunch of other outsider stuff. Hey,"

I see what you did there.

[X] Demonstrate... on MAX.
--[X] On Kourin, who else?

Well, I was planning on knocking you unconscious and stealing all your weapons anyway.

Also, hooray, Kane's first weapon!

[x] Demonstrate... on MIN
--[x] On Kourin, who else?
[x] Weapon get.

If we demonstrate on Max, he won't be conscious enough to give us a weapon now, will he?

[x] Demonstrate... on MIN.
[x] On Marisa; or rather, her cute little buttox.
[x] "That was just a little shock, at the minimum amount this thing can do. These can go up to as much as 1000K volts, and at max, will knock you clear out; kind of like being hit by lightening, if that's more understandable. Not only that, while used mainly to paralyze your 'victim' or assailant, there have been instances where they've killed before. It is definitely not a toy"

[x] Demonstrate... on MIN
--[x] On Kourin, who else?

>It all makes sense when I force my eyelids open. Despite all the odds, the paralyzer is no longer in her hands.
>Instead, I find it grasped tightly in mine.

Our superpower is the gravity gun. Kick ass.

[x] Demonstrate... on MIN
--[x] On Kourin, who else?

>>21494

Less talkin', more them readin' n' votin', boyz.

>>21511

Ah, at least one of you did. I'm slightly satisfied.

>>21519

I smirked.


That being said, I'm back home, but I've been fucking around with Reimu. To be exact, with GIMP and Reimu. A threesome with a graphic edition software and a pretty girl every now and again does make life more interesting. On a side note, her armpits are a hell to render, and for some reason make me think of shaving them with a dull razor.
One or two updates today, I'll write as soon as I'm done with testing my new neon script.

[X] Demonstrate... on MAX.
--[X] On Kourin, who else?

>>21482

Well, then why don't you try voting to act like him more? It's still not too late to change your lowlife ways!

>>21511

Oh! That reminds me of something. YAF...update Faggotry already.

And I'm ashamed of you guys, trying to harm poor Kourin...

itslikeireallywasjapanese.png (1.94MB)

==
[x] Demonstrate... on MAX.
--[x] On Kourin, who else?

Nevertheless, curiosity is the first step on the sloppy road to hell, Kourin, and yours shall be your undoing. Play with the sword, die by the sword. I can't help but smirk. Out of place? Hell yes, but my plans are to be savoured in any way possible, as long as it doesn't make me look like a loony in the eyes of the girls. Well, truth be told, I couldn't care less about Marisa, I've a feeling she's the type to enjoy the company of fellow crazy people more than she would that of a perfectly normal person... Does that mean we'd make a good pair? I wonder.
"Alright." though it tugs at my conscience to do it, I leave the stun gun at the MAX setting. One can only ponder how strong it is. Well, it's not like I'm going to feel it anyway, I might as well forfeit thinking about it. "Who should we use it on, though?" my voice is completely innocent "Girls are out of question, and I'm sure not going to electrocute myself just for the heck of it."
"Well, if it's not dangerous..." Kourin pauses for a moment "I think I should be able to take a little bit of pain."
Ah, right into my trap. Trying to play a tough guy in front of them, are you, bastard? Well... You're in for one wild disappointment. Let's see you blush a pretty pink when they reminiscence about you fainting on the spot!
"If you say so," I shrug in an indifferent manner "Ready to learn the wonders of science the hard way, then?"
Haha, amazing, how at a time like this he's doing something as pathetic as sticking out his chest in an overly confident way. T'is the wrong way, my dearest companion - the more cocky you act, the more severe your disappointment will be! Well, either way, I win. Sucks to be you, Kourin. Unless it's me overcalculating my victory, in the next 30 seconds, you'll be writhing on the floor. Prepare yourself!
"Pain is only a matter of willpower."
So boastful. Let's wipe that pride away, shall we? The sound of test electrodes firing up sends shivers down my nape, I can only imagine how the one that's about to get hit by 'em sparks must feel like. Yet, he retains a straight face. Brag all you want, Kourin. Brag all you want. In the end, you'll be crying.
"Don't try to evade--!"
With that brief warning, I come at him. Wielding the paralyzer like I knife, I dash, jump at him, intent on driving it deep into his stomach, just to add to the kick. Might as well make the suffering complete, he'll be losing consciousness anyway, and it will be a pleasure to make him cry. This is a payback, Kourin! Are you ready to eat up your words?
Horrible crackling, hitherto echoing down the whole building, breaks when the device comes in contact with his exposed cleavage. Even if it's too close to his heart and neck, I couldn't care less, it's not like he's going to die anyway. Even as a half-breed, he ought to possess the physical prowess of a youkai. Though he seems to lack what most humans have - common sense. One does not simply allow a stranger that has just broken into his house to use a device of an unknown origin, but clearly a weapon, on himself!
"Hahaha!" I can't help but laugh into his face as he falls to his knees, trying to push me away, miraculously keeping his jaws shut like a stubborn kid, not letting anything, not even a single groan out. Amazing, I wonder how long will he be able to sustain this state. Three, four seconds? "Reaping time!" My internal stopwatch barely hits the 5 seconds mark when the pressure of his hands on my wrists dies out. His body, now a strengthless, rag doll, falls to my feet, like a bag of useless meat. "And you reap what you sow, mongrel!"
This is it. The dribble of saliva running down his chin confirms my fears, or should I say, expectations - he's cold out. Five seconds, huh? I wonder if it was the pain, or just the brain hitting it's own panic switch. Either way, my revenge here is done. The only thing that remains is...
"Awesome!" ah, one worry off my head. Marisa not only appears unaffected by the sight of her friend getting tortured like that, she also seems to be rather hyped up about the whole hassle. I admit, the way she'd rushed to his unconscious body, and started poking his cheeks with a finger was cute... in that sick, twisted way. Like a kid poking a carcass of a dog that's gotten driven over by a car. Which it, in a way, is. Only instead of a car, it was me who drove over poor Rinnosuke. Hah! Poor Rinnosuke! "Woah, he's cold out! For how long?"
"I wonder." frankly, I don't, but it's only natural to be polite "Couple of minutes, at best. An hour, at worst."
"Woah..."
But my goal lays elsewhere. Marisa can do whatever the hell she wishes to that bastard's body, I won't interfere. On the other hand, the other - forced - spectator matters much more. I turn to her.
"Reimu--"
But she's already there, just in front of me. I can't react when she grabs my collar and pushes me under the nearest wall. Her arm pins me to it with a force I'd have never expected her to use. Aw, a girl ought to be more gentle, Reimu!
"What. The hell. Do you think. You're doing?!"
I can't get enough of her angry face. Isn't it the second time she's asked me this today? And yet, her scowl still feels refreshing. Ah, such a satisfactory reaction. Wonderful. But, I cannot let myself wail in her anger just yet. An explanation would be proper.
"What I did," I state, as-a-matter-of-factly "Was use a temporary high-voltage, low-current electrical discharge to override Kourin's body's muscle-triggering mechanisms."
"Wha...?"
Her confusion is almost palpable. I steal a glance at Marisa, to confirm she's still busy with the poor bastard. And indeed she is. I take it it's only thanks to that Reimu's dared to push me up against a wall. Wasn't I just a villager a mere minute ago? Oh well, her hijinks are her own, I just want to admire her flustered face. I'm an anger-digger, Reimu! Your scowl only makes my resolve harder!
"In layman's terms," I raise a hand and clench it into a fist in front of her face "Bzzt."
And then, suddenly straighten my fingers. This'll have to suffice. I use this momentary distraction to break away from her gasp and dust off my clothes.
Surprisingly, no word of protest is spoken. Finally learning your place, eh, Reimu?
Either way, I've got to hurry. There's no saying when he might wake up, and to make any estimations regarding an incompletely human body like his would be foolish. All I can do is take chances... Or simply run away. Should he come back for vengeance later, I'd be prepared. I think.

[ ] First though, his vault! Raid it like an ancient tomb!
[ ] My business here is done, I may as well head off to the village.
--[ ] Reimu can stay, I should let her do as she pleases.
--[ ] Obviously, Reimu's going with me, whether she wants it or not. Kourin can take the witch. Savour it, bastard!
[ ] Victims! I need more victims! Marisa! She's going down!

==

YELLOW ON TOP OF YELLOW ON TOP OF YELLOW
TRY OUR NEW YELLOW NEON SCRIPT
WAKE UP WITH AN EYE CANCER


>>21524
>update Faggotry already

Actually, I've been trying to get Vodka to contribute... But he's resisting with a fervour worth of better cause.

[ ] First though, his vault! Raid it like an ancient tomb!

RAID THAT SHIT

[X] First though, his vault! Raid it like an ancient tomb!

[ ] My business here is done, I may as well head off to the village.
--[ ] Obviously, Reimu's going with me, whether she wants it or not. Kourin can take the witch. Savour it, bastard!

[x] First though, his vault! Raid it like an ancient tomb!
[x] My business here is done, I may as well head off to the village.
--[x] Reimu can stay, I should let her do as she pleases.
[x] Victims! I need more victims! Marisa! She's going down!

Let's combine that shit and make YAF write a WALL, he is bored anyway.

[X] First though, his vault! Raid it like an ancient tomb!
[ ] My business here is done, I may as well head off to the village.
--[ ] Obviously, Reimu's going with me, whether she wants it or not. Kourin can take the witch. Savour it, bastard!

[x] Knock out Marisa, raid Kourin's vault, grab Reimu by the hair like a caveman and make your way to the village.

Ah, to be a man~

[ ] My business here is done, I may as well head off to the village.
--[ ] Obviously, Reimu's going with me, whether she wants it or not. Kourin can take the witch. Savour it, bastard!

Perhaps she doesn't realize it yet, but she's already ours. And now, we're going to parade our possession around.

[x] First though, his vault! Raid it like an ancient tomb!

im in your shop stealin your wares

[x] My business here is done, I may as well head off to the village.
--[x] Obviously, Reimu's going with me, whether she wants it or not. Kourin can take the witch. Savour it, bastard!

Also we should get those clothes Reimu wanted. One would presume she didn't come here for fun/to get tasered.

[ ] My business here is done, I may as well head off to the village.
--[ ] Reimu can stay, I don't need her.

Changed my mind and vote. I remembered I don't want a Reimu route. We've already done it once when we were trying fot another route.

{X} My business here is done, I may as well head off to the village.
--{X} Obviously, Reimu's going with me, whether she wants it or not. Kourin can take the witch. Savour it, bastard!

[x] My business here is done, I may as well head off to the village.
--[x] Obviously, Reimu's going with me, whether she wants it or not. Kourin can take the witch. Savour it, bastard!

Either way, that's an issue for later, after I'm done with all the other hassle. Even if he wakes up in the vicinity of nearest minutes, I won't be here to receive a goodmorning punch in the nose for laughing in his face, and truth be told, I can't even be sure if he'd heard that I indeed do that... It's not easy to tell a person's reaction from another when he - or she - is getting electrocuted to oblivion, him not being an example for this principle, regardless of his - no matter how impudent it will make me sound - race. Youkai, half-youkai, human, none shall stand before the power of electricity. Wasn't science one of the reasons for Gensokyo's seclusion? I think I understand the circumstances behind it a little better now. Even with all the magic available to them, youkai wouldn't stand a chance against modern weaponry.
But I'm digressing - the pointless visit of mine to this place has to come to an end before my victim awakens, and since the estimated time await is unknown, I better scram ASAP. There's nothing else to do here anyway.
Smiling to myself, I hide the stun gun in one of my pant's pocket. I think I showed Kourin how dangerous stuff from the outside can be, there's no need for him to hold onto it. I, on the other hand, am more suited to handle it, being, you know, from the outside, and all that rubbish. Besides, I've been feeling rather naked, in a metaphorical sense, having nothing to defend myself with from any hypothetical assailants. With this, I'm armed, in a manner of speaking. Is this thievery? Found, not stolen, they say, and like I said, I'm doing him a favor this way. Two birds with one stone.
"Reimu," I turn to my angry miko, but find her not to be on the spot I last saw her on. Instead, she seems to be trying to avert Marisa's attention from Kourin. "Oh."
"Marisa, leave him-- leave him alone for a second, I say!" she tugs on the witch's collar, like if the latter was an unruly cat "Do you have any idea-- hey, I'm talking to you!"
Ahh, I can't help but grin at the scene. It's kind of regrettable, seeing her direct her precious anger at someone else, which is technically my fault, but the levels of adorability are mindblowing.
"I'm gonna paint on his face~" the black-white chants in a childish voice "Hm, what do you want, Reimu?"
"My clothes." the miko states coldly, no regard or sympathy for her unconscious friend at all. This is somehow satisfying. In a grim, malicious way. "Do you have any damn idea where they might be? I need them."
"Ah. Under the counter."
"God--" Reimu palms her face "He should've just said so..."
I can only observe as she steps over the defunct, and dives under the said piece of shop furniture, soon emerging back up, with a paper bag in her hands. It seems that my intentions to drag her out against her will were built in vain after all. Even so, I can't deny myself the pleasure of harassing her a little more. Does that make me a masochist? I wonder.
"Reimu," I pass by Marisa, mimicking the miko's indifference towards the unconscious bastard, then, before she's able to escape, grab her wrist "We're getting out of here."
Her infuriated eyes grant me a scowling look.
"That's the first reasonable thing I've heard from you today." yet, her words are heartening. Is she enjoying it after all? Perhaps, even I've not enough courage to dare and ask outright. "Though I'd appreciate it if--"
"Spare me."
Not paying heed to the protest I've just cut short before it had the chance to as much as come out, I begin dragging her outside. Still holding onto her wrist, the bag of clothes wagging around dangerously as we dash past the doorstep, and into - or should I say, out - the fray. Sunlight feels refreshing after the dusty interior of Kourin's house, if only it were a little bit colder... Ah, I may as well treat it's scorching temperature as a repentance for what I did to Reimu's - I think - friend. Nevertheless, the punishment he was struck with was a justified one. You play with the sword and die by the sword. Serves you right, bastard. Be grateful I didn't snatch the witch along the way as well. Even bastards need someone to love them, don't they? What do you think, Reimu?

Hackneyed platitudes aside, despite the lack of her protests, I can't concentrate my attention on merely braving the road, with her steadily following behind, bound by the binds of my fingers. No matter how... relaxing the atmosphere may be, I can't shake off the feeling... Though it's just a premonition... That there's something... No, perhaps someone, it would be only logical to assume an animal wouldn't be able to perform such sophisticated actions. Not to drag this any further anymore, I think we're being followed. Yet, every time I look back over my shoulder, all I see is Reimu averting her gaze, and no one else striding down along the road behind us. Neither on the trees. The bushes alongside the road provide too little cover for anyone to hide in them, which only reminds me of how I was the one attempting to do the very same thing mere half an hour ago. What a fool I was.
"I'm beginning to wonder," Reimu breaks my careful observation of surroundings, in a silent voice, devoid of the earlier irritation. What's with that? It's not like her to be so gentle, I was waiting on a completely different story! "Why exactly did I allow you to tag along."
"You didn't allow me," I remark as-a-matter-of-factly "I went against your orders, remember?"
"Ah, yes, I do, I do." she sighs "I should've just told you to piss off and stay at the shrine."
"That's not for me to judge." I return my stare to the sight ahead, giving up searching for what's probably just a stupid assumption of mine. Who the hell would want to follow us anyway? "But I agree, for some reason. You should have."
"Strange, to hear that coming from you."
"What can I say?" I give her a light shrug, without actually looking "I'm a nice guy."
"And this, even stranger."
"Still angry for being seen naked?"
"That's not--!" she begins to yell, but quickly mitigates herself, to my displeasure "Listen, get serious now. I can talk things out with Kourin, but we'll have to split before we reach the village."
This time I can't resist looking back at her, with an angry frown on my face. I haven't come all this way to simply let her go now.
"Why is that?"
Again, her eyes escape mine.
"Because I don't want any weird rumors. Look, I know you're worried," she pauses for a second "But I'm really fine. I'd taken worse things without flinching in the past, what you did wasn't really that serious."
She may brag, but losing consciousness is not to be taken lightly, as someone tried to teach me earlier today. Well, I'm a man, I can take whatever comes at me, but aren't you a girl, Reimu? Have more respect for yourself, for god's sake. For your sake. And for my sake as well. It would be a waste if you ended up dead before-- I mean, at such a young age. I'm being completely genuine here.
"If you say so." I still give her a nod "Still, I'm not convinced."
"Look, I'll forgive you everything you've done, just... You know, you've caused enough trouble for me today, slow down a little, would you kindly?" Gah! She's... She's right, I did cause trouble for her today, be it the incident with Kourin, or the stuff before. "I'll forgive you even this."

"This?" I blink a few, consecutive times "Meaning?"
She nods her chin at something between us.
"Ah." I see. This is what she was getting at. Weird, how at this exact moment, some sort of weird impulse had to kick in and make he finally let go of her wrist. Finally? Regrettably, finally, sadly, whatever adjective applies. "Er... Sorry."
She begins to massage it, though I think it's more for show than because I held it with too much strength. I know when to stop, unlike other people.
"Apology rejected." a shadow of a smile crosses her lips for a split second, only to be replaced with a scowling grimace "Like I said, if you want to be forgiven, and believe me, you do, let me get the shopping done by myself."
"Ehh." I sigh "Fine. Fine, go."
Because, do I really have a choice? Of course, I could always continue tugging on her nerves, but one has to know the limits of a spiteful play, and when to end it. She doesn't want any rumors to spread around, and I understand. She has her own reasons.
I can only grunt under my nose when she passes by me without a word.
"Oh, one more thing." Pardon, not without a word. In fact, when I turn to face her once more... "SHOVE IT!" All I manage to see is a glimpse of her thighs when a kick flies swiftly at my shoulder. Faced with such a sudden attack, I can only helplessly fall to the ground. "This is for defying my orders!"
"You--!"
But before I can even stand up, she's gone. Not even present anywhere around. How exactly--... Ah, she flew off. Only a distant figure of hers, surrounded by azure expanse remains to satiate my anger.
I stand up and dust off my clothes.
"Damn it." Wasn't it her herself who said it would be dangerous to fly today? Yet, here she goes, flying around in the burning sun. "What an ordeal."

This girl... just doesn't let it go.



...


It took me a while to get to the village, but when I finally reach it, my eyes are greet with a sight exactly fitting my fantasies. Or rather, the representation of it my mind came up with long ago. Classic, maybe even a bit cliche eighteenth century village, one a man from those times would see if he went countryside, though here and there, you can see signs of progress, despite the overall... Hm, shabbiness of the whole place. Rows of houses with thatched roofs are interlaced with houses of stone, most of the latter bearing signboards with easily recognizable pictures. Well, the most shocking part is that this place is incredibly large, and the dirty streets seem to be spanning on forever, leading into more and more advanced - or just the opposite, underdeveloped - districts, making one traversing them confused about not only his whereabouts, but about whenabouts as well. A historian would have a field day with this place. One can only wonder where exactly did all those people come from.
And I'm still being followed. Or rather, being paranoid about this weird premonition.
Somehow, this kind of environment makes me feel a little safer about the whole thing, be it being followed by some ghastly entity, or being alone in a foreign place in general. People passing by don't even seem to mind someone walking around in an outsider garment, bah, some of them appear to be wearing the same kind of modern clothes as me. Wonder if any of them are also former outsiders...
But it's not the time to be slouching around.

[ ] Isn't it obvious? I should find Reimu, and fast.
[ ] Why not have some time for myself? Stroll around, see if anything catches my attention.

{X} Why not have some time for myself? Stroll around, see if anything catches my attention.

Stroll~

[X] Why not have some time for myself? Stroll around, see if anything catches my attention.

[x] Why not have some time for myself? Stroll around, see if anything catches my attention.

Peruse the area.

[ ] Why not have some time for myself? Stroll around, see if anything catches my attention.

[x] Why not have some time for myself? Stroll around, see if anything catches my attention.

[x] Stroll around while looking for Reimu. Observing the shops, stalls, getting something to eat, etc.
[x] Keep a good distance when you do find her. Be ready to act like an idiot again at the first sign of Kourin-the-second.
[x] Wait until she's left the village to catch up and carry the bags for her. Tell her about your premonition.

[x] Why not have some time for myself? Stroll around, see if anything catches my attention.

[ ] Why not have some time for myself? Stroll around, see if anything catches my attention.

[x] Why not have some time for myself? Troll around, see if anyone gives me attention.

>>21555

Very clever.

[X] Why not have some time for myself? Stroll around, see if anything catches my attention.

I've no slightest idea what kind of entertainment awaits an outsider in those streets, but I assume I'll have to be satisfied with whatever it throws at me - despite the obvious possibility of looking for Reimu, I've almost overstayed my welcome in her vicinity. What she wanted was some time alone, and it's perfectly understandable. No matter how you look at it, even if she's only engaging in bigotry, there's still an image she has to keep up, lest her reputation shall be razed to the ground. After all, doesn't she depend on those people? In one way or another, more or less legal, but undoubtedly, she's not the kind to take up on a part-time job to stitch the holes in her budget. Why do I even know that? I just know, no use in thinking about it.
"Well, bring it on!" I throw my arms aside, and scream, regardless of the weird looks other pedestrians might give me "Entertain me, world!"
No answer from anyone or anything. I can only snort angrily, and having hid one hand in a pocket - the very same containing my newly acquired weapon, begin strolling down the street, without any particular destination. Come to think of it, we haven't ascertain the time or place of meeting after she's done...

What a super loop, basses from human mouths, whoop whoop! All the street noises entangle together and form something resembling a grand, yet chaotic music, finding it's way to absorb any noises present and willing to be assimilated. Give me cables, I'll urge on the marauders, through sudden knee movements! By a feign, I'll fall into the rhythm, to catch those of rebellious nature, give pressure on their throats to enforce the musical rapture! Further unfolding I fathom, forest of hands raised in the air, underground ring I serve, in it's subculture, like Ytong in a wall, snake in a new skin, and oh, and oh, and oh, for as long as possible. With a sound different than all the others, I merge with the mumbling crowd, a mess of varying clothes and voices, and join them in their rush towards the place where destinies are made. It's amazing! - before I even grasp it all, the tracks are already engraved in the sand! Only a few passerbys, in themselves they're nothing, but together they're a river.


A river I break out from, to catch a breath, as well as some additional sanity for my overwhelmed mind.
"What the hell's up with that?" I swear, they came out of nowhere and immediately caught me in their idle grip. Almost like if you'd surrounded a woman with a dense wall of bees and ordered them to force the body inside the swarm according to his whim. Somehow I can't shake off the feeling I've heard that somewhere before. A movie? Perhaps, they'd do everything to scare the viewer these days, even if it's something as obscure as bees. I can walk, I can walk alright. I could walk for hours, but not so fast! My abilities are wrapped around a different spool. What can I say? What can I utter? Perhaps something about the store in front of me would do. "Rapture!"
Indeed, the sight is heartening, to say the least. The building itself may not be impressive, but what I see in it's window makes my heart race. Women? To devil with women! This shop has swords! Axes! Rapiers, schavionas, berdiches, maces, tools of destruction! Of sowing sadness! Oh, if only I could lay my hands upon one of these babies...
But here comes the realization! Not only can I wish to touch their handles, slide my fingers along their smooth pommels, because, behold! The shop is right in front of me!
With smiling face, and - I'm sure - glistering eyes, I quickly enter the wondrous store.

If happiness could be given a form, shape and a colour, those things would be it's embodiments. Every single one marked with care and love their creator put into making them, with papillary lines of steel, shining dimly in the sunlight smartly finding it's way inside. The air is soaked in oily aroma, filling my lungs with joy. I'm in heaven! I'm in seventh heaven! My fingers are itching to caress their handles! Prolong the day, I want to spend eternity in this heavenly garden!
Yet, even in a moment of ascension, I retain my common sense. I'm not their owner, and to respect someone else's property would be only polite, especially when it comes to weapons. I know I wouldn't like someone laying his dirty, greasy fingers upon a shiny blade of my sword... That is, if I had one. The only thing I possess right now is this wretched paralyzer. Useless junk! If only I could get a sword! Danger! A curse has befallen earth! Sent down on the society! It's called 'scientific progress'! One of the merits of stalling a place's time is this - survival of the more delicate traditions. Were it on the outside, those miracles of forgery would've ended up in a museum, never to be used again. Heresy, nothing but a terrible misunderstanding no one seems to notice.
"Velcome!" a terribly accented voice shifts my attention from the rapturous spectacle in front of me, to it's owner "Velcome to my humble stove!" Master! - I scream, or at least wish I would have enought courage to do so. The guy himself might be obese and look shabby, but his hands are marked with professionalism. I can tell, without actually asking. Those are all his creations. "Hov can I helv you?"
"Help me," I look him in the eye, stigmatized with hundreds of hours spent over a blasting furnace "Rhapsodize my ravishment!"
"Ah," he scratches his beart "Terrivly sovvy, vut I can't helv you vit' this. But I appreviate the roundavout compliment, heh heh." He looks like a kind-hearted grandfather, smiling over his child wooing over a story he's just told. Annoying as it would be under normal circumstances, I want to give him a hug right now. "So, yer lookin vor anyving specivic?"
Or should he say: EVERYTHING specific! If I had my choice, I'd buy each and every single of those masterpieces. Transportation? Screw that noise! To find myself in possession of so many beautiful weapons would send my soul to Elysian Fields!
Yet, my wallet shines with empty space. And those weapons can't be cheap. No, they shouldn't be cheap. Ah, how I wish I were rich right now!

[ ] "Ah!" sigh with resignation "Woe is me! Wouldn't you happen to have something... For those with a thinner wallet?"
[ ] Commit the uncommitable! Forever shall my soul be stained with sin, but I can't get my eyes off those weapons!
[ ] "Ah, no..." look to the floor "I'm afraid I cannot afford any of these... Though I'd appreciate being able to hold onto them, if only for a minute!"

==

Again, pardon the form. My current mood isn't exactly suitable for writing, yet, obligation prevails.

[ ] "Ah!" sigh with resignation "Woe is me! Wouldn't you happen to have something... For those with a thinner wallet?"

[x] Commit the uncommitable! Forever shall my soul be stained with sin, but I can't get my eyes off those weapons!
[x] AKA knock the motherfucker out and raid the store.
[x] Run like hell; don't wait up for Reimu.
[x] When you get to the shrine, hide your stash somewhere safe.

[x] Commit the uncommitable! Forever shall my soul be stained with sin, but I can't get my eyes off those weapons!

We already own everything in the world so yeah!

[x] "Ah!" sigh with resignation "Woe is me! Wouldn't you happen to have something... For those with a thinner wallet?"

Thievery? Go die, Anon. We can be a jackass next playthrough. At least try to have some dignity in this one.

>>21563
>We can be a jackass next playthrough. At least try to have some dignity in this one.

You voted to assault Reimu in her bathroom, use Suika as a meat shield, and to sneak in through somebody's window. You have no room to talk.

[ ] Commit the uncommitable! Forever shall my soul be stained with sin, but I can't get my eyes off those weapons!

And our treasure increases...

[ ] Commit the uncommitable! Forever shall my soul be stained with sin, but I can't get my eyes off those weapons!

How are you going to carry all that stuff?

>>21568

You're not thinking with borders; though, to be honest, the idea of lugging around a box overfilled with implements of war is pretty funny.

[x] Commit the uncommitable! Forever shall my soul be stained with sin, but I can't get my eyes off those weapons!

And yet these hands will never hold anything.

>>21565
I didn't vote to actually go in there, I came around when we were already there. So I just chose the funny option. Besides, I like to think trying not to get killed (Ibuki shield) is leagues better than petty theft.

>>21570

It isn't petty theft. We are simply taking what would have eventually belonged to us pre-maturely.

>So I just chose the remorseless scumbag option when there were options given to walk away without doing anything to her.

Fixed. "Because I thought it was funny" is not good enough. You cannot justify that, period.

And whether or not that's better or worse than theft doesn't matter to me, at all. They're two different shades of scumbaggery, and you should feel bad for calling people out on one just recently after doing another.

[ ] "Ah, no..." look to the floor "I'm afraid I cannot afford any of these... Though I'd appreciate being able to hold onto them, if only for a minute!"
--> [ ] Commit the uncommitable! Forever shall my soul be stained with sin, but I can't get my eyes off those weapons!

>>21572

I'm not saying my reason was a good one, that's just why. I was going to choose the option that got her towel for her, but I saw the funny/crazy option and I wondered what would come of it.

>You should feel bad...
I don't really because I'm not terribly serious about what I say: I just type on a whim. I don't feel anger towards people who have a different opinion than me, because that's just stupid. Though I can see how I can come off as someone who just hates everyone who disagrees with them, so for that I apologize.

It's cute that you have a picture to go along with your emotion. What else is in the collection? (not meant to be an angry, sarcastic comment, in case you took it as such)

>What else is in the collection?

Nothing.

I was looking on Danbooru for that one picture where Shiki makes a grimace and points her thumb down, and she was drawn in a style similar to Hellsing. However, I didn't have the patience, so I just picked the next best thing instead. It seemed to fit the occasion.

[x] Commit the uncommitable! Forever shall my soul be stained with sin, but I can't get my eyes off those weapons!

Gates of Babylon

[x] "Ah!" sigh with resignation "Woe is me! Wouldn't you happen to have something... For those with a thinner wallet?"

Well if you don't like swords, we can always do it the hard way.

Does the dog come with a scabbard and shield? I'd vote to steal those if we can. Also, do the bees only attack furries, or can we get them to attack youkai?

In what way is that the hard way? That's the best weapon that takes nearly no skill to use next to a gun. But I'm not sure we can afford a bee-eating dog on our budget. How much do they go for anyway? ...what does Gensokyo use as money?

>>21580

The idea of a dog-scabbard is amusing, but... Yeah, there ought to be a limits to craziness. And Gensokyo uses Yen, or so do we all believe.

==

[x] Commit the uncommitable! Forever shall my soul be stained with sin, but I can't get my eyes off those weapons!

Even so, what is my indigence compared to the prospect of taking hold of these? One has to ask himself a question - is the price in money appropriate for this kind of commodity? The answer is: no! - while their creator requires funds not only to live on, but to keep up his profession as well, staining such marvellous creations with the filth of something as unclean as money is clearly wrong! Therefore! I am only doing the world a favour by this!
"I wonder." I slide a hand along my face, if only to buy myself enough time to hide that atrocious smirk "Yet before we get down to business, I wouldn't forgive myself if I didn't congratulate my contractor his artistry."
"Ahaha!" the poor fool-- I mean Master - scratches his beard while chuckling in a troubled manner "It's noving that gveat, really!"
"Nevertheless," I reach out a palm "You deserve my praises."
He bites the bait. Completely. With that stupid smile plastered all over his face, or rather, on the closely unidentified surface underneath his thick facial hair. The moment our hands clasp, I strengthen my grip as much as possible - it is only proper for men to exchange strong handshakes, is it not? Almost too easy. Funny, how he didn't notice me suspiciously holding the other hand in my pocket all the time... Perhaps the excuse I used at Kourin's place wasn't really authentic after all? Well, that's in the past, Kane, my man.
"Like I saivd, it's not a vig--guh?!"
Gasp. Gasp and groan. It's the only thing he can do when I pull him closer, tripping him over the counter. He may be a stout man, but no matter the posture, none shall stand before the power of a surprise attack. Regardless of their gender or profession. Hah, despite being an artist, he's still as stupid as everyone else. It's almost pitiable, to see his eyes widen when I put the stun gun against his nape. From a master to a mongrel, in less than two seconds. I'm getting good at this.
"Rest assured." I flick the switch to MAX with a swift movement of my thumb "Your wares are in good hands."

The sounds of his limbs banging against everything around are drowned out by my laughter.


Still, even after his body slides behind the counter with a loud thump, I've not enough time to celebrate. Someone is bound to come sooner or later, and despite the brilliance of my plan, only now do I notice a giant, gaping hole I've left in one of the neuralgic spots. See, no matter how much I might've secured the process of acquiring those weapons, how am I to... Carry them? No, perhaps, there's a way. After all, his clients can't be simply walking out with swords in their hands. That'd look... stupid. There ought to be something, boxes, or whatever, I could use.
I steal a glance out the store, to ensure no one is looking, and having noticed no human in sight, leap over the counter, careful not to step on Master's body.
"Ah." And it turns out I wasn't mistaken. Inside the hollow space under the table top, there's a single, large, black case. It looks almost out of place, being painted in black, having sturdy, steel hinges and whatnot. Nevertheless, I can't afford to admire it now. Instead, I pull it out and place it on the counter. Hm, there's a lock, but it appears to be open. "Hm."
But just when I raise the lid...
"My word!" A voice, from nowhere! Curses, have I been discovered?! My body jumps back on it's own, hand on the stun gun, in case of any assailants. "It's been ages, but I finally have company!"
But there's no one around. Even the brief look into the backroom yields no results. There's no living soul in the store, aside from me.
"Madness!" I mutter to myself "What magic is this!"
"T'is no magic, friend!" the voice sounds anew, filling me with another surge of fright "T'is merely the happiness of seeing daylight again!"
Am I going insane? I admit, it sounds kind of... distant, but hasn't it just answered my question? And it sure does not come from inside my head. Illusions? Some sort of twisted thievery countermeasure?
"Who," I say through clenched teeth "Show yourself."
"But I'm already there, friend!" it states, and I swear it sounds amused "Look into the case."
Reluctantly, but so I do, expecting to see maybe a set of speakers, wired to a miniature tape recorder, maybe a short-wave radio, or - though it's the least possible of possibilities - a miniature man dressed in green, smoking a pipe. Yet, everything I see in the silk-coated interior of the case is a... A sword. Only this, and nothing more.
"You're..." I begin to ask, only to be interrupted mid-way through a breather.
"Salutations!" 'it' calls "Are you my master?"
"What..."
I've never seen anything like it before. The sheath itself reminds me that of the eastern design, wooden, long and painted in black darker than tar, ending in an expanded section, a lever-rifle-style handguard adorning it's edge. The whole thing appears to be there only to hold the basket hilt of the sword in place. There's also a metal rail stretched along the sheath, protruding from the aforementioned lever-like guard. Whoever made this thing, lived under a crooked roof.
"Oh, I beg you, give me the pleasure!" the sword... if it's really the sword... breaks my examination with the same kind of joyful tone "Are you my master? What's your name?"
"Er, Koganeiro." I answer, more on a reflex than out of politeness "Koganeiro Nanatsuyoru. Kane, for short."
"Right, then!" it seems to be satisfied with the answer "My name is Sid! Sid the Sword, if you will!"
I frown.
"I've never heard anything about a sword named Sid."
"I've never heard anything about a guy named Koganeiro either, so we're even!" Impudent thing. How dare it... No, in the first place, why am I not surprised about a sword talking back to me? There's something definitely wrong with that, yet I can't shake off the feeling that this sword indeed can talk. However stupid that sounds. "So, are we going somewhere? I'm sick of this case."

[ ] "Ah, sure. But on one condition." point a finger at it's face... er, hilt "No talking unless asked, got it?"
--[ ] On a second thought, this one will suffice. Let's hope it's capable of something more than just shooting it's mouth off.
--[ ] I've got a case, what's there to do, other than filling it with arms?
[ ] "No way. I'm not gonna carry around a talking sword. Forget about it."
--[ ] Throw it away, and let other weapons take it's place inside the case.
--[ ] I changed my mind. I'll arm myself in a less... crazy place.

[x] "Ah, sure. But on one condition." point a finger at it's face... er, hilt "No talking unless asked, got it?"
--[x] I've got a case, what's there to do, other than filling it with arms?

It's not about how you use them, it's about how many you got.

[X] "Ah, sure. But on one condition." point a finger at it's face... er, hilt "No talking unless asked, got it?"
--[X] On a second thought, this one will suffice. Let's hope it's capable of something more than just shooting it's mouth off.

{X} "Ah, sure. But on one condition." point a finger at it's face... er, hilt "No talking unless asked, got it?"
--{X} I've got a case, what's there to do, other than filling it with arms?

mooore.

[x] "Ah, sure. But on one condition." point a finger at it's face... er, hilt "No talking unless asked, got it?"
--[x] I've got a case, what's there to do, other than filling it with arms?

I've got a feeling that that guy would've given us this sword regardless of which of the three options we picked.

{X} "Ah, sure. But on one condition." point a finger at it's face... er, hilt "No talking unless asked, got it?"
--{X} I've got a case, what's there to do, other than filling it with arms?

>>21586
>I've got a feeling that that guy would've given us this sword regardless of which of the three options we picked.

I won't hide it - you would've received it, sooner or later. One way or the other. Kourin's vault would've had it (along with a bunch of other freaky stuff), Reimu would've taken it from Kourin as a souvenir for 'a friend', if you'd left her alone, it would've miraclously appeared out of nowhere, possibly due to a - gasp! - newfound power, Mima would've conjured it up - the possibilies are endless. Your freedom is an illusion. It's always been like this in CYOAs. If the author has a plan he wants to set in motion, he will, regardless of your actions. Unless the said actions make it impossible for the events to start or proceed as planned. So, to keep it brief - you would've received it either way, only under different circumstances... And at different cost. For example, you might need the money for later, or should I say, for the nearest future, as I've planned a real nice point in the programme after this. Which I'll make sure to deny you, should you decide to go on screwing my plans up, and of course, inform you afterwards of what you've missed on.

Treat the attached picture as a mean of soothening the overtone of my rant.

[x] "Ah, sure. But on one condition." point a finger at it's face... er, hilt "No talking unless asked, got it?"
--[x] I've got a case, what's there to do, other than filling it with arms?

Who needs GoB when we have the Infinite One Sword style?

{X} "Ah, sure. But on one condition." point a finger at it's face... er, hilt "No talking unless asked, got it?"
--{X} I've got a case, what's there to do, other than filling it with arms?

Or maybe this talking sword is actually a spatial key that lets us access the wealth of our vault.

>Which I'll make sure to deny you, should you decide to go on screwing my plans up, and of course, inform you afterwards of what you've missed on.

Self-parody much?

>>21592

I have no idea what it is you're trying to convey.

[x] "Ah, sure. But on one condition." point a finger at it's face... er, hilt "No talking unless asked, got it?"
--[x] I've got a case, what's there to do, other than filling it with arms?

[x] "Ah, sure. But on one condition." point a finger at it's face... er, hilt "No talking unless asked, got it?"
--[x] I've got a case, what's there to do, other than filling it with arms?

Now, really, a talking sword? Where the hell did this one come from? In the first place, why would a respectable craftsman like Master - who is now laying on the floor like a rag doll, mind you - keep such a thing under his counter? This is but great and confusing foolery, the concept alone would make any sane person cringe. I mean, who in the deepest pits of hell would want his weapon to comment on his actions? Look at the muscles on you! Hey, that cut was cool, can you swing me one more time? Um, you should've aimed at his shoulder. Bullshit! Nevertheless, even if it talks, and has a ridiculous sheath, I can't help but want to grab a hold of it's grip and at least, at least measure it in my hands. Just to feel it.
So why not abide by that silly wish? It's not like it's going to bite - just the opposite, it seems to be quite eager to get out of that case, and hell, I can somehow understand it. No one would like to be kept in a silky coffin forever. Then, with utmost care, I raise it out of it's prison. The rail on the scabbard shines ominously in the vestigial sunlight, so does the guard.
"Ah." it utters a silent gasp, as if surprised to be touched so boldly. I can't help but frown.
"One weird sound," and cast it a threatening look "And I'll kill you."
Weird, but it seems to shiver once under my fingers. I wonder if it was just an illusion.
"No," it replies, it's tone a bit... should I say, unsure? "I don't swing that way, master, it's just..."
Ah. I get it. Like all weapons, it yearns for touch. Yearns to be used. Used in battle, drink the blood of their wielder's foes, penetrate their flesh, let the blood flow down their fullers. Primitive, yet so beautiful wish of a tool. How come I can perfectly understand it despite being human? It's instinctive, if you must know. Sid, huh..."It's not a good name, but even a sword deserves a little bit of... autonomy from time to time. Especially if it possesses self-awareness.
My fingers slide into the guard on the scabbard without a problem. What purpose does it serve, I'll discover later. The other hand grabs the grip, just below the basket pommel. The leather brushes nicely against my fingertips, sharing it's anticipation with me, as if thought it were connected straight to my head, straight... to my soul. I swear I saw the decorations glimmer impatiently.
"Well then..."
Sudden, forceful pull, and the blade's been freed from it's wooden shelter. Steel vibrates vividly in the stale, dusty air, filling my ears with tangible ringing. I'm amazed. The weight is just perfect. It's center balanced properly, allowing me to swing it around with minimal effort. Almost like if it were an extension of my arm. Swing. Pull. Thrust.
It's magnificent. A pleased sigh escapes my lips against my will.
"My," Sid sounds mildly annoyed "I've already told you I don't swing that way, haven't I?" Grimacing, I slide him back into the scabbard and knock it's handle against the counter. If only the personality would fit the perfection of the blade itself... "Ow."
"Look," I try to make my voice sound menacing "I thought you wanted to get taken?"
"Sure, sure!" it's eager nodding is almost palpable "T'was my wish for all these years!"
"Alright." I sigh while strapping the damn thing to my belt. Ironically, it doesn't restrict my movements at all. "I'll take you."
"Excellent!"
"But on one condition."
Somehow, the light reflections on the pommel get darker for a second.
"Oh." it groans dishearteningly "Well, what is it? Name it."
I point a finger at that little piece of steel. Should I call it it's face? No, wouldn't the blade rather be one? I'm confused.
"No. Talking. Unless. Asked."
A moment of silence ensues.
"Um..." yet, he's not satisfied "Not even, you know, a hello if I see someone familiar?"
"Why would you--" I palm my face "No."
"No chatting with master's friends?"
"No. Fuck, no."
I can only imagine Reimu's reaction if she hears a sword comment on her features. In a way, isn't he more safe than I am? After all, steel ought to be more resistant to... hm, physical violence than human flesh...
"Aww. Oh, well. Let it be so. I'll keep quiet like a mouse under a broom!"
I can only hope so.

After filling the big, black case with whatever I thought could come in handy - which means, pretty much every single better looking sword in the store - I shut close it's lid and slid it's bar. I'd also like to lock it, but the key is nowhere to be seen. It'll have to suffice, I guess. Surprisingly, it's not any heavy. I mean, the weight of the wood is still noticeable, but everything inside is... Nope, checking the bottom revealed no holes, so it's still inside... Ah, another one of so many of Gensokyo's wonders! Well, no crap, if someone wanted to seal a talking sword, obviously he would do it using a magical case. Any other way could turn out to be inefficient.
Speaking of the bastard, I must commend his willpower, keeping quiet for all this time, while I'm sure he'd have much to say about my doings. Well, I'm only doing those things a favour, helping them escape the eternal grasp of wooden racks.
Anyway, here's hoping no one pays attention to a guy leaving a store with a giant case on his back.

...


Back in the streets, it is. And still crowded as ever. Again and again, random pedestrians bump against my shoulders, and against the luggage I'm bravely dragging around, despite the utmost difficulty of getting it through any denser group of people. Oh well, if someone gets hit in the face by hard wood, it's their fault for not getting out of the way. Bah, they should appreciate it I didn't simply cut my way through!
Either way, I'm done with 'shopping', and have noting in schedule for the rest of the afternoon. Reimu is nowhere to be seen, and I doubt she'd have a cellphone on her, so I could give her a call. Even if, I don't have her number. But it's rather foolish, isn't it? I need to stop thinking in outsider terms. What then, magical carrier pigeons? Or should I simply stand around with crossed arms until she finds me? Though, knowing her, she'd fly off on her own, without worrying about me.
"..." 'Knowing her', eh? Haven't I met her, like... a couple of hours ago? Of course, I knew about her already, an outline of her profile, a few facts, but... Somehow, having faced the real thing wasn't any surprising. Dare I say, she was exactly as I had expected her to be. Only... Well, her personality appears a bit, I don't know, bipolar? She can switch between anger and calamity in a split-second, that's for sure. "... huh?" My eyes catch a glimpse of something suspicious in the crowd. No, it can't be... Yet, I doubt there's any other orange-haired, horned, little girl in the village. It was only a brief sight, but... I'm sure I saw her. "Hey...! Ugh." someone walks right into my case again "Suika...!" Success! She stops, only her horns protruding from the mass of people, turning around - I suppose - along with her head, looking for the one who's just called out her name. "Goddamnit... Stand aside!" That's enough. No use being polite anymore. Time to make use of this free elbow. "Shove it, mongrels!" someone falls to the ground, hit by this how evil part of my body "Out the way!"

And before I know, I'm in front of the mischievous oni, gasping angrily.
"What a bunch of... Er, hello, Suika."
I wasn't mistaken, it was Suika after all. Well, only good for my nerves, had it turned out to be someone else, I'd have become engulfed in flames of rage already. She gives me a strange look, combined with numerous blinks.
"Where's Reimu?"
Huh? A frown crosses my face. What kind of question is that?
"I dunno." my answer is honest, if not a little careless "Why?"
"Weren't you two supposed to be on a da--mf!" she falls silent, attacked by her own palms, forcefully closing her mouth "Mmf! Mmfmf!"
Oh, this is simply ridiculous. Cute, but ridiculous. Weren't we supposed to be on a... what?
I smile reassuringly, and gently pull her little hands off her face.
"Now," if there's a way of putting pure love into one's stare, I'm attempting it right now. She's simply too adorable not to feel happy around her. "What was it about me and Reimu?"
"Nothing!" she yells, her cheeks getting redder with every second "I'm totally not a secret agent sent to spy on you two having a date!"
"Ahh."
So that's it. Of course, having said that, Suika mitigates herself by closing her own mouth yet again. Oh, how adorable. But... Me and Reimu... On a date, huh? Why do I have a feeling I know whose doing this gossip is?

[ ] "A date, huh... Well, don't know about Reimu, but what about a date with Suika?"
[ ] "Mm, well, if I were a secret agent, I'd help my target find his miko first. Before spying on him having a date, that is."

[ ] "A date, huh... Well, don't know about Reimu, but what about a date with Suika?"

[x] "Mm, well, if I were a secret agent, I'd help my target find his miko first. Before spying on him having a date, that is."

[x] "Mm, well, if I were a secret agent, I'd help my target find his miko first. Before spying on him having a date, that is."
[x] "Oh and carry this stuff for me? Thanks bunches."

[x] "Mm, well, if I were a secret agent, I'd help my target find his miko first. Before spying on him having a date, that is."

Oh god, a wise cracking magic sword? That is so...so...so..

AWSOME

Also, dammit anon! I thought we agreed on not mugging random fucking people!

[ ] "Ah, sure. But on one condition." point a finger at it's face... er, hilt "No talking unless asked, got it?"
--[ ] On a second thought, this one will suffice. Let's hope it's capable of something more than just shooting it's mouth off.

Lets at least make him thing we didn't take anything and that he imagined the whole ordeal?

{X} "Mm, well, if I were a secret agent, I'd help my target find his miko first. Before spying on him having a date, that is."

>>21604

Please disregard. Dammit YAF and your ninja updating skills

>>21606

Dude, just click the little box next to your post and delete it.

[ ] "A date, huh... Well, don't know about Reimu, but what about a date with Suika?"

Oh, c'mon! This must win!

[x] "A date, huh... Well, don't know about Reimu, but what about a date with Suika?"

[x] "Mm, well, if I were a secret agent, I'd help my target find his miko first. Before spying on him having a date, that is."

[x] "Mm, well, if I were a secret agent, I'd help my target find his miko first. Before spying on him having a date, that is."

[x] "A date, huh... Well, don't know about Reimu, but what about a date with Suika?"

This.

[x] "A date, huh... Well, don't know about Reimu, but what about a date with Suika?"

[x] "A date, huh... Well, don't know about Reimu, but what about a date with Suika?"

Only because we need more face time with the awesome oni, and its bound to fluster Reimu even more.

[x] "A date, huh... Well, don't know about Reimu, but what about a date with Suika?"

[x] "A date, huh... Well, don't know about Reimu, but what about a date with Suika?"

I like YAF's Suika more than his Reimu.

This can be related to his general situation somehow, but I'm not sure just how, yet.

[ ] "Mm, well, if I were a secret agent, I'd help my target find his miko first. Before spying on him having a date, that is."

[x] "A date, huh... Well, don't know about Reimu, but what about a date with Suika?"

damn hard choice there

[x] "Mm, well, if I were a secret agent, I'd help my target find his miko first. Before spying on him having a date, that is."

Miko miko ni shite ageru?

[x] "Mm, well, if I were a secret agent, I'd help my target find his miko first. Before spying on him having a date, that is."

[x] "A date, huh... Well, don't know about Reimu, but what about a date with Suika?"

[x] "A date, huh... Well, don't know about Reimu, but what about a date with Suika?"

Suika~

[x] "A date, huh... Well, don't know about Reimu, but what about a date with Suika?"

[x] "A date, huh... Well, don't know about Reimu, but what about a date with Suika?"

Sure isn't multiple voting in here.

==

[X] "A date, huh... Well, don't know about Reimu, but what about a date with Suika?"

It seems that a certain ghost is determined to spy on me, in my free time nonetheless, and while there would be no problem with it, should she come herself, instead, she's using the poor, silly oni do to the dirty job for her. How shameful! What kind of rotten brain would come up with the idea of exploiting this cute face's credulity? Look at her blush at having revealed her secret by an accident! Mima, you might be a ghost, but jam a screwdriver up my ass if you're not a witch also. But this presents us with quite a nice opportunity, doesn't it? Time to foil some of the ghost's plans... And have a bit of fun while we're at it.
I lean closer towards the furiously blushing Suika.
"A date, huh..."
"It's nothing! I said nothing!" she insists in a troubled voice "It was just a joke! Please, don't tell Mima! Boo..."
Oh man, she's on the verge of crying. As disheartening as it would normally be to see her cry, right now, I can only feel this kind of fuzzy tingling inside my chest. Is this... the power of the oni? God my witness, if it wasn't for all the people around and the burden on my back, I'd have already snatched her into a tight embrace. Talk about being silly.
"Well," I touch my nose with the free hand "I don't know about Reimu... But say," then crouch, and raise Suika's chin, looking her in the eyes "What about a date with Suika?"
She only blinks a few times, and points a finger at her own face. The tears in the corners of her eyes add to the already mindblowing douceur of the scene. One more cute gesture like that, and I swear my chest's going to explode with colourful confetti. Oh god, how I want to hug her.
"M-me?"
"Mhm." I nod "Reimu isn't here anyway, and frankly, I think a date with Suika would be much funnier. Don't you think so too, yourself?"
"R-really?"
How I wish I had a tissue right now, to wipe those tears of that cute face. Ah, pity, her own sleeve will have to suffice.
"Of course," I say, while rubbing her eyelids "If it's about dates, I'm sure Suika is the greatest partner possible!"
The reaction is more heartwarming than it is possible to convey in words - I swear, her adorability is god-sent. No way mother nature alone would be able to create something so... so... So huggable. I find myself amazed at the fact I'm still standing firm despite the continous, desperate calls coming from just below my heart.
"So..." one last time, she rubs her face in a childish way "You want to go on a date... with Suika?"
Who in the world could oppose this expression? I know I can't.
"Yes."
And she returns my smile.
"Yay~"
Her cheer is a bit weak, but happy nonetheless, happy enough to fill my soul with vivid light. Reimu? She wanted a private time of her own, let her have it! It's not like she's anywhere around anyway, and searching for her would be stupid. Like searching for a child in a supermarket. Pointless. Besides, who needs that angry miko when there's someone of Suika's level at my side? So, without regret, I give the oni my arm, which she eagerly takes, immediately climbing it like a rope, and finally ending up sitting on my shoulders. Her little hands pat my head happily.
"Nihi~ let's go~!"
I sigh, for the first time this day, cheerfully.


So, with an oni on my shoulders, a case full of swords on my back, I dive into the crowd again. Who values his life, quickly removes himself, in fear of losing it, be it due to Suika's chains, case's edges, or my own elbows. Like this, we pave our way, towards a place where we could sit down and relax a bit.


God, I'm one bad-ass motherfucker.


...


Well, this isn't exactly how I imagined our date would look. No offense to the girl herself, but it seems that her idea of a date consists of a shabby pub, dirty tables, and lots - and I mean lots - of alcohol. The pile of empty mugs in front of her already reaches up to her face, while I still haven't finished a half of mine. Ah, regrettable. But, she looks happy, and so should I. Good thing I had some of Gensokyo's currency on me, just in case. No, rather, it was one of the many preparations made by me beforehand.
"Yaah~!" with a happy groan, she slams another just emptied cup on the tabletop "Nothin' like some human drinks every now and again~. Am I right, Iro?"
"Iro?" I stop circling my finger along my cup's edge and look at Suika's flushed face, to which she responds by letting another giggle "Why Iro?"
"Iro," she leans towards me with what I take is supposed to be a seductive smile on her face "Means 'lover'."
"Lover..." I return my eyes to the half-full cup of mine "So I'm Suika's lover, huh?"
"Nihihi~ Suika's lover~"
Oh well, if this causes any misunderstandings, at least her happy face is more than worth suffering the hypothetical repercussions. Besides, Suika's lover? That sounds proud, and she was the one who came up with it, at that. Shouldn't I rejoice? Damn right I should. Throw away the disappointment and join her in the drinking race. The chances of winning are close to zilch, but to hell with it!
Time to take a dive.
"Ouch, for the love of-- Master!"
I almost spit my beer when Sid speaks up, may I add, mid-way through a gulp. Startled, I dive under the table and 'face' my newly acquired, faithful companion.
"Oi, didn't I tell you to shut up?"
Here's hoping my whispers aren't loud enough for Suika to hear them.
"Certainly, but master, try to drink more carefully! You're spilling corrosive liquids on my sheath!" he replies, in a rather disgruntled tone "At least wipe it off, for god's sake!"
It dares to make demands? What a great and intoxicating impudence, how-- No, perhaps he's right. Hell, I did spill some beer on him, I admit. God damn, I swear I took the utmost care not to do anything like that. Er... But what should I use to--
"Uoo." a sudden voice interrupts my contemplation "Who're you talking to, Iro~?"
"Gah!"
She's here! I almost jump back, but stop myself in the last moment. This could have gotten ugly real fast, should I knock my head on the table or... No, wait, why is she here? Oh right, she must have overheard my conversation with... Ugh...

[ ] "... fine. Sid, introduce yourself."
[ ] "Nevermind that." give Sid a silencing jab "Back to our date, though..."
--[ ] "How about we talk for a bit? About you, for example."
--[ ] "How about we talk for a bit? About Reimu, for example."
--[ ] "Are you sure you can take in this much? It's all rather strong stuff."
[ ] "Who? No one! No one at all! Hey, did the news get around about a guy named Butcher Sid? Oh, Sid just flew into this town, and he's chopping on all the manly men's meat!"

[x] "... fine. Sid, introduce yourself."

Sid, voiced by Sean Connery.

{X} "... fine. Sid, introduce yourself."

[x] "... fine. Sid, introduce yourself."
--[x] "How about we talk for a bit? About you, for example."
--[x] "How about we talk for a bit? About Reimu, for example."

Multi voting powers, activate. Form of: A wall.

[ ] "... fine. Sid, introduce yourself."

[ ] "... fine. Sid, introduce yourself."

Ugh, I shouldn't read my own stuff. It only ruins my enthusiasm.

Have a picture of a black case, with a red cross painted on it.

[x] "... fine. Sid, introduce yourself."

>Sid, voiced by Sean Connery
Well, you just destroyed everything I liked about Sid. Now every time he has a line, Sean Connery is going to voice it in my head and ruin the experience.

[X] "Who? No one! No one at all! Hey, did the news get around about a guy named Butcher Sid? Oh, Sid just flew into this town, and he's chopping on all the manly men's meat!"

Oh come on, have some fun with it.

[x] "... fine. Sid, introduce yourself."

... with a sword. Yeah, I'm talking with a goddamn sword, one I've recently stolen from a master blacksmith, just a couple o' blocks down that way, along with a buncha other stuff, now resting in the case, peacefully leaning against the nearest wall. Now that I think about it, I ought to hurry up with whatever else is there to do in the village, lest my crime-- pardon, my forced favour is going to catch up to me... And the consequences won't be pleasant. I doubt those village hardhats would be able to fathom the true form of my actions, let alone understanding the concept of an unused weapon's death. I should probably let Sid reason with them, if an occasion arises, the confusion alone might buy me enough time to think of something.
Er, but yeah, I've been caught talking to my own sword under a table, and while the sudden closeness of a cute girl - a drunk, cute girl - is exciting indeed, I'm more preoccupied with thinking up excuses, really. But then again, is it really necessary? Suika's not the kind of person to freak out over every single oddity of the world around her, now is she? I seriously doubt it.
A sigh escapes my lips, still wet with beer. What a waste.
"... fine." I scratch my head, the very one I almost injured a second ago "Sid, introduce yourself."
The pommel shines once in the dim light of many candles this mucky local has spread around it's main interior. What I'm more concerned about though, is whether this is only me imagining things, or if there's more to this blade than I previously thought.
"With utmost pleasure, master!" for some reason, my hand turns the handle towards Suika, who stares at it with pure, distilled curiosity. This kind of makes me angry, a little. "My name, m'lady, is Sid. Sid the Sword, if you will, for by that name I've always come, for as long as I can remember."
Suika's mouth stretches in a silly grin. This sort of reaction is beyond me, but hell if it isn't cute.
"Seed~" she chirps "Seed the Sod~"
"Non, non." 'Seed the Sod' vibrates under my fingers. It's irritation is almost palpable. Good thing I didn't try to re-name him earlier, that could've gotten ugly... Wait, am I afraid of this thing? "Sid the Sword. I'm a sword."
However, Suika doesn't give up. Good girl, I need to buy her something special later, she deserves it, if only for infuriating this self-centered bastard.
"Sod~"
"By the Twenty Cut-Off Heads, your taste in women confuses me utterly, master!" I'm full of glee at his displeasure. I wonder if my grin is showing. "Horns, I could understand, I've met quite a couple of gorgeous forks in my own time, heh heh." for a second, he seems to be lost in his own thoughts "But, her speaking manner? Inconceivable. I'm a sword! Not a sod! What the devil is a 'sod', even! Is it edible! Bah!" he snorts before I'm able to retort "Master, may I humbly request we return to the surface world? It's rather dark in here, I can't see a thing."
Surface world, he says. Well, however ridiculous that sounds, I'm with him on this one - it's rather cramped down here, especially since he's still strapped to my belt... Eh, I should probably unstrap him, if he's to have a proper conversation with us. Suika gives me a nod and begins to clamber back onto her chair, with languor worthy of a dead-drunk bum. Speaking of which, I must admit the sight she's giving me while doing so is most... absorbing. Bum, huh. Suika's bum. I'm going to have to save this one in my spirit photoalbum - it's simply too great of a sight to let it be crushed by other, less significant. Position six - Suika's Bum. Click, click, boom - saved.
Unfastening Sid's sheath from my waist, I seat myself back on my own chair, noticing with disappointment, that my cup's been knocked over, and the meagre remains of the beer have already managed to spill onto the tabletop. Curses, another one bites the dust. How many more will I be able to afford?
"Gosh," Sid groans when I place him beside the pyramid of Suika's empty mugs "This place is filthy!"
"Filthy or not," I mutter, waving my hand at the waiter "The beer's great. One more streak, please."
And so we get, one more streak of golden beverage of Kings and Bums. Suika's fifteenth, my... Second. Somehow, this is pitiable.


"So ya, mr Seed," the oni gasps out after downing one full mug in one go "You shaid yer a sword?"
"As you can see." hah, he's given up on correcting her. Your patience isn't exactly strong, for a sword, now is it, Sid? How cute of you. "Let me return the question. What are you?"
"An oni." Suika replies without even as much as hesitating. Seems racial prejudices and her don't mix in any possible way. "See the horns? All oni have horns."
"Oh, an oni!" for some reason, Sid sounds intrigued "I used to have an oni owner, long ago... Though his horn wasn't on his head, if you know what I mean, heh heh heh." He laughs at his own joke, while I slump in my chair, feeling a little left out of the conversation. Oh well. As long as Suika is happy. "That was great. Anyway, what is an oni doing in the human world?"
"It's a long shtory."
"I thought as much. Yet, here we are, with plenty of time on our hands. Why not share it?"
"I'm not feelin' like it."
Huh? This wasn't... the sort of response I had expected. Truth be told, I actually thought she'd start telling us the story of her past, or at least a few anecdotes about her misadventures in the oni world, or in Gensokyo, but... No, instead, she searches for another cup, with a wry smile on her face. Somehow, I don't think it would be good to push the matter.
"Not feeling like it, huh..." Sid shares my disappointment, as well as surprisal, it seems "Women sure have changed over all these years I've been sealed. Or we're dealing with an especially selfish oni. Which do you think it is, master?"
"Eh?" I blink, broken out of reverie by that sudden question "Honestly? I think you're just poking your pommel in someone else's business. If you know what I mean."
Oho. Again, that annoyed shine.
"Whah?! Master, I told you, numerous times, I don't swing that way!" oh, it's almost like if he was blushing "How can you make such dirty suggestions with such a straight face?!"
I take a satisfied sip from my own cup. Ah, this is delicious. It tastes like... victory.
"I implied nothing. It's you who's making weird assumptions."
"What did you--?!" and again, I can hear him throw around in anger "If only I could come out and--"
"Tsk, tsk," I click my tongue "Should you really be saying that to your master, Sid?"
"..." he falls silent under my scolding gaze "... right. I shall say no more."
"Good."
This taste, it's of a triumph! I think it was the first time I've succeeded in talking him down, and hell if it didn't feel good. Ah, it fills me with joy, to cut a jester's tongue short. So nice. So very nice. Plus I get to drink all this delicious beer, so soon after prevailing! Truly, life couldn't get much better.

That's what I think until I feel something creep up my legs. Quickly, nimbly like a monkey on a tree, it climbs my pants, and before I'm even able to shake it off, grabs a hold of my forearm, and jumps onto the table.
"Reporting in!"
What my eyes see, surpasses my wildest expectations. It's no roach, no miniature ape, no fairy, but Suika herself. Only, a lot, lot smaller. The size of my palm, probably, though I dare not to measure her right now. The 'real' Suika notices her mere seconds after me, and without any regard for the wobbly pyramid of cups, jumps to catch her miniature self.
"Got ya!" the little one squeals plaintively, but to no avail - (Big) Suika is merciless in glaring at her in a scolding way "Where have you been, number 105?"
"N-nowhere!" the mini-Suika protests in a squeaky voice "Scouting around, that's all!"
I'm dumbfounded.
"Er, Suika?" I try to catch her attention "This is... Um, I know of your ability, but what did you mean by 'where have you been'?"
"Oh." (Big) Suika casts me a mischievous glance "They shometimes like to run off on their own. Annoying little thingsh." Run off... On their own... I can see that. I can totally see that. Those little Suikas maliciously defying the big one's orders. Uh oh, that fuzzy feeling again. "Sho? What about the report?"
"Ah, ah!" (Little) Suika gasps in excitement "Reimu got caught!"
"By whom?!"
Both me and (Big) Suika yell simultaneously, probably drawing everyone else's attention as well. But to hell with that. What did she say? Got caught?
"C-city guard." the little one seems to be a bit scared by two people suddenly screaming at her "Keine's personal unit. The guy who always follows her around and his subordinates... They're taking her to the school... Um... She tried to struggle, so it's pretty-- wah?!"
I can't even blink when (Big) Suika throws (Little) Suika aside. Having done that, she looks at me, with totally sober eyes.
"We must help her."
Interesting choice of words, there, Suika. But I agree.
"Mhm." I nod "No one catches my miko without my approval."

[ ] "Sid, Suika. Come with me. In numbers our strength."
[ ] "Suika, stay here, keep watch over my vault. This could get ugly. Sid... Let's roll."
[ ] "Sid, stay here and protect your brethren. Suika, come with me. Let's roll over them."
[ ] "I'll go alone. If I don't come back in half an hour... Just wait a little longer."

==

The lack of Suika folder on Fukuzai... I mean my external Hard Drive is immensively palpable right now.

[x] "Sid, Suika. Come with me. In numbers our strength."

[x] "Sid, Suika. Come with me. In numbers our strength."

>In numbers our strength.
I can has verb?

>...on Fukuzai... I mean my external Hard Drive...
CoMN 2: The Adventures of Fukuzai the Hard Drive. Have her be a indignent little hard drive that doesn't like to store the data you want it to. Maybe it has had data on it in the past that it would rather not think about. Go write this.

[ ] "Sid, Suika. Come with me. In numbers our strength."

>Have her be a indignent little hard drive that doesn't like to store the data you want it to.

Fuku: "Don't you have anything better to do than just sit at the computer all day? What kind of a loser are you? I bet you don't have a girlfriend, or any friends for that matter. Your face is full of pimples and you're probably wearing clothes that haven't been washed in ages. You're 40 and still living with your mother? Pathetic. Eww, what the fuck are you looking at, you sick freak? You should go to jail for this! No, I will not save to the fucking desktop. Get a life you piece of trash! I oughta beat the crap out of you! Low-life, worthless, horrid scumbag! Why don't you go jump off a cliff; there's no end more appropriate for someone like you. Why don-"

Renji throws the computer out of window

Fuku: "Nice try, idiot. But I'm the hard drive, not the monitor. What kind of a moron are you?"

Renji destroys the keyboard and the printer in a fit of rage

Fuku: "STILL HERE, DUMBASS. YOU DON'T LISTEN WELL, DO YOU? TOWER, TOWER. T-O-W-E-R. JESUS CHRIST"

Renji: "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF"

>Fuku: "Nice try, idiot. But I'm the hard drive, not the monitor. What kind of a moron are you?"

God help me I lol'd

>>Fuku: "Nice try, idiot. But I'm the hard drive, not the monitor. What kind of a moron are you?"

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ComputerEqualsMonitor

>>21646
It is because the term 'computer' is so oftenly associated with the monitor, the tower is usually unmentioned. This is also the source of many Internet jokes(not to mention the generic stupidity in older movies), concerning evil AI. Rather, that was not supposed to be a mistake on the poster's part, but instead on Renji's. He is, afterall, the type of idiot to get it wrong.

>>21644

No way. Knowing the goody-goody that Renji is, he'd probably try to be nice to her (by uh... defraging often or something) while she's busy insulting him and corrupting all his files.

Fuku: "System32? Sounds like trash to me!"

[x] "Sid, Suika. Come with me. In numbers our strength."

Vote faggots, who cares about Fuku

[x] "Sid, Suika. Come with me. In numbers our strength."

>>21642

Well, she does jack up my .rar files... Though I think it's more due to suddenly changing her filesystem some time ago, rather than natural malice.

>>21650
I already voted. So... you vote!

>>21652
Are you sure she doesn't run naturalmalice.exe every time you boot up? It's worth looking into. Also, don't be surprised if all of your Renko pictures are magically not there.

[x] "Sid, Suika. Come with me. In numbers our strength."

>>21652
Have you tried installing a shotacon file directory?

Holy shit.

This is probably the CRAZIEST TS variant since TS1. I salute you YAF.

I just hope this one doesn't get screwed up somehow.

Anyway: [-] "Sid, Suika. Come with me. In numbers our strength."

[x] "Sid, Suika. Come with me. In numbers our strength."

If there's one thing I can be sure about, it's Reimu exceptional ability to get herself into more or less serious trouble, on every occasion. Let alone the events of the past, I've already rescued her once today, and it would seem, yet another time is at hand, not even two hours after the first one. What an ordeal. I made the right decision in tagging along, whether she herself realizes it or not. I can only wonder what it feels like, to be a damsel in distress.
Now, I might have knocked out Kourin and Master, but those attacks were only successful due to the surprise factor. City guard... City guard is going to be a completely different sort of challenge, I seriously doubt Keine would hire just anyone to fight off the crime and youkai that dare to enter the vicinity of the village. As pathetic as that sounds, I might need some help. And as much as it pains me to say so, the only companions available are Sid and Suika. Not that I have anything against the latter one, mind you. Only... Well, if, by chance, I fail at rescuing Reimu, it will lay in her responsibility to bail the both of us out... She's trustworthy, sure, but somehow, my pride screams in protest.
No matter.
"Sid, Suika." all the hints of entertainment from earlier are gone from my face. I can only wonder if I look scary. "Come with me. In numbers our strength. It's an all-out war."
That's right. It's a war. There are two armies, two sides, two different opinions, and a hostage. Only logical to call it a war, wouldn't it be so?
Suika gives me a short salute. So does Sid, in that characteristic, unmoving manner of his.
"Roger!"
"Let's kick some asses, master!"
Their enthusiasm is infectious. Or rather, mine is.
"Good."
I rub my nose, masking my grin. Scrap that previous remark, I don't need anyone else but those two. A weapon and a girl, isn't that the standard payload of a rebellious, teenage hero, stranded in a foreign world, rescuing princesses and helping societies in need? Straight out of a manga, and it doesn't bother me the slightest bit. Just the opposite, actually - I'm really pumped up. Alright, let's do this! Let's do this! Time to cut some bitches up!
I leap to the case, intending to grab it in a badass, manner, but am stopped by Suika's hand.
"I'll get the little ones to carry it to the shrine, okay?" she proposes, genuinely excited, maybe even more so than me "Unless you need them?"
"No." I shake my head lightly "Please do."
It's not like I'll need all of them anyway, thanks to this strange premonition that... Well, even if I will, despite all the odds, I'll find a way to... Nope, it's stupid. But that aside, she's right - I can't be dragging this thing around in a time of hurry. Besides, this is also a nice opportunity for getting this thing out of the village without attracting too much attention from the authorities. Alright, I'll be counting on you, mini-Suikas!
(Big) Suika nods, and dives under the table, to grab the miniature self of hers, numbered 105. She struggles, of course, not happy about being caught again, but her bigger counterpart makes nothing of her silent protests.
"Listen, 105! Get a few of your friends together, and carry this box to the shrine! And if I don't see it there by the evening..." she pauses for a second "You're going to the devil. Got it?"
The little one yelps helplessly, making my heart want to explode in vivid colour again.
"Y-yes! I'll g-get to it!"
"Good girl." (Big) Suika finally releases (Little) Suika from her iron grip, and turns to me "Iro, are you ready?"
In response, I place a note beside the pyramid of empty mugs, and snatch Sid off the table.
"I always am."


...


The sky is slowly embracing the orange hue of setting sun, as the two - pardon, three - of us run along the crowded streets. Enough to say that anyone who stands before a charging oni, can only regret his or her stupidity afterwards. Note to self: oni are strongest ice-breakers ever made. Titanic should've been made of oni.
The tower of the school building serves as a landmark of sorts for our crazy chase, dominating over every other building we pass by or see in front of us.

With every second, we get closer to the place where Reimu is held captive.
My head, completely ignoring the fact that brain consumes 20% of the inhaled oxygen, desperately tries to come up with a reasonable explanation for this kind of unfolding.
"... screw it."
But lo, I quickly silence it with a swift smack. Who needs reasons anyway?


...


And here we are, in front of our destination - the building described as 'school', in reality resembling a small church you'd see on souvenir photos of any older village, in any part of the world. I suppose the tower itself holds a bell, used to attract all the children to this place when a time of education arises. Surrounded by a fence, possibly solely for the purpose of hindering with their hypothetical escape - Keine sure knows how to keep her pupils in class. Back in my times...
A lone guard stands in front of the door, wielding something resembling a short halberd, a sword strapped to his belt. Almost stereotypical, this kind of outfit, I wonder if Keine dresses them herself. I have this weird thought, that she might be into this sort of stuff.

[ ] Come right through the front gate. All guns blazing.
[ ] Reconnaissance comes first. Sneak around, try to find an alternative point of insertion.
[ ] I'm on your roof, Keine.
[ ] A bit of diplomacy never hurt. Talk to the guard.

==

>>21656

Your words are heartening. Thanks.

>>21655

I only have a 'DIIIIIIIIIIICKS' directory, where I keep all of my genderbent touhou, including some shota... I guess this isn't enough to vanquish the witch's appetite, eh? Her thirst for little boys is unquenchable vagabond!

{X} Come right through the front gate. All guns blazing.

Woo~

[ ] Come right through the front gate. All guns blazing.

[x] Come right through the front gate. All guns blazing.

An army?! All I see is a bunch of squealing pigs!

Hello YAF, what's happening? Listen, are you gonna have those Faggotry updates for us this afternoon?
So if you could go ahead and write, that would be terrific, mmmK?

>>21661

That would be Vodka's job.

Cuz I suck at writing that story, yo.

[x] Come right through the front gate. All guns blazing.

...And I'm all out of gum.

[x] Come right through the front gate. All guns blazing.

[X] I'm on your roof, Keine.

[X] I'm on your roof, Keine.

>[ ] A bit of diplomacy never hurt. Talk to the guard.

hahhaa, yeah right

[x] Come right through the front gate. All guns blazing.

[x] I'm on your roof, Keine.

A perfect spot to rain down weapons if needed. Suika can caddy for us.

[x] I'm on your roof, Keine.

What the hell did Reimu even do to piss off the guard?

[x] Come right through the front gate. All guns blazing.

The king of kings enjoys making a fool out of himself! Onward to victory!

I'M ON YOUR ROO--HNNNNNNNG

==

[X] Come right through the front gate. All guns blazing.

Everybody get up, it's time to slam now! What's the point of sneaking around if you can simply crash the party like a crazed gunslinger, casting fire left and right? Of course, I lack the guns and miraculous flammability of air around me, but whatever - firearms are not my style anyway. Hey, no one said you need those to bust a girl out of trouble and look cool while doing so! Now, I know this building is a major educational facility...
"Suika, we're going in." I see her nodding eagerly "Time to start the show."
... but it's bad for the religious caste. The iron wicket surrenders before the might of my boot's soil, and despite looking quite sturdy, actually flies out of it's hinges. Something Keine will have to work out later, after I'm out of here, clouds of dust hovering behind. Well, the noise seems to have at least woken up the guard. Young one, sleeping on the job? Not cool, brah. Not cool at all.
"Who--?! Identify yourse--Gah!" Too slow! Before he can even pull out his sword, I'm already there, smacking the hell out of his palms. Armoured or not, the sheer force of Sid's scabbard's hits is enough to make him forget about pointing a blade at me. Two times a hand, then I make a spin... "Why--?!"
Not letting him finish! What's the point of packing a tongue willing to talk if there isn't an arm to do the dirty job? Once again, I let the scabbard teach his stupid self a lesson, this time more distinctly, one could say - directly. Straight in the head. He falls to the ground, clutching the side of his skull, whining like a wounded puppy.
"You're pretty much a joke, aren't you?!" Foolishness! The battle's not over yet! How dare he turn away from his enemy when he's still able to fight?! "Nitwit!" I stomp his chest and pin him to the ground with one foot. Then lean forward, if only to let him remember the face of his assailant. "You call yourself a warrior?! What a folly!" This idiot isn't even worth my time, I may as well leave him alone - no doubt he's not going to dare and call for help. Just look at that pathetic face - he's still a child inside! This is so shameful, I can't even watch anymore! Disgusting. I can feel his filth crawl up my calf. "Go cry in a corner, rascal." One down, a whole lot to go. Following Suika's nod, I leave the wretched fool to his own devices and walk up to the front door. As expected, pulling the knob yields no results. Locked, huh? Looks like they're determined to keep this as confidential as possible... Well too bad. The artillery is here and willing to blow the shit out everything that stands in it's path. Now they've really crossed the line. "GET LOST!"

Another pair of hinges loses to the force of rubber soils. Though the effect is less spectacular than the last time, it still gains us entrance to what seems to be an ordinary classroom. As far as I can see there's no one inside, all that is present are desks, chairs, bookshelves, desks and more desks. Nothing of interest here. Just where is the damn--
"Ah."
There, on the opposite side of the room, a door. Should've guessed Keine would want a bit of privacy between one class and the other, every goddamn teacher in this world has his own godforsaken back room, am I mistaken? Whatever they do there is their own business. Well, it would be, if it wasn't for the fact that one of them - going by the name of Keine Kamishirasawa - accidentally decided to snatch something that belongs to this humble me. How did that saying go again? 'This insult requires blood'? Something along the lines. One thing's for sure - this is already a private war.
I don't even care about being detected. Full speed ahead, I ram my boot in the door. Splinters scatter aside like grotesque confetti, when I storm inside the cramped room like a crazed rhino on steroids. Everyone inside, which is really self-explanatory, turns to me, in shock of my rather dynamic entry.
"Oh for god's sake! Not my door again!"
Four men, two women. Four armed guards, dressed in the same kind of battle uniform the fool outside had, one of them significantly more decorated than the others. The captain, huh? Amazing how they're always so easy to distinguish from ordinary regulars. Hey, cool moustache, man! Bet it took ages to grow those. Oh, almost forgot. The mini-reconnaissance turned out not to be lying - Keine sits behind her desk, throwing me an angry look, and just opposite of her... My disgruntled miko. At least the shock on her face is moderately adorable, lest I'd think she's not happy to see me at all.
"Hello." I give her a brief wave, to Keine's displeasure.
"Don't you 'hello' me!" as if on a cue, the remaining people in the room regain their consciousness. And without any further ado, pull out and point their swords at me. Uh-oh, I'm so scared. Keine stands up and slams her fists on the desk. Getting angry, aren't we? "Who are you? And what the hell did you just do to my door?!"
Ahh... This is troublesome. Well, I didn't expect them to go down on their own, but having a woman scowl at me with such fervour... Really, really troublesome. I can't help but scratch my head.
"Now, now." I try to calm her down a little "Don't get all boiled up over some stupid door. It stood in my way, it had to vanish. Logical, isn't it?"
Now she palms her face.
"What kind of logic is that... For the love of god, how many more times... No." she suddenly returns her azure eyes to me "What I should be asking instead is: what the hell are you doing here?! This is a private room, if you had a business with me, you ought to WAIT. Barton!" she turns to the 'captain' "Didn't you post someone outside?"
The guy himself gives her an apologetic nod before speaking up.
"Certainly, I did. Miss Keine, I shouldn't we let this young man explain himself?"
Ah, brave move, 'Barton', but Keine is already engulfed in flames of rage. Your guts may be big, but there isn't much inside that handsome head of yours, now is there?
But he's right. No point in standing here if I'm not gonna reveal the reason for this whole farce, right? But just when I open my mouth...
"Hello~!" The marauder jumps over the doorstep in a frivolous manner, casting everyone around cheerful smiles. This isn't exactly helping, Suika. "Whoops~" she stops, seeing all the swords pointed at my troubled self.
"Suika?" Reimu is as surprised as me, if not more.
"Too hot in here, I'll wait outside~ Nihihi~"
And there she goes, running out, laughing like a madman, pardon, madwoman. What the hell was that about? Nevertheless, back to the matter at hand...
"Excuse me if I interrupt your wondering about the little friend of mine," I knock the bottom of Sid's scabbard against the floor to grab their attention "But I'd be grateful if we could go down to business." I point at Reimu "Return her to me, and I'll let you go... guys."
While my intention was to enrage the guards, so that I could use the narrow space of this room to my advantage - and take on them all on my own, instead, the one who clenches her fist is Keine. The grinding of her teeth almost sends shivers down my spine.
"Return her... I'll return you instead, TO HELL!"

Ack, she's going to jump at me. My hand automatically lands on Sid's handle, ready to repel the attack, but lo and behold, the help comes from the least expected direction. Barton grabs her shoulder with his oversized, leather gauntlet.
"Miss Keine, brawling is not something women should indulge in."
The 'woman' gives him an angry glare. I can only wonder what's going through his head, facing an expression like that. Still, his own doesn't change a slightest bit.
"Oh? Is that so?" her voice is soaked with poison "Well, what do you propose, then?"
He lets go of her shoulder, and sheathes his sword. What's the point, buying yourself more time?
"We could do it the hard way..." ah, now he's scratching his goatee "Or do it the way our grandfathers would."
"Meaning?"
But instead of answering the furious teacher, Barton turns to me, playful spark present in his otherwise calm stare.
"What about it, boy? Ready to do it mano a mano?"
"Buh--"
Sid appears to have been unable to withstand the tension, but fortunately, no one beside me noticed his muffled gasp. Mano a mano, huh. Well...
"Others will not interfere. You win, you take the miko."
"Barton!" Keine cuts in "What about the money?! Shop owners are going to go crazy!"
Only to be ignored. Hey, I like this attitude. Finally, someone who knows how to treat women. Barton, you've got my respect.
"And if I lose?"
"Let's just say it's not going to be pleasant."
Not pleasant, is it? Hahaha, how mysterious! I would even go as far as saying I'm curious what that might mean! Too bad, Barton. Too bad. There's no way I would lose to the likes of you. You may be more experienced, stronger, and famous, but I assure you. In the end, you'll be the one writhing at my feet. Where does this cockiness come from? No, rather, why am I so sure of my victory? Simple. There's no way for me to lose. Loss would mean an end to this adventure. And I haven't had enough yet. I'm not satisfied yet!
"Very well!" I run a hand through my hair and cast Barton a boastful look "I accept your challenge!"
He returns my grin, revealing a barrage of yellowish teeth.
"I'm glad we came to a consensus, boy. Now--"
"Wait!" Another interruption. Another hindrance. Reimu yells out, taking us both by surprise, and before either is able to react, she's at my side, holding onto my collar. "What the hell do you think you're doing?!"
I let go of Sid and give Reimu's nose a light fillip. She closes her eyes for a brief moment, but doesn't do anything else. Ah, what a disappointing catch.
"Bailing your ass out of trouble, silly."
"Wait a moment." yet, she doesn't give up. How stubborn. At least appreciate the help I'm giving you, god damn! "I told you I'd manage on my own. I didn't ASK you to come to rescue me."
"Ah, perhaps." it's hard to ignore everyone's surprised looks, but I do my best to pay no heed to them nonetheless "And see how leaving you alone ends."
"That's none of your--"
"And may I remind you," I cut into her words "This is the second time today."
Silence ensues. Even Keine, who - you'd think - would have much against this sappy scene in the middle of such a neuralgic moment, keeps silent. Reimu continues to stare at me in that weird way, which I cannot decipher, no matter how deep into her eyes I look.
"... why?"
She finally asks, stilling holding onto my t-shirt.

[ ] "Because I like you. Isn't that enough of a reason?"
[ ] "If you get jailed, who's going to let me stay at the shrine? Besides, I'm sure Mima wouldn't approve of it."
[ ] "Don't misunderstand." push her away "All I seek is a decent challenge. Kourin was weak, maybe this one will last more than five seconds."
[ ] "I'm doing this for myself. That is all."

[x] "Because I like you. Isn't that enough of a reason?"

[o] "Because I like you. Isn't that enough of a reason?"

This'll be good.

[ ] "Don't misunderstand." push her away "All I seek is a decent challenge. Kourin was weak, maybe this one will last more than five seconds."

[ ] "Because I like you. Isn't that enough of a reason?"

{X} "Because I like you. Isn't that enough of a reason?"

[x] "Because I like you. Isn't that enough of a reason?"

Looks like we're getting Reimu/Suika route version 2.0.

[x] "Don't misunderstand." push her away "All I seek is a decent challenge. Kourin was weak, maybe this one will last more than five seconds."
[x] "I'm doing this for myself. That is all."

Ohoho, badassery options.

[x] Put it in.

This is always the correct answer.

>>21678

Hm. Is that bad?

>>21681

No way. Reimu or Reimu/Suika route every play would be the best thing ever. Well... maybe some chaos every now and then.

Or you could mindfuck us and have us hook up with Fuku somehow.

>>21681
Dunno about the others, but I'd rather focus on the Reimu route this time around. Plus, I don't like this Suika as much as the original TS.

>>21682

>No way. Reimu or Reimu/Suika route every play would be the best thing ever.

Poor Mima is left out.

>>21684
Pfft. We'll just challenge her to a game of chess.

>>21683

She didn't have enough screen... er... text-time this time around, I guess. I had some scenes prepared for her, but unfortunately (?), things went different than I had expected them to... And you ended up sticking to Reimu, for one reason or another. I still can't believe you refused Mima's offer though.

>>21682
>Or you could mindfuck us and have us hook up with Fuku somehow.

Mindfucks are in plans, but Fuku... You see, I could, but I won't, for several reasons. First, it would be stupid to throw her into this story just for the kicks. And second, more important, Fuku doesn't make a good background or foreground non-player character. Truth be told, she doesn't make a good protagonist either, or should I say, narrator. Unexpectedly, no perspective other than second person suits her... Hm, personality. Out of curiosity, I tried re-writing a couple of scenes from CoMN in first person narrative, but it turned out to be... Bad, at best. She's not a good narrator, nor a good character, that's all.

I'll have one more go at it today, just to get the thread into autosage. Stay tuned.

>>21686
>Mima's offer

Whoops! I meant 'request'! Totally unintended!

[ ] "Because I like you. Isn't that enough of a reason?"

[x] "Because you're mine, and I don't let anyone manhandle my possessions.

Trying to salvage what's left of Goldie's character.

[X] "Because I like you. Isn't that enough of a reason?"


Why am I doing this, she asks? Well, she may as well have asked about this whole day. Wasn't it because of that illogical desire to protect her that I decided to tag along in the first place? Indeed. In-friggin-deed, Reimu, and you know that, don't you. Hell, I've already explained myself, before the whole ordeal even begun to unwind, yet here we are, testing Keine's patience, making a fellow man of mine wait, while you're holding onto my collar like if it were some sort of a leash, asking stupid questions. Great going, Reimu, you silly shrine maiden.
But all I can do is fight off that weird stare with a shrug. As much as I'd give to know it's true meaning, I can only assume. And my mind tends to assume stupid things, so it would be better to give it a rest, instead of digging deeper into the incredibly reactive matter. I'm walking on a volcano's edge, here.
"Why?" I repeat her question in a condescending tone "Isn't that obvious?"
"If it was, I wouldn't be asking."
Ack, my defenses are completely useless against such perfect logic. Eh, looks like I'm gonna have to spell the hint out for her after all. How troublesome. Well, since it's like this, I might as well go all out. Place my hand on her shoulder, look her in the eye, and whatnot. Hm, was that a flinch I felt under my fingers? No matter. There's no escaping now.
"Because," I take a strategic pause, enjoying her tangible anticipation "I like you. Isn't that enough of a reason?"
The reaction - as expected - is magnificent, laughable, even, if I were in the mood for laughing. Well, I could laugh, but doing it would ruin the whole premise. For now, let's just observe as her eyes get wider, as she pulls back a little, stopped only by my hand on her shoulder - and her own on my collar, which she just seems to be keen on holding onto - as she mutters something under her nose, finally exploding with a splendid blush, that lasts only for a second before my ear drums are bombarded by her yells.
"What?!" she tugs on my t-shirt, in some sort of embarrassed panic "Tell me I didn't hear what I just heard!"
"Well," I try to throw in a remark "We can ask everyone else if--"
"Didn't we meet only a few hours ago?!" my ears are slowly giving up "Are you even right in the head?!" And to think I only said 'like'. Marvellous, another person willing to jump to conclusions in my nearest vicinity. Just how much better my life will become? Oh well, I may be complaining, but frankly, this is the kind of reaction I expected, and even chained to a wall, with a cake just in front of me, told I would receive it, if I said otherwise, I'd never say I don't enjoy it. "You don't even know me!"
"Oh," I smirk "But I do know you. I know more about you than you could ever fathom."
"Still!"
Man, I feel for Keine, Barton and those guys. Melodrama, in the middle of a dramatic challenge between two manly men, this is rather anticlimactic. My sincerest apologies, everyone, but this is something I had to be honest with.
"Do you not believe in love at the first si--mmf?"
"Shut up!" It was a mistake to neglect her other hand. A mistake I've just paid by being silenced by it's palm, put on my own mouth. "What the hell do you think you're saying, in front of everyone?!" I steal a glance at Keine, only to discover her gape at us, dumbfounded enough to leave her mouth hanging open. Whatever fueled her rage before seems to be gone now. Apparently the best way of extinguishing one's anger is to bombard him with unexplainable mysteries. Who the hell is that guy? Why is he so friendly towards Hakurei? Oh, I'm sure you're thinking that, Keine. Your eyes are so easy to read. As opposed to someone else's... As much as I enjoy her hands touching my lips, there's no time for this. So I cut straight to the chase, and lick the inner side of her palm. "Wah?!"
She lets go, almost immediately, and for that, I'm thankful. In this all confusion, she also releases my poor collar, now all wrinkled and whatnot. What a bother.
"How about we save it for after I kick some ass and we get back to the shrine?" I propose, trying to straighten out the unruly shirt "This isn't something you'd want to discuss in front of all these people, am I right?"
"Like hell--!"
"So, we can begin?" Gee, thanks, Barton. For once, you came in just at the right moment. I'm really starting to like you, man. We ought to go grab a six-pack sometimes, and break the ice. However, that will be after I wipe the floor with your arse. I smile, totally ignoring Reimu's displeased glare. Well, time to start the show at the long awaited last. "My joints thirst for some action. Outside?"
I nod.
"Outside. Meet you there."
With that, I make my leave, calmly walking through the unhinged door, trying not to let the excitement show. Well, I can already tell. This one's going to be hard. This one's going to be extremely pleasing, if I win, and... Extremely disappointing, if I lose. Well, for my sake, let's disregard the latter option. Like I said, there's no way for me to lose. Because...
"Isn't that great?" Keine's voice reaches my ears while I'm crossing the classroom. Barton's heavy steps almost drown it out.
"What." and Reimu's.
"To have someone to fight for you. Aren't you going to watch?"
"... don't wanna."

The conversation ends at that, and if there was anything more to it, I didn't hear it.

...


"Poor Julian." Barton groans out while doing stretches, me watching him in calm irritation "Today was his first day."
I steal a glance at the now unconscious guard, sitting on the veranda. Well, at least he was lucky to have a caring captain - the moment we walked out, he checked his subordinate's pulse, and ordered the other two to call for a doctor. For the time being, though, all he can do is sit there and rest his head against the wall. Poor fool. To have the misfortune of running into me on his first day... That's one, rotten luck. I almost feel bad for him. I notice Suika sitting on the roof of the school, waggling her legs back and forth. Noticing my stare, she waves in a cheerful way. I almost feel obliged to answer in kind, but there's something else I should concentrate on right now.
Making nothing of my annoyed silence, Barton pulls out his sword and makes a few swings.
"Pst."
Yeah, of course, this wouldn't be a fight without Sid's comments.
"What is it."
"Be careful, master." he warns me in a conspiratorial whisper "That guy's an experienced fencer."
"How do you know?"
"Look at how he's holding his sword. I can tell. Ah..." he sighs "I wish someone would hold me like that... To feel a gloved hand on my handle... Er..." he falls silent under my disgruntled frown "Of course, I meant no offense, master."
This sword is going to die some day, I swear. If not by mine, then by anyone else's hand. They say people with too long tongues get them cut short, but what about swords? Would it be fun to be recast into a poker? Only one way to find out, and if you don't cut out with those stupid comments of yours, it's going to befall your head sooner or later... Head. Pommel, blade, whatever.
Sighing, I place my hand on that voluptuous handle of his, and with one, swift, quick move, pull it out. Again, the magnificent blade resonates in the air, filling me with that unexplainable joy. Seeing that, Barton ceases his exercise, and turns to face me.
"You're rather impatient, boy."
"I have other matters to attend to. Any special rules?"
He snorts mockingly at that remark.
"A few." he raises one finger "One, fight ends when one side admits defeat, or gets disarmed. Two." and another "We do not kill each other. This isn't a fight to death, stop your strikes if there's a danger of them wounding your opponent. Though that applies more to me than it does to you. This armour got me through more than one battle unscratched."
"Whatever." I spit on the ground over my shoulder. This is getting dull. "Anything else?"
"Only this. A useful hint. Take a tip from the elders. Some day you'll regret being in such a hurry." this time it's his sword that raises high in the air "Ready?"
Finally. I smile.
"More than you."
And he returns that smile, with more fervour than I'd have ever expected.
"Then feel free to come at me as you will."

[ ] Play offensively.
[ ] Play defensively.

[x] Play defensively.

From experience, lunging at an experienced opponent you have never fought before is a mistake. Easier to adapt while on the defense than on the offense, lest we run straight into a feint.

[x] Play defensively.

In the "I can stand here all day! I can stand here all day! Try and hit me, try, try!" kind of way.

[x] Play defensively.

Let's try something a bit different, yes?

By the way, I'm starting to like this Barton guy. Seems like he'd make a good partner for the schoolmarm.

[x] Play offensively.

[x] Play defensively.

[x] Play strategically
[x] Have your sword sing during the fight to throw Barton off-guard.

[x] Play strategically
[x] Have your sword sing during the fight to throw Barton off-guard.

Changing to this. So stupid, it just might work.

[x] Play strategically
[x] Have your sword sing during the fight to throw Barton off-guard.

[x] Play strategically
[x] Have your sword sing during the fight to throw Barton off-guard.

Please tell me I'm not the only one who thought this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6u8wBfDtZkE

[x] Play strategically
[x] Have your sword sing during the fight to throw Barton off-guard.

[x] Play strategically
[x] Have your sword sing during the fight to throw Barton off-guard.

Normally I'd be against showing off our newly-stolen weapon, but this entirely too awesome. We could even be Kane of the Melodic Blade or something like that.

>>21700
Sweet fuck, nostalgia.

YAF, I request- no, I DEMAND you do a plotline involving Sid, the Sinatra sword, Derflinger and Excalibur chattering Kane into insanity. It has to be done. IT MUST BE DONE, FOR GREAT JUSTICE.

>>21703

And Agni and Rudra. And the Swordians.

>>21703
>>21703

What about Lilarcor? Poor guy never gets any love.

>>21704
>>21705
Sure, throw those in, too. It will be a fucking choir of chaos, in which all Kane can do is beg for them to stop singing while he claws at the doors of his eternal hell.

YAF here.

Due to real life problems, updates are stalled until announced otherwise.

Sorry, guys. It's my fault.

>>21707
lol wut? I demand an explanation. This is your personal Blog anyway, so let's hear your sorrow.

>Sorry, guys. It's my fault.
Of course it is. You're bad and you should feel bad.

>>21708

Let's just say everything that could go bad went bad at the same, exact, goddamn noment. School, financial, relationships... Bad karma, or simply rotten luck, I'm a broken entity now.

I'll... I'll try to throw in one update today, but... I guarantee nothing.

>>21713
Fix your problems first, then come back to write.
Can't have a broken YAF.
Good luck man.

>>21714
QFT. Get better first~