[x]Kill jesta.

Its mah money, doe it.

[] Eat Carrot and be Full Bunny.

[x] Chuck Carrot at Big Bunny.

Oh hey, you actually did it! I wish you good luck.

[x] Eat Carrot and be Full Bunny.
I'm glad you followed through. Have a vote!

[x] Chuck Carrot at Big Bunny.

[x] Be Seiran.

[x] Chuck Carrot at Big Bunny.

No regrets.

Updates fucking when? I'm on the edge of my seat here.

[x] Chuck Carrot at Big Bunny.

We can't NOT take this opportunity.

[x] Put it in

[x] Chuck Carrot at Big Bunny.

She seems hungry.

[x] Chuck Carrot at Big Bunny.

The only option.

It'll be quick, it'll be real, it might be the end, unless inspiration strikes.

Tewi chucks the carrot at Reisen. It bounces off with the sound of a man in a sound booth smacking a block of wood on another block of wood.

Reisen drops her stack of boxes and turns around, firing finger-suppositories randomly around her and shouting something about "Tango-Squadron" and "Seiren, get them out of here" and similar such nonsense.

If that wasn't an indicator of what had happened, the thousand-yard stare probably was.

Tewi has triggered Reisen's PTSD.

And she's aiming at our heroines' little bunny head.


{-------------}

You are standing in a hallway. There is a door to your left, a corner behind you and a sleeping princess in front of you.

Reisen is in some kind of trance that looks like a completely uninformed stereotype of PTSD. She's pointing menacingly at you.

The carrot you threw has bounced back to your feet, conveniently enough.

Tewi is hungry.

[] Eat Carrot and be Full Bunny
[] Chuck Carrot at Big Bunny
[] Flee around the corner like a Cowardly Bunny
[] Take cover in the room to the left like a Scared Bunny
[] Take cover behind the Princess like a Silly Bunny
[] Hump Big Bunny's leg like a Horny bunny.
[] Call upon the Trapdoor Mokou like a Social Bunny.
[] Complain to Writefag for not writing fast enough like an Anonymous Bunny.
[] A clever write-in, like a Clever Bunny.


-----------

Note: If multiple options can be done together, go ahead and choose 'em. Just don't go running two directions at once. We're Tewi, not Suika/Flan/Parsee/Alice/Yuuka/A Good Writer.

Also, oh shit, I suddenly want to write all the things, but if I do, I may end up burning myself out later on down the line before I can make one of these on every board. I'll try to limit options better.

[x] Eat Carrot and be Full Bunny

It's time to live up to our family name and make an outdated reference.

[X] Eat Carrot and be Full Bunny
[X] Snap your fingers at Big Bunny, wake her.
[X] Ignore the comments about slow updates on a dead board.

[] Eat Carrot and be Full Bunny

[x] Chuck Carrot at Big Bunny
[x] Take cover behind the Princess like a Silly Bunny

The cycle must continue.

[x] Eat Carrot and be Full Bunny

[x] Eat Carrot and be Full Bunny
[x] Take cover behind the Princess like a Silly Bunny

[X] Hump Big Bunny's leg like a Horny bunny.
[X] Call upon the Trapdoor Mokou like a Social Bunny.
[X] Snap your fingers at Big Bunny, wake her.

[x] Eat Carrot and be Full Bunny

So close to Full Bunny! Don't let anyone stop you Tewi. Become what you were meant to be.

[x] Eat Carrot and be Full Bunny
[x] Take cover behind the Princess like a Silly Bunny

Let's see what happens when we take cover under an immortal.

1st!
7 votes - Eat Carrot and be Full Bunny

2nd!
3 votes - Take cover behind the Princess like a Silly Bunny

And, since I feel generous/You can do all of these realistically in one update-

3rd!
2 votes - Snap your fingers at Big Bunny, wake her.

Update pretty soon here.

Tewi grabs the carrot as she combat rolls unnecessarily behind the princess. A quick kick, and the princess is on her side, providing something that could be argued as cover. Not much cover, as the Beauty of Legend was understandably pretty damn skinny, but cover was cover.

Reisen, seeing her target duck into cover, did what any good soldier suffering from delusions and bad hollywood versions of medical issues would do. She mimed tugging something off of something else, then cocked back her hand.

"FIRE IN THE HOLE!" She screamed as she chucked nothing behind the princess, turning and diving away, covering her head to avoid shrapnel.

Seeing as Reisen was waiting for an explosion to happen, Tewi had ample opportunity to get her bearings. Reisen was, as usual, going commando, but aside from that, nothing really of note that would block the way to her. The coast was clear.

Tewi hopped up and ran up to Reisen, snapping her fingers in her face. Reisen jolted in shock, but sat up almost immediately, confusion plain on her face. She did not see Seiren sitting in the trenches with her in boot camp, not her commanding officer bearing down on her in Basic Training, and definitely not Rush Hour Moon Traffic. Instead, she saw Tewi nibbling the tip of a carrot.

Before she had time to do more than get teary eyed, however, a loud explosion rocked the hallway.

Reisen and Tewi jumped in shock. Reisen tried to cover her head, but something slammed into her hands mid-motion.

Princess Kaguya's head took the last remaining second it had to utter one word.

"Dafuck?"

Reisen's scream echoed throughout the Bamboo Forest, though Tewi didn't hear it. Her ears were still ringing.

Tewi finished her carrot.


{-------------}

You are standing in a hallway. There is a door to your right (Formerly your left), an intersection behind you and a passed out Big Bunny in front of you.

The passed out Big Bunny is holding the Princess' head. It's sprouting creepy meat tendril things as it regenerates the Princess' body. And clothes, for some reason.

The hallway is covered in blood and blackened from a psychic grenade. If Reisen can shoot bullets from her fingertips, then this isn't too far-fetched, is it?

The carrot fills your belly.

Tewi is a Full Bunny.

Tewi is holding the leafy green part of the carrot that isn't all that tasty.

Reisen has a potato in her shirt pocket that Tewi totally doesn't know is there because Tewi totally didn't look through her pockets.


[] Eat Potato and become Chubby Bunny
[] Play hacksack with the Princess' head and become Bloody Bunny/Sport Bunny.
[] Shove potato in hole and become Funny Bunny.
[] It's over already, anon, end the story like a Title Reading Bunny.
[] Write a write-in and be a Clever Bunny


-----------

The next one's it, guys. Then I move on to the next board.

[x] Shove potato in hole and become Funny Bunny.

I'm gonna be "that guy" and say that rabbits actually prefer the 'leafy green part of the carrot that isn't all that tasty' instead of the 'meaty orange part'. In fact, eating carrots (or any kind of root vegetable) usually gives bunnies tooth decay. They're much better off eating hay.

But hey, they're humanoids youkai, so that info might as well be false for them.

[X] Place potato within Kaguya as she regenerates to become Frankenstein bunny.

[X] Place potato inside Kaguya so it can become one with the princess. Long live Potato Princess

Gentlemen, we can rebuild her. We have the technology.

[x] Go exploring like a bored bunny.

I'm going to be the other "that guy" and say three things:

1. Pick a tense and stick with it. Present is recommended for the most part.

2. Pick a perspective and stick with it. I have no idea why you keep going from third- to second-person. If it's meant as a cute little gimmick, it's not a particularly sensible one.

3. Seiran, not Seiren.

[X] Place potato within Kaguya as she regenerates to become Frankenstein bunny.

IT'S... IT'S ALIVE! FOREVER!

[X] Place potato within Kaguya as she regenerates to become Frankenstein bunny.

[X] Eat Potato and become Chubby Bunny

>Tewi is holding the leafy green part of the carrot that isn't all that tasty.

Speak for yourself, carrot greens are good and can be a parsley substitute in a pinch.

>>26180

godfuckin'DAMMIT

I thought I corrected that.

Terrible habit, trying to work on it. Thanks for pointing it out, though, or it'd never have stopped.

>>26177
Huh. You learn something new every day.

[x] Shove potato in hole and become Funny Bunny.

>>26177
Bugs Bunny...all those years...you lied to me...

[X] Place potato within Kaguya as she regenerates to become Frankenstein bunny.

It looks like everyone wants a Frankenhime.

This'll be fun.

Tewi picks up the potato. She has an idea, but the timing needs to be perfect. When the Princess' heart has grown back part-way but the Princess' rib cage hasn't grown back, Tewi rips it out, holding the potato in place where it used to be. The heart, as predicted, begins growing over the potato. When the potato is in no danger of falling out of the Princess, Tewi jerks her hand back and waits.

The heart, fully grown, is soon followed by the rib cage. The rib cage never grows in until the heart grows in. Tewi couldn't for the life of her tell you why, but that's the way it is.

After only a good five minutes, the entire upper torso had grown back, and the first pink threads of clothing were forming.

Being a full bunny, and having set up some mischeif for later, Tewi leaves to prepare a camera in the kitchen.


------


The dinner table was silent.

The rabbits did not speak except when spoken to.

Reisen did not speak except in one word answers.

Tewi did not speak for fear that her laughter would give her away.

The doctor did not speak. Nobody could read her face, but something akin to shock or confusion could be considered a reasonable guess as to why.

The only person who spoke at the table was the Princess.

"You're so funny!" The Princess gushed. "I'm glad I met you Poteto-san."

Sitting at the Princess' right hand is "Poteto-san". (A seat usually reserved for the doctor, it should be noted.) Nobody saw when or how the Princess acquired a potato and she scolded anybody who 'dared to question Poteto-san's credentials', but she has a potato now and she refuses to put it down. It was all pretty funny at first, but after a week of watching the head of the household flirt with a potato, the only one who still found it funny was Tewi.

(-------------------)

The End


I know I wanted to go somewhere with that ending (involving a wedding), but I couldn't for the life of me find the right words to put down. So, here. A kinda' half-assed ending, but hopefully I didn't miss an unnecessary tense shift again.


FINAL VOTE!!!

We now shall vote on what board I should post my half-assed, but guaranteed-to-finish stories on next.

FIRST BOARD TO TWO WINS! If we make it fast, it gewts done fast, capiche?

Begin votes!

Is guess that vegetable... stole her heart.


[x] Shrine

Deadest board after this one.

[x] /border/

goasts

>>26188
/coriander/

[x] /border/

border it is
link up soon

>>26193
Well?

http://www.touhou-project.com/border/res/29984.html

Soon was too strong a word, but fuck it, here's your story. Have fun, guys.